


Survive This

by palominopup



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Reality Show, Gay Sex, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Switch Castiel, Switch Dean, mild homophobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-13
Updated: 2015-11-16
Packaged: 2018-04-26 06:09:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 54,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4993222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/palominopup/pseuds/palominopup
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean Winchester, a firefighter from Austin, Texas, is picked to be on this season’s Survivor.  He is up against 15 other players.  Castiel Novak, an author, from Boston, MA is one of the contestants.  They make it to the final two.  Will the million dollar prize tear them apart?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> In Chapter 16, there is a scene that some say is dubcon. I didn't mean it to be that way, nor do I see it that way, but I give this warning to those who are sensitive.

 

 

**Cue Survivor theme music….an announcer’s voice…**

  
_Survivor is the most physically demanding and emotionally taxing game on television. It strips you to your core while offering the opportunity to prove what you are made of. For those who win, the reward is grand. A million dollars and a high that may never be repeated. But for those who loose, the consequences are often a relentless nightmare of what ifs that never ends._

  
_Sixteen men and women travel to Swains Island, an unincorporated territory of the United States located in the South Pacific Ocean, halfway between Hawaii and New Zealand. American Samoa’s islands make up the eastern part of the Samoan Archipelago, whose people are Polynesian. Archaeologists state early Polynesians traveled from South East Asia into the Pacific populating the islands of the western Pacific from Papua New Guinea to Tonga and Samoa. The island is made up of sand and rock, rain forest and traitorous volcanic mountains._

_These are the men and women must outwit, outplay and outlast: Jo Harvelle, a 23 year old waitress from Lincoln, Nebraska; Kevin Tran, a 19 year old student from Chicago, Illinois; Lisa Braeden, a 31 year old yoga instructor from Las Vegas, Nevada; Cole Trenton, a 36 year old factory worker from Philadelphia, Pennsylvania; Anna Milton, a 26 year old elementary school teacher from Atlanta, Georgia; Dean Winchester, a 38 year old firefighter from Austin, Texas; Meg Masters, a 30 year old dancer from New York, New York; Gabriel Speight, a 44 year old baker from Raleigh, North Carolina; Charlie Bradbury, a 29 year old IT specialist from Seattle, Washington; Victor Henrickson, a 46 year old FBI agent from Phoenix, Arizona; Naomi Tapping, a 47 year old mother of five; Benny Lafitte, a 42 year old restaurant owner from New Orleans, Louisiana; Jodi Mills, a 44 year old police officer from Sioux Falls, South Dakota; Garth Fitzgerald IV, a 43 year old sheriff’s deputy from Jackson Hole, Wyoming; Bela Talbot, a 33 year old antiques dealer from Los Angeles, California; Castiel Novak, a 40 year old author from Boston Massachusetts._

  
_These are the survivors._

  
**Chapter One**

  
“I still can’t believe you’re in the Samoan Islands, Dean,” Sam said, his voice sounding distant on the room’s telephone. Dean’s cell wasn’t set up for international calling, so he had to rely on a land line.

  
Dean had landed in Pago Pago that afternoon. He really couldn’t believe it himself. “You should see this place, Sammy. The water is so fuckin’ blue.”

  
“Wait, you actually looked out of the plane window with getting sick?” Dean could hear his brother snickering even with the bad connection.

  
“Bite me. But hey, get this, I have a handler. He’s this guy named Harry.”

  
“A handler? What for?”

  
“He’s my babysitter until they drop us off tomorrow. I’m not allowed to meet the other contestants until then. I’m not even sure if we’re all at the same hotel.”

  
Dean and Sam talked another five minutes before Sam began to whine about the cost of the collect call. Dean hung up and leaned back on the king sized bed. This time tomorrow, he’d probably be sleeping on the ground. He was still in shock about being selected to be on the hit television show, Survivor. He wasn’t sure he was ready for thirty-nine days in the jungle with a bunch of strangers.

  
He got up and looked out the window of his hotel room. This was supposed to be the biggest city in the Samoan Islands, but it wasn’t what Dean was used too. As a firefighter in Austin, Texas, he was used to skyscrapers and wall to wall concrete.  
There was a knock on his door and he opened it to Harry. “Hi. I brought you a menu and once you decide what you want, I’ll bring it up to you.”

  
“Can’t I just walk around and find my own place to eat?” Dean doubted he’d find a cheeseburger or pie, but he figured he’d find something.

  
“Sorry, you can’t leave your room until we head to the dock tomorrow morning.”

  
“House arrest, huh?” Dean took the offered menu and moved aside so the man could enter his room.

  
“Basically.”

  
Dean opened the menu and was surprised to find normal things like fried fish and barbecued pork. Having never been out of the country, he expected a bunch of strange foods like octopus and sea urchin. He gave Harry his order and once the man left, he turned on the television. He found a local station that played movies and settled in to watch James Bond save the world.

  
His meal was good and he finished the movie while he ate. With nothing else to do, he got into a pair of sleep pants and opened his latest Castiel Novak novel.

  
Harry banged on his door the next morning. He opened the door, shirtless, hair sticking out in every direction and grumpy. “Fuck, what time is it?”

  
“Seven. We need to be at the docks by nine. At eight, you’ll need to have your suitcase packed. I’ll pick it up then. You can give me your breakfast order now.”

  
Dean scratched his belly and padded over to the menu. “Eggs, scrambled. Bacon. Cottage fries. Coffee. Oh, and orange juice.”

  
Dean took a quick shower and packed his suitcase. He picked up the instruction sheet and grabbed his toothbrush, bug repellent and sunscreen. Razors, toothpaste and other toiletries were not allowed. He dressed in a pair of cargo shorts and a white t-shirt. He stared at the strappy sandals Sam insisted would be the best for this trip and frowned. They were ugly. Dean Winchester didn’t do sandals or flip flops, but his normal work boots probably wouldn’t work well in the tropics. With a disgusted grunt, he put them on.

  
Precisely at eight, Harry showed up with his breakfast and he ate hardy, making sure to clean his plate. He’d seen the show enough to know that food was scarce and this would be the last good meal he had for a long time.

  
Harry checked Dean’s small net bag for any contraband and then took his suitcase, promising to be back in ten minutes. Dean paced the room, adrenaline already coursing through his veins. As a firefighter, Dean was in great shape and was used to stressful situations. He was in this to win.

  
The trip to the dock was in an open air jeep. When Dean got out, Harry pointed him in the right direction and left him. Dean walked to a small banner with the Survivor logo running across green fabric. Standing below it were eight people. Dean produced his best smile and most returned it. Others joined them until Dean counted sixteen. They made small talk, mostly about their excitement and exchanging names.

  
A man and woman wearing green polo shirts came up and herded them onto a boat. Dean felt queasy about five minutes out. He wasn’t used to boats…he hated planes…give him a car. Cars were the best mode of transportation in his opinion. He already missed his baby. The black Impala was currently sitting in his garage back home. Sam promised to go collect his mail and start her every few days to keep her running easily.

  
He must have looked a bit green, because the female handler came up and offered him a pill and a small cup of water. “Take this, it’s for seasickness.”

  
Figuring the embarrassment over having to take the damn pill beat out hurling in front of everyone, Dean swallowed it down. He lost track of time as the boat plowed through the water. He spent most of the trip looking over his competition. Most of the men looked like they could be contenders and a few of the women looked to be in great shape. There were a few women that Dean wouldn’t mind getting to know.

  
“Okay, everyone, we’ve got another twenty minutes before we get to the island. Jeff will be waiting. When we stop the boat, you’ll jump overboard and swim to shore. Any questions?”

  
No one spoke. Dean guessed that most were like him, just a bit overwhelmed. The handler nodded and went back to stand with the boat’s driver.

  
A pair of porpoises appeared next to the boat and rode the wake for a short time. Everyone was laughing and pointing. Dean wished he had his phone to take pictures. All their phones were packed away in their suitcases. The petite redhead that had been sitting directly across from Dean pointed. “There it is.”

  
Heads swiveled and Dean saw the island. He could make out Jeff Probst standing on the beach and two banners, one blue and the other red. There was a camera crew as well. This was the beginning. He bit his bottom lip and syked himself up. The motor stopped and Dean hit the water. He wasn’t the fastest swimmer, but he was strong. He was aware of splashing around him as the others jumped in, but he focused on the shoreline. The young Asian kid, the dark haired guy and the bitchy looking brunette beat him. The others straggled up onto the beach one by one.

  
The host, Jeff Probst, stood between the two banners. “Welcome to Swains Island.” Dean noticed the black, cloth bag he held in his hand. “One by one, you will come forward and reach into this bag…” He held it aloft. “…you will take a buff and the color will be your new team. The Upolu Team is blue and the Savaii Team is red.”

  
Jeff called out names and one by one, they came forward and picked their buffs. Dean tried to pay attention to names.

  
Anna, a gorgeous redhead, stepped over to the blue banner. Bela, the bitchy brunette moved under the red banner. The huge guy with the Cajun accent, Benny, joined Anna. Dean crossed his fingers hoping for the blue tribe. Castiel pulled out a blue buff and took his place with his teammates. The petite redhead, Charlie, picked blue too. Dean smirked. Two redheads…he was liking the blue team more and more.

  
Cole was the nice looking guy who looked like he worked out. He went to the red team.

  
“Dean.” Dean strode forward and reached his hand into the bag. He grinned when he pulled out the blue bandana. He quickly tied it around his head and joined the others with a few fist bumps.

  
Gabe was the sawed off, smarmy dude that had talked about nothing but food on the boat ride. He went to the red team. A skinny man named Garth skipped over to stand beside Dean. Dean was glad to see the pretty blonde named Jo go to the blue tribe.  
An older woman, Jodi, looked disappointed to be heading over to the red banner. The Asian boy held his red buff up and took his place. Dean winked at the slim brunette, Lisa, when she joined them. She gave him a flirtatious smile. He promised Sam that he wouldn’t embarrass himself on television by trying to hook up with anyone, but hey, he could flirt a bit…maybe even sneak off into the jungle for a quick…head in the game, Winchester.

  
Meg, the dark haired thirty something, Naomi, another older woman and Victor, the nice looking black guy rounded out the red tribe.

  
“Look around you. These people you’re standing with are your tribe.” Jeff paused while everyone did as he instructed. Dean thought he had a pretty good team. “Upolu, you will head out on that path. Follow the path until you get to a clearing, there will be a flag there. Take the flag and follow the marked trail. This will lead you to your new home.”

  
“Savaii, you will follow the beach around the bend. Continue walking until you come to a outcropping of rocks. Your flag will be there. Take it to your new home up the beach.”

  
Dean and his tribe set out. The path was narrow and they went single file until they reached the clearing. Charlie ran forward and untied the flag from the tree. There was a bucket filled with eight small bottles of water. While they drank, the tribe shared information. Dean learned that the Cajun owned a restaurant and he thought that was cool. Charlie was a computer nerd and the way she was eyeing the blonde, Dean’s gaydar decided she pitched for the other team. That was cool. Dean found men attractive. He didn’t act on it. Not since he was right out of high school. Working in a fire department where you slept and showered in the same room as a bunch of other dudes wasn’t the best environment to come out and say ‘I do dick sometimes.’

  
It turned out that the little guy was a sheriff’s deputy. Dean didn’t see that one coming. Looks could be deceiving though. The other redhead turned out to be a married teacher. Dean marked her off his list of conquests. Lisa was a yoga instructor. Bendy…yep…bendy was good. She moved to the top of his list. Jo was the blonde and was a waitress from Sioux Falls. Dean had an uncle in Sioux Falls. “You know Singer’s Automotive?”

  
She furrowed her brow, thinking. “I don’t think so. Why?”

  
“That’s my uncle’s place.”

  
“So, you visit him often?” Yeah, she was flirting. Dean smiled and decided Jo and Lisa were definitely worth pursuing.

  
Everyone looked at the guy with the weird name. Cas…something. “I’m an author from Boston.”

  
Wait…holy shit. Dean remembered the book that was packed away in his suitcase. “Castiel Novak?”

  
Blue eyes found his. He nodded. “Yes.”

  
“That’s fuckin’ cool. I’ve read all your books. I’ve got Angels Fall in my suitcase back…wherever our shit is.”

  
“Oh, thank you.” The words sounded stilted.

  
Benny cleared his throat. “Hate to break up the party, but we need to get to our camp and see what needs to be done before nightfall.”

  
Their hike resumed and Dean found himself behind the author. He had a nice ass, trim waist and his legs were muscular. He was in a pair of plaid shorts that hugged his butt and an AC DC t-shirt. Good taste in music made up for the lack of social skills.

  
The jungle thinned out and they stood on the edge of a lagoon. There was a small waterfall and a wooden crate sat on the shore. Dean and Benny opened the crate and removed the items. They got a machete, eight canteens, a shovel, a large cooking pot with a lid, a large burlap bag of rice and a map.

  
They gathered around the map and noted the locations of the well that would provide them with fresh drinking water, the tribal council area and other various landmarks. The camera crew that had followed them split up while Charlie and Anna went to fill the canteens. Benny, Dean, Castiel and Lisa began to plan a shelter, Garth took off to find a private area for a latrine and Jo began to gather firewood.

  
By nightfall, they had a rough structure made of bamboo, huge leaves and palm fronds. The fire pit remained unlit. Garth, claiming he was a boy scout, tried to light it by rubbing two sticks together. It didn’t work. Their dinner consisted of star fruit. The fruit grew wild and while Dean had never seen it before, both Castiel and Charlie insisted it was edible. They also found some coconuts. Dean broke open a few of them and the tribe drank the liquid inside.

  
Dean didn’t sleep well. The ground was hard and once he found the tiny ants crawling on his leg, he got up and walked to the edge of the lagoon. He saw another figure near the waterfall. Taking a chance it was one of the girls, he headed in that direction. As he got nearer, he realized it was Castiel.

  
“You couldn’t sleep either, huh?”

  
“No. The bugs seem to be a problem,” the man’s voice was deep and husky…sexy.

  
“Yeah, the bug spray I brought isn’t helping much.”

  
“I read about the flora and fauna, but didn’t pay much attention to the insect life.”

  
Dean chuckled. “Flora and fauna?”

  
Castiel looked directly at him and frowned. “Plant and animal life.” He said it like he wasn’t sure Dean was smart enough to know what the words meant.

  
“I know what you meant. I may be just a dumb firefighter, but I can read,” Dean’s voice had gone from friendly to cool in a split second.

  
“I am aware you can read. You informed me that you read my books,” He said matter-of-factly. “I wasn’t trying to insult you, but you did phrase it as a question.”

  
“I phrased it as a question because most normal people don’t talk like that,” Dean muttered.

  
“Normal isn’t all it’s cracked up to be,” Castiel responded quietly. Dean barely heard him over the sound of the waterfall.

  
“Why are you doing this?”

  
Now the man looked really confused if his tilted head and expression were any indication. “Doing what?”

  
“This…the show. You don’t look like the type to want to be on a reality show.”

  
“I don’t. My publicist thought this would be good for my image. I’ve been accused of being a recluse. This is supposed to show the readers that I’m a real human.”

  
Dean laughed. “I guess this show will do that all right.”

  
“I’ve never watched it, so I wouldn’t know.” He sat down on a large rock and slipped his feet into the water. Dean lowered himself and dipped his toe into the cool water. He was beginning to think Sam’s shoe choice was a good idea. He didn’t even have to remove them.

  
“So, you’ve never watched the show and you really don’t want to be here. That’s going to suck for our tribe.”

  
“Why should my lack of knowledge and desire to be here affect the tribe?”

  
Dean gave him his best ‘duh’ look, but it didn’t seem to faze the man. “I want to win this game. A team is only as good as its weakest member. If you don’t care, then that makes you our weakest link.”

  
“I never said I didn’t care, Dean. I would never intentionally let my team down.” Damned if he didn’t look insulted by Dean’s observation.

  
“Then we’re cool?” Dean held out his fist and Castiel stared at it. Dean reached down and took Castiel’s hand and formed it into a fist. He bumped it playfully.

  
“It’s called a fist bump. People use it to…well…it’s like a high five.”

  
“Oh. I see.”

  
They talked about Castiel’s books until the sun rose. The other members of their tribe began to move around. For breakfast, they ate breadfruit and more of the star fruit. Dean and Benny both took turns trying to light the fire. Garth’s method of rubbing two sticks wasn’t working for them either.

  
The Upolu tribe spent the day renovating their shelter. They created a platform to get them off the ground. It was long enough so they could all lie down side by side. It was a tight fit, but Dean planned on situating himself between Jo and Lisa that night. The film crew was unobtrusive and after a while, Dean forgot they were even there. He and Charlie took off to explore and when the got back, everyone was gathered around Castiel.

  
As they got closer they saw that Castiel was dripping wet. He was holding a bunch of clams in his hands. Dean had to rethink his strategy. His plan was to make everyone rely on him to bring food. He wanted to be the tribe’s most valuable player, so he wouldn’t be voted out.

  
That first day, the tribe spent time sitting around and learning about each other. Dean found out that Lisa was a single mom. Benny married his high school sweetheart and Charlie was a huge geek.

  
Both Jo and Lisa stayed close to Dean, flirting outrageously with him. He might make a move on one or both of them once it was dark. The cameras ran all the time, but he’d seen the show enough times to know you could find some private time. Castiel…or Cas as Dean called him in his head…spent his time observing everyone instead of talking. Once or twice, Dean looked up to find those intense blue eyes on him. It made him feel like he was under a microscope.

  
They each had a clam for lunch that day. A raw clam. Garth said it was like really bad sushi. Dean gagged his down and watched in awe as Cas swallowed his whole. Benny laughed and said Dean should have swallowed his like an oyster instead of trying to chew it. Now they tell him.

  
After only two days into the game, Dean was sweaty, covered in bug bites and dirty. As the late afternoon sun began to sink, he removed his shirt and waded into the lagoon. The water was pretty clear and he dove under a few times to explore. He’d hoped to find some sort of sea life to bring up, but he waited too long and the sun wasn’t bright enough to trickle down to the bottom.

  
Dinner was more fruit and coconut. Dean, used to eating three squares a day, was starving. His body wasn’t used to the fruit and he made use of the latrine Garth dug several times that afternoon.

  
Without anything to keep them occupied, the tribe got as comfortable as they could once it was dark. Lisa and Jo put themselves on either side of Dean and he hid his smile. Things were looking up. Before he could think of a way to ‘accidently’ touch the girls, he fell into an exhausted sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

Dean woke to the sounds of birds and what sounded like a locomotive. He rubbed his hands over his face, trying to clear the sleep. He sat up. He was alone in the lean-to with Garth, who was snoring loud enough to shake the bamboo flooring.

  
Most of his tribe were sitting on the palm tree log they’d rolled up to the camp yesterday. Cas and Benny were missing. He ambled over to the unlit fire and picked up a piece of breadfruit that was in the pot. There were mumblings that sounded like ‘morning’, but Dean couldn’t be sure.

  
Benny came striding into camp holding up a thick piece of bamboo with carving on it. “We have tree mail.” Everyone gathered around.

  
**_“A quest for fire…for warmth, for cooking, for light._**

**_Through water you must go and fight.”_ **

  
They discussed the possible scenarios for the challenge that awaited them with more enthusiasm than they’d had since the first day.

  
“Whoa,” Anna said softly, looking towards the lagoon. Everyone turned. Cas was coming out of the water, more clams in his hands. He was shirtless and Dean couldn’t help but notice he was built pretty good for someone who sat around and wrote books for a living. He also saw how the women of his tribe were looking at the author. He wasn’t used to being jealous and it wasn’t a nice feeling. What really pissed him off was that he wasn’t sure if he was mad because the women weren’t looking at him anymore or that they were looking at Cas like they wanted to throw the man on the ground and molest the poor guy.

  
Oblivious to the women’s stares, Cas held out clams for everyone. “I found a few lobsters too. Once we have fire, I think I could catch a few.”

  
Dean made it his goal to catch lobsters before Cas did. He didn’t bother taking a clam.

  
A handler walked into camp a few minutes later and told everyone to follow him to the site of the first challenge. They hiked back to the beach where they first landed. Out in the water, Dean could see two platforms painted blue and red respectively. They were set about a hundred yards out. On the platforms was a metal cauldron with flames coming out of it. Jeff stood on the beach. The red tribe was already there.

  
“The tribe that wins this challenge will get fire. Fire is one of the most important parts of survival. You will line up and take turns swimming to the platform. You will haul yourself out of the water, pick up a torch and light it. You must swim back with the torch. Whichever team has the most burning torches at the end of the challenge wins a reward and fire. The losing team will face Tribal Council and one of you will be the first person voted off.”

  
The two teams huddled together for a minute before taking their places. Dean suggested the strongest swimmers bring up the rear. Everyone agreed that Cas, Benny and Dean would swim last.

  
“Go,” Jeff called out and Garth hit the water at the same time the bitchy brunette from the Savaii did. She made it to the platform first and lit her torch. She got back t the beach and the short guy obsessed with food ran in. Garth made it back and stuck his torch into the sand. Jo set off.

  
It was neck and neck when Dean hit the water. Lisa had let her torch go under water and so had the lady cop. When he reached the platform, he looked over and saw that the FBI agent was a few yards behind him. He got his torch lit and headed for shore. It was harder than it looked. He had to rely on his strong legs and one arm to make it back. Benny was next. He was halfway back when his torch slipped under. Dean could tell the big Cajun was pissed at himself. Dean slapped him on the back. Cas was already swimming strong.

  
The red tribe was behind, but what mattered most was the number of torches. Upolu had five lit torches. Cas’ would make it six. The other tribe had five lit torches as well. Dean was nervous. The factory worker was almost to shore with a lit torch. Dean clinched his fists. He had a sinking feeling they were going to lose. Suddenly, the man tripped and his torch went out just inches from shore. Once again they were even.

  
The college kid was a strong swimmer. Cas was at the platform. Dean began to chant, “Come on…come on…come on…” Cas lowered himself to the water, torch held high in the air. He kicked off and headed in. The kid was pulling himself up. Cas jammed the torch into the sand and the tribe engulfed him in a impromptu group hug. Side by side, they waited.

  
As the young man lowered himself into the water, his hand slipped and he went under, taking the torch with him. Upolu cheered. The red tribe was silent while they waited until their last tribe member swam to shore.

  
“Upolu, you are the winner.” Jeff walked towards them with a burlap bag. “Your reward…fishing gear, a mask and a snorkel.” He handed the bag to Garth. “Take a torch and head back to your camp. Savaii, one of you will be going home at Tribal Council.”  
Back at their camp, Garth made short work of starting the fire. Cas and Benny spread the contents of the bag on the bamboo floor of their lean-to. Dean grinned as they took out not only fishing line, a mask and snorkel, but also a box of waterproof matches. To be on the safe side, the tribe decided to keep the matches and extra hooks in the bag suspended from the top of the shelter.

  
With a fire going, Cas suggested that he take the mask and snorkel and see if he could round up a few of the lobsters. Benny and Dean took the fishing line and tied it to two bamboo poles. “What are we going to use as bait?” Dean asked, frowning.

  
“I could probably follow Cas out and see where he found the clams. We could use those, couldn’t we?” asked Jo, already removing her t-shirt to show a turquoise colored bikini top under it. Dean, Benny and Garth all stared unabashed at the woman’s figure. Charlie and Anna chuckled at their reaction. Lisa just frowned.

  
Dean shook himself out of it and nodded. “Yeah, we could use ‘em. I can go with you, Jo.”

  
In the end, Lisa joined them too, after revealing her bright pink bikini. Dean came to the surface with three clams and used a rock to crack the shells. Benny took the machete and cut them in half. Once the two girls got back, they had enough to use as bait.  
While Benny stayed close to camp, Dean wandered around the edge of the lagoon until he found a shadowy overhang. He remembered fishing with his Uncle Bobby and knew this place might be lucky. Once he was settled onto a flat rock and the hook was in the water, he had time to think about the challenge. His entire tribe did great. So, they didn’t get all the torches, accidents happened. If he had to pick someone to go home at that instant, he’d be hard pressed to choose.

  
From where he sat, he could see the open water of the lagoon and the mouth opening into the ocean. It really was beautiful here. He narrowed his eyes against the glare of the late afternoon sun and saw a dark head appear close to the waterfall. He was ready to wave when he felt a tug on the line. With a quick yank, he set the hook and stood up. The fish wasn’t huge, but Dean figured it was a good three or four pounds.

  
“A grouper.” Dean looked up, startled. Cas was treading water about ten yards out. Since Dean’s fishing experience was mostly about fresh water fish, he couldn’t argue. Cas gave him a smile. “I’ve got a lobster.” He held the large crustacean out of the water for Dean to admire.

  
“Cool. How come it doesn’t have claws?” It didn’t look like the lobsters Dean had seen in the aquariums at the Red Lobster restaurants.

  
“It’s a Palinuridae.” At Dean’s questioning look, Cas said, “Or spiny lobster.”

  
“How come you know so much about fish and stuff?” Dean asked curiously. Cas swam closer until he could perch on a partly submerged rock.

  
“I have a degree in Marine Biology.” Dean took in Cas’ bare chest and the beads of water leaving rivulets down his tanned skin. He wondered what it would be like to lick the salty trails…

  
“Oh…cool…uhm…so, how did a marine biology start writing books about angels?”

  
Cas shrugged. “I wrote the first book my senior year of high school. It was just to have something to do mostly. Once I got to Boston University, I’d forgotten about it until one of my English professors told us to write a short story. I was in the middle of some family drama and didn’t have time for the assignment, so I pulled it out and doctored it up a little. The professor liked it and advised me to send it to a few publishers and the rest is history.”

  
“That’s kind of awesome, Cas. High school, huh? In high school, I was barely passing and working five days a week to support my brother.” Dean hadn’t meant to say all that. His game strategy was to keep as much about his private life off of national television as he could. The cameraman that followed him was only a few feet away.

  
“Where were your parents?” Dean cut his eyes to the cameraman and understanding dawned in Cas’ eyes. “Hey, you going to throw that hook in the water or do you expect us all to eat that one poor fish.”

  
Dean smiled in appreciation. Cas was actually a really cool guy. “You’ve probably scared away all the fish by flopping around on that rock,” he retorted. Cas laughed and slid back into the water. He disappeared under the water, but the smile on Dean’s face remained for a long time.

  
That evening, Anna cooked a pot of rice and they had grilled fish and lobster. It was the first real meal they’d had since they landed on the beach. All of them sat around the fire afterwards, bellies full, talking and making jokes. Garth lamented on the red tribe’s fate.

  
“I guess I kind of feel sorry for them. Without fire, they can’t even make rice.”

  
“That means they’ll be hungry and weak during the next challenge. We can kick their ass again,” Lisa said smugly. Dean’s smile was forced. He liked the idea of beating the other tribe, but not because they are starving.

  
Darkness fell and one by one, the survivors lay on the bamboo platform that was their bed. This time, Dean positioned himself on the other side of Jo, away from Lisa. He didn’t exactly plan it that way, or maybe he subconsciously did. He didn’t dwell on it. On the other side of him was Charlie. As soft snores and even breathing competed with the sounds of the rain forest, Dean was still awake.

  
“Hey.”

  
Dean turned towards Charlie’s whisper. “Yeah?”

  
“I’ve been thinking…you’re a strong player and so is Castiel and Benny. Do you think we should form an alliance?”

  
Dean, who was a fan of the show, laughed softly. “Isn’t it a bit early to form an alliance?”

  
“It’s never too early,” she murmured.

  
“I suppose you’re right. I’m okay with it, but what about Jo? She’s in shape and seems to be pretty smart.”

  
“Maybe. Let’s not say anything to anyone until after the next challenge.”

  
“Deal,” Dean agreed and Charlie held out her littlest finger. “What’s that?”

  
“Pinkie swear.”

  
He smirked and curled his pinkie around Charlie’s.

  
The tribe had two days to cool their heels until the next challenge. They were eating pretty good and it seemed like the men, Jo and Charlie were the ones that got things done. Garth took it upon himself to tend the fire while Charlie and Jo made sure the canteens were filled. Dean and Benny went fishing and Cas kept them in bait and lobster or an occasional crab.

  
On the day the red tribe went to the first tribal council, the whole blue tribe hiked around the lagoon to the beach. They searched the shoreline for anything edible or useful for their camp. Wading in knee deep water, Dean found a conch. “Yo, Cas, edible?”

  
“Yes.” As soon as Cas answered, the others began wading out. No one else found one though. Cas showed them a sea urchin. “If we get a few of these, we can boil them and make a soup that’s high in protein.”

  
Benny found a large, smooth rock to use as a cooking stone and the four men took turns carrying it back to camp. Dinner was a soup made with the sea urchins, the conch and a bit of lobster thrown in with some rice. Dean felt confident they had an edge in the next challenge.

  
Lisa came out of the jungle from the direction of the latrine with the bamboo mail tube. “Hey, everyone, we got tree mail.” They all gathered around her.

  
**_“Mired down on a slippery slope,_ **   
**_Your power holds the rope.”_ **

  
“A tug of war?” Dean thought out loud.

  
“Yeah. Could be,” Benny said with a nod.

  
Cas walked into the jungle a short time later and Dean noticed he wasn’t heading in the right direction to take a piss. He stood up and followed. The three cameramen assigned to them were focused on other members of the tribe. Garth and Benny were adding more leaves to the roof of the lean-to. Anna was showing Lisa and Jo her infected mosquito bites. And Charlie, who was down at the edge of the lagoon cleaning their rice pot. He slipped away unnoticed.

  
He found Cas near a small clearing, leaning against a tree. “How’s it going?”

  
Cas looked up. Dean saw the other man look behind him. “The cameras are busy with everyone else.”

  
“That’s good. I feel like we are in a cage at the zoo.”

  
“The bio on the back of your books don’t give out too much information about you? Married? Kids?”

  
“No to both questions. My brother has twin girls, that’s as close as I’ve gotten.”

  
“Just one brother?”

  
“Yes. My twin. His name is James…Jimmy. He’s my only family. My parents are deceased.”

  
“About our conversation yesterday, my mom died when I was little. Sam, my brother, was only a baby. Dad didn’t take it well…fuck, who would? He started drinking a lot, stayed gone…showed up at the department for his shift and didn’t bother coming home afterwards. Not sure where the money went. He came home enough to pay a few bills…the mortgage…the utilities…he’d toss me a few twenties for food. My job paid for Sammy’s clothes, stuff he needed for school…food was fuckin’ expensive…anyway… he was a good firefighter before my mom died and his crew basically carried him until he reached retirement age. He signed the house over to me, packed his shit and moved to Kansas with some tramp he was fucking. Thanks for steering away from that. I don’t want crap like that to be on TV, you know?”

  
“I understand. My parents died when Jimmy and I were sophomores in college. Dad left my mother and a month later we found out he was killed in a car accident. My mother sunk into a depression when he left and when she got the news, she…” He turned away from Dean, staring off into the jungle. “…she killed herself.”

  
“Fuck, man…I’m sorry.”

  
“She checked out of my life long before that. She didn’t want a gay kid. She told people she only had one son.”

  
Dean was still trying to wrap his brain around Cas’ confession about being gay, but he managed to mumble, “That’s fucked up.”

  
Cas huffed out a small laugh. “Enough of that, what would you do with the million dollars, if you won?”

  
Dean grinned. “Pay off Sam’s student loans, pay of the second mortgage the old man put on the house…give Sam enough to hang out his own shingle and maybe do some renovations on the house.”

  
“No new car, fancy homes, round the world trips?”

  
“Nope, that kind of life isn’t for me. I’ll stay with the fire department and as long as I have enough for a six pack of beer on the weekend, I’m happy.”

  
“You are definitely not what you seem, Dean,” Cas said with a tilt of his head.

  
“Hey, don’t think I’m some goody-two-shoes. I want to win this thing, not only for the money, but because I’m a competitive bastard.” Dean grinned.

  
“We should probably get back before they send out a search party,” Cas said, straightening.

  
“Yeah, guess so.” Dean led the way back into camp. Cas was still a stranger to him, but Dean felt drawn to the man for some reason.

  
There was a handler waiting for them. He met them as they came out of the jungle. “Please don’t wander off alone again. We like to keep the cameras on the entire tribe, not to mention no one knew where you were.”

  
“Sorry about that,” Dean said, not really meaning it.


	3. Chapter 3

Dean slept fitfully. He was hungry, even though they were probably eating a lot better than the red tribe. He was tired. A bunch of bamboo pieced together to form a floor was not comfortable at all. He had just rolled over to try sleeping on his back when he felt raindrops hit his feet. Sitting up, he looked out into the darkness. The camera crew, only one camera and one boom guy for the late night shift, were wearing foul weather gear and the equipment had protective housings. He supposed they got a heads up from the weather service.

  
The rain picked up and beat on the lean-to’s roof, waking the others. They all huddled to the back of the structure, but Dean could feel drops of water coming through.

  
“This bites,” Dean muttered.

  
“We need to come up with a better shelter,” Benny said.

  
They bitched and moaned until the sun rose. Cas was the first to venture out into the downpour. He said he was going to get fruit for their breakfast and Dean scrambled up to help. Jo followed him and the trio hiked into the jungle. Rain pelting down on the heads and backs. A second camera crew had arrived and they trailed them. They found a few coconuts that had blown down and Dean let Jo stand on his shoulders to get the few remaining star fruit on the small tree. The only good thing about the trip was that Dean got to see one of Cas’ rare smiles. Jo was leading them back when her flip flop sank into the mud and she walked completely out of it. She turned around and looked so forlorn when she said, “I’ve lost my shoe.” Dean couldn’t help it, he laughed. The corner of Cas’ mouth came up just enough to qualify it to be a smile.

  
By midmorning, morale was at a low. The women were bitching at each other about whose turn it was to go get water. Benny bitched because the latrine needed to be moved and no one wanted to take the job. Finally, Dean had enough. He snatched up the shovel and marched off. The rain had slacked off a little, but he was miserable. Strangely enough, he was cold. Sam had told him that the average temperature during the day at that time of year was about eighty-seven degrees, and seventy-five or so at night. With the rain, Dean thought it was probably a lot cooler.

  
He made sure the area they used as a bathroom was properly covered with sand and leaves before clearing another area. The hole was about a foot deep when Cas showed up. “I can take over.”

  
“I got it,” Dean snapped.

  
Cas shrugged and turned to go. Dean felt like an ass. “Wait.” Cas stopped and tilted his head. “Look, I’m sorry…I’m cold, hungry and tired and that makes me cranky.”

  
“It’s okay, Dean.” Cas kicked away some of the debris around the hole. He waited patiently for Dean to finish, neither man spoke in front of the cameraman.

  
After they got back, their tribe’s handler arrived. “Let’s go, people. Follow me.”

  
They were lead down the path towards the beach and a flatbed truck waited on them. They climbed on, with Dean sitting next to Cas. He tried not to notice their bare thighs were touching. The truck ride was bumpy and they were jostled from side to side as the vehicle made its way over rough terrain. It was roughly a ten minute ride, but to Dean’s ass, it felt like hours.

  
When they broke out of the jungle into a large clearing, Dean saw what looked like an obstacle course, but the ground was a mud bog. He looked down at his t-shirt. It was a bit dirty, but you could still tell it was white.

  
The blue tribe got their first look at the red tribe since the last challenge. They had voted off the bitchy brunette.

  
Jeff stood by the start of the course and the two tribes assembled around him. The rain was more of a steady drizzle now. “Today’s challenge is to make it through this obstacle course before the other tribe. Sounds pretty easy, right? To make it a bit harder, you will be tied together with three feet of rope separating you from your teammates.”

  
A few groans could be heard from both tribes. “You’ve experienced the rain and you’re all probably wet and miserable. The winning team will get…” Dean uncovered a pile at his feet. “…two large tarps to use to keep the rain off of you. The losing team will go to tribal council. Upolu, you will need to pick a player to sit this one out. You have two minutes to strategize. Any questions?”

  
Dean’s tribe huddled together. “Anna should sit this one out,” Lisa said.

  
“I may be a teacher, but I’ve been doing Crossfit for two years,” Anna retorted. Dean’s eyebrow rose, but he didn’t contradict her.

  
Charlie spoke up, “Look, guys, I’m the smallest and I sit at a computer all day. I’ll sit out.” Dean knew that Charlie wasn’t as weak as she made out. Was this part of her strategy?

  
The rest of their time was spent figuring out the order they should go in. Charlie was the one who came up with the plan. “It should be boy, girl, boy, girl…that way, the guys can use their upper body strength to help the girls, if needed.”

  
The men agreed and Benny was the first to go. He hit the slip and slid hard with Jo hot on his ass. Dean watched Jo’s ass as she ducked under the first wire in the crawling area. He followed her, army crawling on his stomach. The sloped wooden wall proved to be difficult. Garth had to be pulled up and over by his tribemates because by the time it was his turn, the boards were covered in mud and too slick for any traction. Dean took a second to look at Savaii, they were neck and neck. “Come on, Guys,” he shouted.

  
The next obstacle was a huge cargo net they had to climb over. Cas lost his footing and took down Lisa, losing a few seconds, but Dean reached down and gripped his hand and pulled him up. Savaii moved ahead. They had to sprint fifty yards to the eight foot wall. Garth was the last over the wall and they stumbled to the finish line, a mere fifteen seconds ahead of Savaii.

  
“Dean, you’re bleeding,” Cas said, concern making his voice huskier. Dean reached a dirty hand to his forehead. He remembered hitting it on the framework that helped suspend the cargo net.

  
“It’s nothing,” he said, slinging his arm around Cas. “We won.”

 

Upolu was jubilant. Jeff walked up to them and handed Charlie the two tarps. “Congratulations Upolu. Two challenges in a row. You can head back to camp. Savaii, I’ll see you at tribal council.”

  
At the truck, their handler inspected Dean’s face and announced they would be stopping at the first aid tent to get it cleaned and looked at.

  
The blue tribe stayed on the truck while Dean was led over to the tent marked with a large red cross. The mud was drying on his skin and he felt nasty and itchy. A burly guy with a long beard cleaned around the wound and told Dean he wouldn’t need stitches. That was a relief. Dean hissed as the man poured hydrogen peroxide into the cut. “Motherfu…”

  
The man laughed. “I’ve heard worse.”

  
Ten minutes later, Dean crawled up into the truck, a white butterfly bandage stark white on his filthy face. He sat in the open space next to Cas.

  
Back at camp, Dean lost all sense of modesty and shucked down to his boxer briefs. He dove into the lagoon and washed off as best as he could. The others were in the water around him. He waded out and grabbed his clothes for a quick rinse.

  
The wood was wet and so a fire was out of the question. Their clothing was hung from tree limbs to dry. The girls were all down to their bikinis and the men were either in their underwear or their shorts. In only six days, Dean could see weight loss on most of his tribe. His boxer briefs were loose at the waist. He had wanted to take off a few pounds and it looks like he was getting his wish.

  
It was a cold and uncomfortable night, but Benny and Garth had secured the tarps over their lean-to and the Upolu tribe would stay dry. Without fire, the tribe ate coconut and breadfruit. Dean hoped the next day would be nice enough to dry out some wood.  
The next morning, the handler came to take them, one by one, to a secluded area for their ‘confession’ time. Dean went after Lisa. They placed him on a large rock with the waterfall in the background.

  
“Okay, Dean. I’m going to ask a few questions off camera and you are going to just talk.”

  
Dean nodded. “No problem.”

  
“You’ve won the first two challenges and seemed to be in sync. Is there anyone in your tribe that you would label a troublemaker?”

  
Frowning, Dean rubbed his hand over his jaw. “We all get along. Anna and Lisa seem to have a ‘thing’. Not sure what you’d call it. They just stay pissy at each other. As far as a troublemaker…if I had to pick someone, it would be Lisa. She can be a bitch.”

  
“Has there been any talk of an alliance yet?”

  
“It’s still early in the game, but a few of us are pretty tight.”

  
Back at camp, the handler took Charlie and Dean nodded to Cas. “Want to go to the beach and see if we can find some driftwood for the fire?” He asked softly because for some reason, he didn’t want anyone else to go.

  
“Sure.” Cas stood and brushed the sand off his butt. His shorts were sagging a bit and his hipbones were prominent. Dean wouldn’t mind leaving his mark on them. He shook his head…he just needed to get laid. Only thirty-two days to go. The more he got to know Jo and Lisa, the more he knew no strings sex was out of the question.

  
Down at the beach, the camera walked about five feet behind them and the boom was held on an extended pole directly above their heads. They walked in silence for a long time, stopping to pick up small pieces of wood on occasion.

  
“Charlie wants you, me and Benny to be in the merge.”

  
“I’m flattered,” Cas said, sounding really surprised.

  
“Why? Cas, you’re a strong player. You swim fast and you can run like a motherfucker.” Dean saw a pink tinge to Cas’ face and grinned.

  
“I was on the swim team at Boston U. I still try to swim as much as I can at the Y. I run most mornings too. Being a writer is pretty sedentary, but I try to keep in shape.” Cas bent down to pick up a shell. He examined it while they walked and Dean saw him put it in his pocket.

  
“Gotta stay in shape for Mr. Right, huh?” Dean wasn’t quite sure why he asked Cas that.

  
“I’m not a great judge when it comes to who will be Mr. Right,” Cas mumbled softly.

  
“We’ve all made some pretty poor choices in the romance department, Cas,” Dean said, remembering Cassie. She was the only woman he ever thought about having a future with. Unfortunately, she couldn’t handle his career. She was always worrying about him dying on the job. Eventually, she left him and a year later, she married a doctor. Dean would think long and hard before getting serious again.

  
“We should head back,” Cas suggested.

  
They turned around and started the trek back to camp. Everyone looked up when they came down the path. From some of the looks they got, Dean thought his tribe must have thought they plotted world domination while they were looking for firewood.  
Benny and Garth had gotten a few fish for dinner and they ate it with rice. As soon as they finished eating, Dean left for the latrine. He was almost there when he heard someone behind him. The rules were that cameras couldn’t go to that area and only one player at a time could venture there. He stopped and waited for whomever it was to catch up. Lisa came up the path. Her bikini would never be the same after the mud bath it took. She had her buff wrapped around her breasts. “You always seem to be with Castiel or Charlie and I wanted to get you alone.”

  
Dean hoped that didn’t mean what he thought it meant. “We aren’t really alone now, Lisa.” Dean indicated the camera’s red light glowing behind her.

  
“You know what I mean,” she brushed the thought of the camera off with a wave of her hand.

  
“No, not really.” After a week out there, the cameras went unnoticed by the tribe most of the time now, but Dean still was leery about what he said and did.

  
“I want to make it to the final three. I think you and I could do it if we stick together.”

  
“Lisa, it’s too early in the game to be planning shit about the final three. At this point, we all just need to worry about making it to the merge.” He wasn’t about to tell her about Charlie’s ideas for an alliance.

  
She turned to smirk at the cameraman and stepped forward, putting her face within inches of Dean’s. She whispered, “I’ll make it worth your while. We can find a quiet place…”

  
Dean backed up. “Sorry, Lisa, I’m just not interested in having sex on camera. Now, I came out here for a reason.” Dean indicated the path to the latrine with his head.

  
The corner of her mouth lifted in a sneer. “I’m going to be in the final three, Dean. With or without you.”

  
“Good luck with that.” Dean tipped an imaginary hat at her and left her standing there. He would have to keep an eye on her. Anna had been their weakest link, but if Dean had to vote right then and there, he’d vote Lisa off the island in a heartbeat.

  
Back at camp, they sat around the fire and talked about home. During a lull in the conversation, Charlie asked the group, “What is the one thing you miss the most?”

  
Anna spoke first. “My husband.”

  
“No, Anna, a thing…like a food or drink or whatever,” Charlie clarified.

  
“Oh, in that case, pizza.” Everyone laughed. Charlie pointed to Garth.

  
“Uh, gosh, I’d have to say ice cream.”

  
“Beer,” Benny stated simply.

  
“I’ll second that,” Dean said with a grin.

  
“My bed,” Jo said dreamily. The rest of them moaned in appreciation. Dean did miss his memory foam mattress. It cost him an entire paycheck, but it remembered him and he loved it.

  
“My shower,” Lisa said, running her fingers through her tangled brown hair.

  
“What about you, Castiel?” Charlie asked.

  
Cas shrugged. “I’m not sure. Writing, I guess.”

  
“Are you going to write a book about this experience?” Jo inquired with a flirtatious smile.

  
“No.” Cas’ answer was short and left no room for more questions.

  
Wanting to be as far from Lisa as possible, Dean motioned for Charlie to go to the other end of the lean-to with him. Cas walked up and blinked at them. He looked back at the fire where the rest of their tribe still sat. “This is my spot,” he said softly.

  
Dean grinned up at him. “Don’t sweat it, Cas. I’ll move over.” Charlie shifted over a space and Dean followed, leaving the outer edge for Cas. Once Cas was settled next to him, the three speculated on who would be going home from Savaii until Charlie drifted off. “You okay, Cas?”

  
“Yes. Why?”

  
“You acted a bit upset by Jo’s question.”

  
“No…not really…I just couldn’t write about real life. It’s bad enough it’s going to be broadcast to the masses.”

  
“Speaking of which, you won’t believe this…Lisa pretty much asked me to do her.”

  
“Don’t you think she’s pretty?”

  
“Fuck, yeah, she’s hot…well, at least she was the first day. Hairy pits and legs is kind of a turn off. I thought about tapping that on the first day, but now…I wouldn’t touch that pussy with a ten foot pole.”

  
“Jo is quite beautiful and she’s nice, in a scary way.”

  
“Jo’s cool. The more I get to know her though, it’s like she’s…like a little sister…crazy, right? What about you…you think Benny’s hot?”

  
Cas snorted. “I think Benny would break me in half.”

  
“So, Garth then?”

  
“I would break him in half,” Cas said dryly and Dean had to muffle his laughter.

  
“So, Benny’s too big and Garth is too small. Who is just right, Goldilocks?” Dean wasn’t asking for a compliment…he wasn’t flirting…or was he?

  
“Go to sleep, Dean,” Cas said gruffly and rolled to his side, facing away from Dean.

  
While Savaii spent the day preparing for tribal council, Upolu gathered food and lounged around their camp. Anna and Garth seemed to have hit it off and they spent time talking quietly. Lisa remained aloft and observant. Whenever a couple or group wandered off, she followed closely behind. Dean saw her pull different people aside and talk to them privately.

  
Later in the afternoon, Charlie, Benny, Cas and Dean found themselves near the waterfall. “Lisa approached me about being with her in the final three,” Benny remarked casually.

  
“Yeah, me too,” Charlie said. She looked expectantly at Dean and Cas.

  
“Yep,” Dean responded.

  
Cas shook his head. “She has not talked to me.”

  
“Just wait,” Charlie said, frowning as the woman they were talking about came up to them.

  
“Hello, everyone.”

  
“Lisa,” Benny nodded politely.

  
“Anna, Garth and Jo went to see if the tree mail is there yet.”

  
“We should head back then,” Charlie suggested and Dean was glad they wouldn’t have to talk to the woman.

  
Jo waved the bamboo tube at them when the emerged from the jungle. The tribe quickly gathered around.

  
**_“A foot outside the circle gets you wet,_**  
**_One falls down, all will regret.”_**

  
Late into the evening, the tribe tried to make sense of the rhyme.


	4. Chapter 4

Their eighth morning on the island was clear and hot. Dean woke early and nudged Cas. “Come on, let’s go get some fish for breakfast,” he whispered. With the next challenge that day, Dean wanted his tribe well fed. Or at least, as well fed as they could get.  
Cas dove in and found a few small shrimp they could use as bait and then they hiked over to Dean’s favorite fishing hole. In less than a half hour, they had two nice sized fish. Benny and Garth were tending the fire when they got back. All of the women were still asleep. Dean cleaned the fish and cooked them quickly. “Should we wake the girls?”asked Garth.

“Nope, let ‘em sleep,” Dean suggested. The four of them ate half the fish, leaving the rest for the girls. Benny cracked a few coconuts and they drink the liquid inside. 

It was close to noon when the handler came into camp. “Let’s go. You will need to take the path down to the beach and walk until you get to the outcropping of rocks. Jeff will be waiting.” 

While the handler disappeared down the path that Dean now knew led to the first aid tent and crew’s camp, the Upolu tribe began their trek.

The outcropping of rock came into view and Dean saw a round platform in the water. There was a floating dock leading past it to join a large, wooden deck where he could see Jeff and a few crew members.

“The older woman is gone,” Jo said, indicating the Savaii tribe that was coming out of the jungle further down the beach.

Handlers steered the two tribes down the dock and onto the larger deck.

“Upolu, you are now looking at the new Savaii tribe. Naomi asked to leave and so they were given a reprieve from the tribal council,” Jeff informed them.

Dean knew a few people from past seasons have asked to just leave because they couldn’t hack it. Seemed like a waste to him. They’d have to vote his ass off, he wasn’t leaving for nothing. 

“This challenge is about strength and agility. Two members of opposing tribes will swim out to the platform. You will wrestle, sumo style, until one of you goes in the water. Whichever tribe has the most wins will go away today with…” Jeff pointed to the beach where a jeep was sitting. “…pillows and blankets for everyone.”

Dean couldn’t help the moan. So far, the worst part about his entire stay was the lack of sleep due to the hard sleeping surface. He didn’t think his back would ever be the same.

“Upolu, as winners of the last challenge, you will pick your first opponent and then the winning team from then on, picks who they go up against until everyone has been on the platform. You will have to sit out two players, both female. You’ve got thirty seconds to pick those sitting out and who is up first for your tribe.”

The blue tribe huddled together quickly. Dean automatically took the leadership role. “Charlie sat out last time, so we need to pick two others. Jo, you’re the smallest next to Charlie and Anna, you okay with sitting out?” 

Anna and Jo both nodded their agreement. “Okay, who’s going first?” Benny asked.

“I think we should send out you first and you can pick the black guy. He looks like he’s in decent shape. You think you can take him?”

“Time’s up, Upolu. Who is sitting out?”

“Anna and I,” Jo answered. The two women moved to stand behind Jeff.

“And who is up first.” Benny stepped forward with his hand raised. “Who are you going to pick to oppose you, Benny?”

Benny pointed. “Alright, Victor. Both of you swim to the platform and put on the belts. On my mark, you will try to push the other off the platform. Go.”

Benny and Victor dove in and seconds later they were pulling themselves up onto the round platform. The blue and red belts were made of thick webbing and clipped around their waists. Dean watched as the two men sized each other up. Benny was slightly bigger, but Dean seemed to remember the other guy was a FBI agent. He probably knew how to fight. Sure enough, in less than a minute, Benny was in the water.

“Fuck,” Dean mumbled. 

Cas put a hand on his shoulder. “Dean, I don’t think I’ll be good at this.”

Dean chucked him under his chin. “Don’t sweat it. Just do the best you can.”

The dark haired woman that Dean remembered was a dancer was up next and she picked Charlie. Charlie may have been small, but the girl was scrappy. Charlie took the victory. 

Garth took out the college student easily and Dean sent Lisa up next. She lost to the police officer. Dean knew that was going to happen, but there wasn’t anything he could do about it. The nice looking guy stepped up and pointed to Dean. 

Dripping wet from the swim to the platform, Dean fastened the blue belt around his waist. He gave the other man a shit eating grin. “Ready for another swim?”

“Big talk for someone who is getting ready to go down.” Just as Jeff gave the signal, he looked at Dean and said, “Semper Fi.” 

Dean hit the water before his head had wrapped around the fact that the guy must have been a fuckin’ Marine.

Fuming Dean hauled himself out of the water, the commiserating pat on the back from Benny didn’t help Dean’s mood. Their last tribe member was up, it was Cas versus the sawed off guy that was a bakery owner. Dean took Cas by the shoulders and looked into those pretty blue eyes. “You’ve got this Cas, he’s a lot smaller than you.”

The shorter man turned out to be fast and easy on his feet. He played Cas like a violin and Cas was out of the game in less than a minute.

“Savaii will celebrate their first victory with a comfortable night sleep. Red tribe, take your pillows and blankets back to your camp. Upolu, I will see you at tribal council.”

The walk back was tense. No one spoke. They got their asses handed to them and Dean felt like he was shouldering the blame. Who knew the factory worker from Philadelphia had been a Marine? Dean was in shape, a firefighter for Christ’s sake, but he wasn’t a match for a Marine.

Everyone was on edge. Cas, Benny and Dean took the fishing gear and went down to the beach to try to catch something for dinner. Garth and Charlie walked into the jungle to collect firewood and the other girls stayed at the camp.

They had one day to come up with who they wanted to leave the island. Dean knew what his vote would be, but after today’s fiasco, any of them that landed in the water could be on the chopping block. “It could be any of us,” Benny said, reading his thoughts.

“Yeah,” Dean agreed. They were out in hip deep water. Cas snorkeled off a few minutes earlier. “I’m still leaning towards Lisa.”

“You and me both.”

The next day, everyone seemed to be having secretive conversations and it kept the camera crews busy. It was time for their confessions again and when it was Dean’s turn, he was taken to the beach and posed on a large piece of driftwood, the ocean in the background.

“How did it feel to lose after back to back wins?”

Dean snorted. “How did it feel to lose? How do you think it fuckin’ felt? I was pissed off. I let my tribe down.”

“Your first tribal council is tomorrow afternoon. Is the tribe going to have an easy time picking someone to send home?”

“I’m not sure who is going home, to be honest. I know who I’m voting for, but it’s anyone guess at this point.”

After he got finished with his interview, he got ready to walk back, but saw running in the distance. He started walking along the water’s edge until Cas drew closer. “I can’t believe you have the energy to run, Cas.”

“I want to stay in shape,” Cas said, not even breathing hard. He jogged in place for a few seconds and then stopped. “Lisa and Anna approached me.”

“Anna? No way. I thought those two hated each other.”

“Apparently not. They want to vote you off first, because they think you are their strongest competition.”

“Fuck,” Dean exclaimed, running his fingers through his hair.

“You have nothing to be worried about, Dean.”

“I don’t know about that, Cas. No one is really safe in this game.”

“If you ever want to vote me off, will you promise to tell me first?” Cas kept his eyes forward, but Dean cut his eyes to look at the other man.

“I can’t see voting you off, Cas.”

“Nor I you, Dean.” Dean bumped his shoulder against Cas and they ambled slowly back towards camp, the cameraman following along behind him.

The next day at five, the truck was waiting to transport them to tribal council. Quietly, they walked up the bamboo bridge leading to the staging area. They were all carrying their small personal bag since one of them wouldn’t be coming back to camp. There was a large fire pit in the center and to the left were eight wooden crates. 

“Upolu, grab your torches, light them and take a seat.” Dean found the one with his name on it and took it to the crate next to where Cas already sat holding his own torch. Once everyone was seated, Jeff began his speech. “This tribe won the first two challenges, you’ve been eating good and seem to work well as a team. Is there any strife?

Charlie spoke up. “There is some drama among the women, but mostly we get along really great.”

“Any issues with the men?” Jeff seemed to be looking right at Dean. Dean shook his head. “No, we’re good.”

“Dean thinks we’re good…he likes everyone hanging on his every word,” Lisa said snidely. Dean frowned at her.

“So, Dean is your leader?” Jeff asked. Dean knew Jeff wanted to make dramatic television, but he didn’t appreciate being put on the spot.

“Dean is a strong and smart guy, but I don’t think we think of him as the leader. We really don’t have a true leader. So far, we’ve worked great together as a team,” Benny said, making Dean feel better.

After that, Jeff gave them the instructions about voting and then one by one, they walked off to a secluded area.

Dean took the marker and wrote Lisa’s name on the thick paper. He held it up to the camera. “Lisa, no hard feelings.” He folded the paper in half and put it into the tiki shaped container. 

By the time everyone had gone to vote, Dean’s ass was going to sleep. Finally, Jeff brought the tiki jar up to the podium. “I’ll read the votes.”

“First vote, Anna.” Anna looked down at her fingers, lips pursed. 

“Lisa.” Dean knew he didn’t write that one, by the looks of things, a woman did. Lisa looked angry.

“Lisa.” That one wasn’t Dean’s handwriting either.

“Dean.” Dean turned his gaze to Lisa, she met it full on, chin in air. Arrogant bitch, Dean thought.

“Lisa. Three votes Lisa.” Jeff reached in to pull out another fold piece of paper. 

“Dean.” So, Lisa did get Anna to vote with her, or maybe someone else did it. 

“Lisa.” Dean did some quick math. Jeff must have done same math because he looked right at Lisa. “The second person voted off Survivor: Upolu, and the third to leave, Lisa. Lisa, bring me your torch.” Lisa stood and brought her torch up to Jeff. 

“Lisa, the tribe has spoken.” And he snuffed out her torch. She didn’t even spare the tribe a look as she sauntered down the bridge. Dean knew that she really wasn’t leaving. Eliminated players were kept sequestered until the final three. Lisa would have a vacation in Pago Pago until then.

Jeff looked at the camera instead of the tribe and said, “Upolu, take your torches back to camp.”

In the truck again, Jo leaned forward. “Well, I’m glad she’s gone.”

The tribe talked quietly until they got back to the path that would lead them to their camp. Dean noticed Anna hadn’t spoken a word. He knew she was wondering who voted for her. Dean wouldn’t mind the answer to that himself. He never spent much time with Anna, but he definitely didn’t trust the woman now.

As they walked single file down the trail, their torches lighting the way, Cas touched Dean’s arm and he hung back. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah. I knew Lisa and Anna were going to try to vote me out…just glad they didn’t succeed.”

“Me too,” Cas said softly. “You’ve been very kind to me.”

Dean looked at him in the firelight. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Even though being gay is more mainstream than it used to be, people…especially men, tend to…”

“You seriously thought I’d treat you differently because you came out to me? Way to hurt a guy, Cas.”

“I’m sorry…I didn’t mean…I just want to thank you for being my friend.”

“Dumbass,” Dean muttered, but his smile told Cas he was teasing. He could have taken the opportunity to tell Cas he was bi, but the cameraman was right next to them and Dean wasn’t about to announce it to the world. 

Tribal council was mentally trying for the tribe and everyone went to bed early. All but Cas and Dean. They sat by the fire talking. Dean found it was so easy to talk to him. He had a lot of questions about Cas’ books and Cas indulged him. Dean found Cas lacking in movie and music trivia though.

“What type of music do you listen to then?” Dean asked incredulously.

“I love piano and violin concertos.” Dean looked at him blankly. Cas smiled shyly. “I’m not a man of the world, Dean. I’m a homebody.”

“Dude, you can still listen to real music. Okay, here’s the deal. Whenever we get off this pile of rocks, I’m going to send you a list of music you’ve got to download and listen to…or the friendship is off.”

“I will look forward to it, Dean.”

They lay down some time later and Dean found himself looking at Cas’ profile in the soft glow of the fire. Even dirty, the man was beautiful. He remembered him from the first day, dark hair a sexy mop sticking up in every direction. Smooth tan skin, a runner’s build. Now, the hair was plastered to his head and his clothes were filthy. Dean ran his tongue over his teeth. Without a toothbrush, he knew his breath would knock a buzzard off a shit-wagon. Even still, he fell asleep thinking about kissing Cas.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short chapter. Wanted to have you something before the weekend. I usually can't write on weekends because of "real life". Don't worry, more will be happening Monday.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay. Sometimes life throws a curve ball. But I'm back to writing now and hope to have another update tomorrow evening.

When Dean awoke to the sounds of the camp coming to life, he felt disoriented. He blinked, even shaded by the lean-to, the morning sun was bright. He rolled away from Cas…wait…was he just spooning Cas? Oh, fuck, one of his thighs was held between Cas’ legs. Now was no time to panic. But panic he did. His mind raced. Has the cameras picked up on him wrapped around Cas…another man? He pulled away, his sudden movement rousing the other man. Cas muttered something unintelligible.  
Dean jumped to his feet and tried to calm his heart rate. The camera crews were now shadowing the rest of his tribe. Cas and Anna were the only two left sleeping. Charlie looked up from where she was cooking rice and gave him a grin. “Morning, Sleeping Beauty.”

  
“Morning,” Dean mumbled. He wanted to ask her if anyone noticed his sleeping arrangements, but that would be calling attention to an image he’d just as soon forget happened. No, that wasn’t true. If it was in the privacy of his home, he’d love to wake with Cas in his arms, but not now…not on national television.

  
Dean tried for nonchalance. “Where’s Garth and Benny?”

  
“They just left to go get the tree mail,” she said, nodding towards the path. Jo was cutting up fruit and he almost asked where Lisa was, but then he remembered.

  
“That’s good.” The next challenge was today. “Do you think we should wake Anna and Cas?”

  
“Probably. They should be back soon.”

  
Dean called out softly to Anna and then touched her foot with his. She startled awake. He watched the confusion turn to comprehension. “Benny and Garth should be back with the tree mail soon. You should probably eat something.”

  
“Yeah, thanks.” She sat up and yawned before crawling off the bamboo flooring. It was only after she made it to Charlie’s side that Dean tried to wake Cas.

  
“Cas…Cas…wake up.”

  
Cas groaned and rolled onto his stomach. Dean reached out and shook the man and Cas raised his head to look around. When his eyes lit on Dean, he gave him a soft smile. It sent warmth spiraling through Dean’s chest. “Good morning, Dean.”

  
“You need to get up. Benny and…”

  
“Tree mail,” Benny called out. Dean held out a hand to pull Cas to his feet and soon, the tribe was gathered around to see what the producers of the show were going to throw at them this time.

  
**_“More ropes mean war,_**  
 ** _Your prize creates a chore.”_**

“Okay, this time it’s got to be a tug of war,” Jo said. The rest of the tribe agreed.

“But what could the prize be?” Charlie wondered aloud. Dean shrugged, but before anyone could comment, the handler walked into camp.

“Morning everyone. The truck is waiting to take you to your next challenge.”

Once they were on the path, Dean heard thunder and looked up. Dark clouds were rolling in. “Great. More rain.”

“Such is life in the tropics,” Cas commented. He was sitting next to Dean and Dean was very aware of the heat from Cas’ thigh against his skin. Dean looked down at their legs, side by side. Both men had given up their shirts a few days back and being in such close proximity to a nearly naked man like Cas was sending Dean’s libido into overdrive.

The truck took them back to the beach and sure enough, the area was set up for a tug of war. There was a five foot wide trench dug in the sand and it was full of water. A thick rope was laid out with the center resting on top of the water. Savaii was getting out of their truck as the Upolu tribe pulled up.

“Savaii, this is your first look at the new Upolu tribe. Lisa was voted out at last night’s tribal council. Upolu, you will have to set one tribe member out for this challenge. This is a simple game of tug of war,” Jeff informed them.

Savaii took their place on one side of the trench, while Upolu took the other side.

“You have thirty seconds to plan your strategy starting…now.”  
“Charlie, sit this one out,” Dean suggested. “Anna says she works out regularly, so we can use her.”

Charlie nodded and stepped back. “I’ll take the anchor position,” Benny said and all agreed. They quickly took their places. Dean was on point, with Garth behind him. The two girls came next and Cas was in front of Benny. Dean looked across the trench and faced Kevin, the college student.

“Want to know what you’re playing for?”

Both tribes called out their affirmatives. Jeff lifted the tarp and there were three crates of chickens and a large bag of feed. “You’ve got nine laying hens. If you feed them regular, they’ll stay around your camp and give you fresh eggs…or you can choose to eat them. It’s up to you.”

“Get ready.” Everyone grabbed onto the rope. “Go.”

Dean dug his heels in deep and leaned back. The battle began and Dean knew they had this one won. The small flag tied to the center of the rope moved a few inches towards the Upolu tribe. The teams called out to each other. Charlie was next to Jeff cheering for them. The sand was loose and Dean found that getting traction wasn’t as easy as he thought. He felt himself slipping and the flag moved in the opposite direction. It seemed to last forever. Dean’s hands felt like they were on fire. Beads of perspiration ran down his back and chest. The sweat on his hands stung the forming blisters. He felt the rope give and he pitched forward onto his knees. Momentum gone, Savaii gave it their all and Dean and Garth tumbled into the trench. There was chaos as the red tribe dropped the rope and began hugging each other. Cas reached down a hand to help haul him up.

Once Dean was standing on solid ground again, he put two and two together. Jo had apparently lost her footing and Garth was looking at her ankle. The medics were coming forward. Dean was trying desperately not to be angry. They had this one. With Benny, Cas and Dean, they had the manpower to take the other tribe down. “This sucks,” he mumbled under his breath.

“Savaii wins it. Two challenges each, the tribes are even now. Savaii, take your reward and head back to camp. Upolu, I will see you at tribal council.”

To say the tribe was tense was an understatement. Dean saw Jo sitting in the lean-to, ankle wrapped in an ace bandage, crying. He went and sat down beside her. “Don’t blame yourself, Jo. It could have happened to any of us.”

“Yeah, well, it happened to me, Dean. They said my ankle is just sprained, but I’m supposed to stay off of it. How can I compete? How can I help the tribe win challenges?”

He didn’t know what to say. She was right. Tribal council was in forty-eight hours. “You want to stay here and feel sorry for yourself, or do you want me to carry you over to the fire where you can be part of this tribe?”  
Cas was walking up, but stopped and looked back and forth at the two of them. Dean saw the corner of his mouth lift before he turned around and went back to the fire.

Jo swiped at her eyes and lifted her chin. “I’m part of this tribe.”

“Damn straight.” Dean lifted her with an arm around her back and the other under her knees. He sat her on the log next to Benny. The big Cajun wrapped his arm around her. “You doing okay, Suga’?”

She nodded. Garth brought her dinner to her and Charlie took her to the latrine after she finished eating.

As the sun was going down in the western sky, bathing the sky in a pink and orange glow, Dean nodded his head to Charlie and Cas and they followed him down to the waterfall. “I don’t want Jo to go – not like this.”

“Me neither,” Charlie agreed.

“Jo has heart,” Cas said softly and Dean knew that summed up his feelings as well.

“So – what are we going to do?” Dean asked.

“I’m voting for Anna,” Charlie avowed. “She doesn’t do anything around the camp and to be honest, she talks big about going to the gym and all that, but she was the one who slipped and took down Jo.”

“What?” Dean narrowed his eyes. “I thought she just lost her footing.”

“Nope, I was watching.”

Dean looked at Cas. “You were behind the girls, did you see it?”

“No, Dean. I’m sorry, I was so focused on the rope…” He let his words trail off with a shrug of his shoulders.

Dean put his hand on Cas’ bicep and gave it a squeeze. “It’s okay, don’t sweat it. I believe Charlie saw what really happened. Does this mean we are voting Anna out?”

Both of his friends nodded in agreement. Charlie leaned against Cas and gave Dean a little wink. “I’m going back to camp, you two relax and have some alone time.” She all but skipped down the trail.

Dean was glad for the dwindling light because he knew his face was red. “Dean…”

“Hey, let’s go for a swim,” Dean practically shouted to stop Cas’ question. He pulled off his shorts and dove in. When he came up for air, Cas wasn’t on the bank and he looked around the churning water. Cas’ dark head appeared to his left. He was close to the waterfall. Dean swam up behind him and dunked him. Cas came up sputtering and Dean laughed.

“Revenge is sweet, Dean.” Cas disappeared under the water and with the decreased light, Dean couldn’t see where he went. Suddenly, a hand wrapped around his ankle and pulled him under. When he surfaced, Cas was already there, a grin plastered on his face. Dean was only a foot away, so he could see the droplets on Cas’ skin. His eyes dropped to Cas’ full lips. A taste wouldn’t hurt…

Cas’ eyes widened. “Dean, what…” His words were swallowed up by Dean’s mouth on his. It was just a brush of lips…chaste…affectionate. Dean pulled back. Cas stared at him, his expression unreadable. Dean felt the stirring of panic in his belly.

“I’m sorry, Cas...God…I…”

Cas put a finger across Dean’s lips and it shut him up. “Dean, I won’t be an experiment. I won’t be anyone’s plaything.”

“You’re not…I don’t think…damn it, Cas…I’ve been with men before. Not in a long time, but…”

Cas’ head tilted in that adorable way he had and Dean felt a wave of affection…maybe more, but he wasn’t going to delve into that now. “I still don’t know what you want, Dean.”

Dean’s arms were tiring from treading water and now he felt like he just wanted to sink under the water. What could he say? What did he want to say? “I don’t know what I want, Cas.”

He wasn’t sure what he expected Cas to say, but it wasn’t anywhere close. “Dean, I find myself drawn to you…”

“I sense a but coming,” Dean murmured, eyes still locked on Cas’.

“But…I’m not interested in a televised affair. I want to meet someone who wants to be with me.”

The word televised hit Dean in the chest like a hammer. In his desire to be with Cas, he’d completely forgotten the cameras. His eyes flew over the shoreline, praying to God and all that was holy that they’d followed Charlie back to camp. He saw the telltale red light and the hulking shape of the cameraman on the shore. “Fuck,” he whispered.

Cas followed his gaze and understanding dawned on his face. “You forgot the cameras.”

“Yeah.” Dean struck out for shore. He had to think.  
“Dean,” Cas called out, but Dean was past the point of hearing. What were the guys at the station going to say? Better question, how were they going to treat him now? Maybe it wouldn’t make it on the air. God, who was he trying to kid. Anytime there was sexual tension on the show, it got a lot of air time.

He grabbed his shorts and pulled them over his wet boxers, which defeated the whole purpose of taking them off to begin with. He crashed through the vegetation towards the latrine. It was the one place he could be alone. He leaned against a palm tree and gulped down air. Was this what a panic attack felt like? He went in burning buildings for a living, yet he’d never been this scared. He wanted Sam. Sam always knew the right things to say.

  
Once filming was over, he’d have six months before the winner was announced, so no one would see the show until December. December would be the execution of his career. “Dean?”

  
Dean looked up at Cas. He looked behind him and didn’t see any cameras. Why didn’t they stop Cas? Only one person could be at the latrine at a time.

  
“Jo, Charlie and Benny created some diversionary tactics for the cameramen.”

  
“What did you fuckin’ tell them?” Anger pooled in his stomach. It was bad enough the cameraman got an eyeful, now the rest of the tribe would know.

  
“Nothing. I told them you needed some time alone. You are well liked here, Dean. They didn’t ask questions.”

  
Dean bent and braced his hands on his knees, head down.

  
“You aren’t out.” It wasn’t a question, so Dean didn’t bother answering. He just wanted it all to go away. “I understand your fear, Dean, but…”

  
“No you don’t, Cas. You can’t understand. I live for my fuckin’ career. Firefighting is all I know. What do you think my crew is going to do when they find out they share a shower…a bunkroom…with a faggot.”

  
“Did they trust their lives to you?”

  
“Yeah, of course. We’re a family. You can’t be on a crew without trusting everyone to have your back.”

  
“Perhaps your family – your crew – will surprise you.”

  
“Fat chance.” Dean straightened and rubbed his face. When he removed his hands, Cas was gone. “Damn it.” Cas wasn’t to blame. Hell, he’d made the first move. He slowly walked back to camp. The three cameramen were standing in a cluster giving Jo, Charlie and Benny irritated looks. He’d have to remember to thank them later.

  
Cas was already laying down in the lean-to with his back to the fire. Dean stayed by the fire until everyone was in bed, but Charlie. She looked at him questioningly. “Are you okay?”

  
“Just peachy,” Dean said with a touch of bitterness in his voice.

  
“Cas was worried about you.”

  
“Not his problem,” Dean muttered.

  
“I’m not sure what happened, but if you need someone to talk to, I’m here.” Charlie stood up and touched his shoulder softly before crawling into her spot to sleep. Dean stared at the fire for a long time and then he carefully positioned himself by Cas.

  
In the wee hours of the morning, the dark clouds from the previous day opened up. The tarps kept the tribe dry, but the huge drops were loud enough to wake them all. Dean knew Cas was awake, but he wouldn’t turn around. All the others sat up and talked softly as the rain fell in torrents. Dean saw the cameraman huddled under a makeshift tent. Spitefully, Dean hoped the camera got ruined.

  
He was still awake when the sky lightened. He had no idea what time it was. “I’m going to get some fruit,” he said to Benny and the larger man nodded. There would be no rice or cooked fish today.

  
The earthy scent of the jungle was more intense with the rainfall. Undergrowth brushed at his legs as he made his way to the small stand of breadfruit trees. He picked four and returned to camp. The first thing he noticed was that Cas was gone. “Where’s Cas?” Dean asked Jo.

  
“They’re here early for the confessionals,” she answered as she took the fruit from him. He watched her take up the machete and cut it into large chunks. She laid the pieces out on a large tropic leaf. Dean picked up a couple and sat down next to her to eat.  
“Dean, if you want to vote me out tomorrow, I won’t hold it against you. You know that, right?”

  
“No one wants you to go, Jo.”

  
She was about to reply when Cas stepped back into camp. His shorts were hanging low on his hips and his hair was plastered to his head. The rain sent rivers of water over his chest and down his stomach. He didn’t look at Dean, but managed a smile for Jo.

  
When it was Dean’s turn, he was led to a sheltered outcropping of rocks. The cameraman was under another tent, as was the handler.

  
“Two losses in a row must be hard to take. How is the morale of the Upolu tribe?”

  
“You know, it’s not bad. So what if we lost. We are a strong tribe and we like each other. Tomorrow’s tribal council is going to be tough.” Dean crossed his arms over his chest.

  
“Jo hurt her ankle at the challenge. Is she on the chopping block?”

  
“I can’t speak for everyone else, but Jo doesn’t deserve to leave because she got hurt,” Dean looked right at the camera when he spoke.

  
“Rumor has it that you and Castiel have developed a personal relationship. Care to elaborate?”

  
“No. Cas is a friend, that’s all.”

  
“You can go back to camp now, Dean.” The handler was wearing a slight smirk that Dean really wanted to slap off his face.

  
Dean walked down to the beach by himself and stretched out on the cool sand. The rain had stopped, but everything was still wet. Hands clasped behind his head, he stared up at the sky. Blue was trying to break through the gray clouds and Dean hoped tomorrow would be clear.

  
When he got back, the camp was more subdued. Anna was the only one who seemed to be in a good mood. She smiled up at him. The fire was going and she was tending the pot of rice. Benny’s idea of keeping stacks of firewood under their sleep platform had been perfect. He wondered if the Savaii tribe had enough dry wood to light a fire. Probably not.

  
Cas was in the lean-to, his position was just like Dean’s was on the beach. He was just staring at the tarp above him instead of sky. “Castiel volunteered to be voted off,” Benny told him, after motioning for him to walk away from Anna.

  
“What?” Dean’s voice cracked with shock.

  
“Not sure why. He wouldn’t give a reason. Just said he thought it would be best for everyone.”

  
Dean ran his fingers through his hair in frustration. “Did he talk to anyone else?”

  
“He talked to everyone, Dean.”

  
“Fuck.” Dean blew out his breath angrily.

  
“Dean?” Benny’s voice pulled Dean’s gaze away from Cas’ supine form. “Don’t yank his chain. He’s a nice guy.”

  
“I’m not…” Dean stopped. “I’ll take care of it. You tell the others to forget voting for Cas.”

  
“I’m on it, Brother.” Benny headed towards Charlie and Jo purposefully. Dean counted to ten and strode over to Cas.

  
“What the fuck do you think you’re doing, Cas?”

  
“Resting,” Cas said dryly. His eyes flicked over to Dean and then went back to the tarp.

  
“Don’t be a smartass. You aren’t going home.”

  
Now, the blue eyes did meet Dean’s. “My staying will make things more difficult for you, Dean. The editors will cut any footage of…of our kiss because without me here, they can’t make it into something it’s not.”

  
“It was something, damn it. It was something…to me.”

  
Cas’ smile was soft. “I’m not worth ruining your career for, Dean.”

  
“Cas…” Dean was at a loss for words. Cas was right, wasn’t he? The fact that he was throwing himself on the chopping block for Dean spoke wonders for the man’s character.

  
“Dean, I will count the days here…meeting you… becoming friends with you…as some of the best times of my life. You deserve to win. You keep playing the way you are and you’ll make it all the way. I have faith in you.”

  
“Damn you, Cas. I can’t let you go.” He sat next to Cas. “I won’t let you go.”

  
“How do you want this to play out then, Dean? Shall we stay at arm’s length to avoid speculation?”

  
“Let them fuckin’ speculate.” Dean closed his eyes and let his mouth slide over Cas’. When he pulled back, Cas’ eyes were wide. “I can’t make promises, but I want to see what we have here, Cas.”

  
Cas reached his fingertip to Dean’s face and ran it over his cheekbone. “Okay.”

  
Dean didn’t have to turn around to know the cameras were on them. He could feel them.


	6. Chapter 6

Acceptance wasn’t something Dean expected from the tribe. While homophobia wasn’t rampant in the fire service, it wasn’t talked about either unless it was in the form of a crude joke. That’s why he hid his bisexuality from almost everyone. Of course, Sammy knew. His Uncle Bobby knew. Now, here he was with six people he didn’t know until thirteen days ago, and they just accepted him for who he was…who he really was.

  
Benny even gave Dean and Cas some good natured ribbing about it taking long enough. Charlie kept hugging him and Jo just smiled at him indulgently. Even Anna seemed okay with them. They were still on camera, so it wasn’t like Dean and Cas were groping or kissing each other. They affection was more subtle. A touch, a smile, a whispered comment.

  
The sounds of the night settled around them as they lay on the platform. The electric sound of insects was oppressive the first few nights, now Dean could make out the different types of sounds and they lulled him into a relaxed state. His body was close enough to Cas’ to feel his body heat, but they didn’t touch. They didn’t touch except for the smallest fingers of their hands. Dean’s was curled around Cas. In the dark, not even the cameras could pick up on it unless the guy crawled into the lean-to with them.

  
Dean was awake. The deep, even breathing of his tribe was barely audible over the hums, the flutters or the chirps from the jungle. The night was still and dense and he felt beads of sweat running down his sides to pool on the bamboo below him. He wondered how anyone could sleep in the hot, humid air that settled over them like a blanket. The cool water of the lagoon seemed to call to him and he carefully slipped away from camp. He heard the cameraman following him, but didn’t acknowledge his presence. As provocative as American television was, Dean knew they wouldn’t show nudity on prime time, so he shucked off his shorts and boxers. He climbed up on the rock outcropping over the deepest part of the inlet and plunged head first into the water. He surfaced and then struck out for the opposite shore. He cut through the water quickly and cleanly. As he neared the rocky edge on the other side of the waterfall, he turned and headed back. Halfway, he stopped to breath, treading water.

  
Around him the water was inky black, rippling from the crashing water tumbling down from above. He took a deep breath and struck out for shore. Movement ahead threw off his stroke and he looked up. Cas stood on the rock looking down at him. “Hi, Handsome,” Dean said. “Come on in, the water’s nice and cool.”

  
He saw the flash of white teeth and Cas unbuttoned his shorts. Dean watched them slide down his legs and held back a moan. Cas stepped to the edge of the rock and set himself up to dive, but Dean stopped him. “Lose the underwear.”

  
Cas looked over his shoulder in the direction of the cameraman and then back at Dean. “Don’t worry, they can’t show your naked ass on television. Your virtue is safe.”

  
Dean heard the soft chuckle and suddenly, Cas was naked. Why couldn’t it be a full moon? Dean could only see shadows over Cas’ body. He didn’t have time to lament too much because Cas executed a beautiful swan dive into the water. Dean waited, his eyes scanning the water. Cas broke the surface and used both hands to push his hair out of his face. “The water does feel amazing.”

  
“Uh.” Knowing Cas was naked and less than two feet away from him scrambled Dean’s ability to think or speak.

  
“Are you okay?” Cas moved a few inches closer, concern on his face. Dean opened his mouth, but closed it again and just nodded stupidly. “Dean?”

  
“I’m…uh…you’re naked…” And damn each and every brain cell he had was now in his dick. Cas’ soft huff of laughter only added to Dean’s humiliation.

  
“So are you,” he said softly and there wasn’t a built in microphone on any camera that could have picked up his words.

  
“Yeah.” Dean grinned. “Let’s go.” With a quick glance around the lagoon, Dean found the darkest place. Just to the right of the waterfall, there was another ledge of rocks. Dean kicked out and started swimming. He heard Cas slightly behind him. Under the ledge, Dean’s feet found purchase on the rocky bottom. It was only about five feet deep. Cas brushed against him and the skin to skin contact sent shivers up and down Dean’s spine. “Cas…”

  
Dean could not have told you who moved first, but there they were arms and legs tangled together, mouths seeking – and finding. Dean’s fingers combed through dark hair. His hard cock brushed against Cas’ and he felt a physical ache. Cas wasn’t unaffected if the noises he was making were anything to go by. A litany of words strung together by soft gasps barely heard over the crash of the falls, “Wanted this…beautiful…so beautiful…just to touch…please…Dean…”

  
Dean reached out and took the cheeks of Cas’ ass in his hands and brought their erections together. Fuck…Cas… Seconds later they were both rutting and thrusting against each other like animals. Dean wrapped his hand around their shafts, but water was not conducive to good sex. He couldn’t get the slick, smooth slide he wanted. Cas didn’t seem to mind, if the sharp nips to his neck were any indication. “Want you, Cas,” Dean grunted. His throat was bared to Cas’ mouth and the other man was taking full advantage of it.

  
“Dean…” His name was whispered against the heated flesh below his jaw. A mewling sound came from Dean’s mouth…he was close…his orgasm hung balanced on the abyss…heat pooling in his belly…

  
“Gonna…fuck…” Dean’s muscles locked up as he tipped over the edge. He couldn’t catch his breath…spots formed in front of his eyes. He was vaguely aware of Cas’ hand closing over his. His only coherent thought – get Cas off. With his other hand, he cupped Cas’ balls and rolled them in his palm. “Come for me, Cas.”

  
Cas’ body jerked against him, a long, low moan of pleasure escaped Cas’ mouth and finally, he slumped against Dean. “We should get back to camp and try to sleep,” Dean murmured after a few moments.

  
He felt Cas’ soft exhale against his neck and then the man pulled away. “Yes, we probably should.”

  
They pulled themselves out of the water and fumbled around for their clothes. The cameraman was a harsh reminder to Dean what he’d just done. He stumbled on the path as nausea hit him. “Dean, are you okay?” He was bent at the waist now, trying not to heave out his guts.

  
“Yeah, I’m good.” He wasn’t, but he sure as hell wouldn’t make Cas feel ashamed of what they’d done. He wouldn’t let the man have any regrets. But what about his regrets? He breathed in – out – in again. No, he didn’t regret being with Cas. He straightened and nodded. “I’m good.”

  
If Cas doubted him, he didn’t say so.

  
The next morning, the morning of their second tribal council, the camp was not tense like the first time. There were smiles of encouragement. Laughter.

  
Benny found two long branches and with the help of Dean’s old t-shirt, he fashioned a set of crutches for Jo. Once she was more mobile, she helped where she could. Dean admired her spirit. No, Jo wouldn’t be getting his vote tonight. He wasn’t sure about everyone else, but his vote would go to Anna.

  
The afternoon sun was sinking fast when the handler appeared. “Everyone ready? Gather your torches.”

  
Reality sank in once everyone was in the truck. Gone was the laughter and easy conversation.

  
“Upolu, two tribal councils in a row. That’s got to be a blow to the tribe that came out the gate fighting,” observed Jeff. “Jo, how’s the ankle?”

  
“Hurts like a bitch, but I’m good,” she said, tossing her lanky blonde hair back.

  
‘How afraid of leaving are you tonight?”

  
“Very. My tribe knows I won’t hold any vote against them, but I’m not ready to give up.” Charlie reached over and took one of her hands. Benny, on her other side, did the same.

  
“Tonight’s vote will bring the tribes to an even number again. You have four more challenges before the merge. I’ve got to say that it’s been a long time since I’ve seen a tribe pull together this closely.” Jeff looked right at Dean. “Dean, you’ve taken the leadership role to a certain extent. How do you feel about tonight’s vote?”

  
“Nervous. Upolu is close, but in the end, it’s a game. A million dollar prize doesn’t make anyone safe.”

  
“Does your relationship with Castiel make your position stronger or weaker?” Jeff asked, a hint of a smile on his lips. Dean narrowed his eyes at the likeable host.

  
He felt a hand on his shoulder and was surprised to find it was Garth. It was also Garth that spoke up. “Dean is a strong player, but more than that, he’s become a friend to all of us. We support whatever he does in his private life.”

  
The emphasis on the word ‘private’ didn’t escape Jeff’s attention and his eyebrows rose comically. “Dean, you’re up first.”

  
Dean rose and strode to the private area to vote. He wrote down Anna’s name and then looked into the camera. “Anna, you’re a nice girl, but I’ve got to go by what my gut tells me.”

  
One by one, the tribe voted and came back to take their places. Jeff collected the lidded tiki pot and sat it up on the wooden podium. He reached in and unfolded the first sheet of paper.

  
“Anna.” Dean stared straight ahead.

  
“Jo.”

  
“Anna.” It wasn’t Dean’s writing, but it didn’t mean he or Jo were safe. His palms began to sweat.

  
“Anna. Three votes, Anna.”

  
“Anna. Four votes, Anna.”

  
“The fourth person voted off Survivor Upolu, Anna. Anna, bring me your torch.” Anna stood up and took her torch to Jeff. She held it out in front of her and he doused it. “Anna, the tribe has spoken.”

  
After Anna walked down the path, Jeff addressed them. “Upolu, you have a challenge tomorrow. I suggest you get some sleep. Head on back to camp.”

  
They were halfway back to camp before anyone spoke. “I was the weakest link. I have a fucked up ankle, but y’all keep me anyway. I won’t forget that.” Jo brushed a tear away, but she held her head high.

  
When the truck stopped to let them out, the handler reminded them to check the tree mail because the challenge tomorrow would begin early. Dean and Cas volunteered to go. Once on the path, Cas said, “If Garth hadn’t spoke up, what would you have said?”

  
Dean shrugged. “I’d like to think it would make me stronger, but once the merge happens – if we are still in the running – it might make me weaker. I just don’t know enough about Savaii to answer.”

  
Cas didn’t respond. Dean saw the bamboo tube hanging from the tree and untied it quickly. He turned. “Cas, whatever happens…”

  
“Dean, no promises. We can’t know what the future holds. I’d like to think that once this is all over, you and I could explore a…relationship.”

  
“Right. No promises.” That was good, right? So, why did he feel like shit?

  
Back in camp, the remaining tribe members gathered around and Dean unrolled the scroll. He read it aloud.

  
**_“Race to find and take,_**  
 ** _Be careful not to break.”_**

  
“It’s a fucking race,” Jo moaned.

  
After everyone was on the sleep platform, they talked about tribal council. Dean surprised himself by thanking Garth. “What you said…Man, that was stand up…thanks.”

  
“It was nothing,” Garth protested.

  
“Don’t sell yourself short, Garth. What you said about Dean was pretty cool,” Charlie said with conviction.

  
The handler said early, but Dean didn’t expect him to come into the camp right as the sun was coming up. “Rise and shine, everyone. The truck is waiting.”

  
“Rise and shine, my ass,” Dean muttered.

  
“I’d sell my soul for coffee. Seriously.” Benny said.

  
Savaii didn’t look much better than Upolu. Blank eyes stared at the small platform where Jeff stood next to a stack of baskets. He looked freshly showered and Dean would bet money that the host probably had both coffee and breakfast before showing up for this challenge.

  
“Good morning,” he called out and there were a few answers, but mostly the tribes remained mute. “Today’s challenge is pretty easy. Each tribe member will get a basket. The surrounding hundred square yards has been roped off. Inside the area, we have hidden fifty fresh eggs. You have ten minutes to find as many as you can, collect them and bring them back to me. Whichever tribe has the most unbroken eggs wins the challenge.” He picked up the baskets and began passing them out. Once he was finished, he got back up on the platform. “Want to know what you’re playing for?”

  
Everyone nodded. He picked up the edge of a tarp and unveiled two burlap bags. “Five more pounds of rice and five pounds of dried beans.”

  
Dean knew the beans would give them a lot of protein. “We’ve got this, guys.”

  
“You have one minute to strategize. Time starts now.”

  
The Upolu and Savaii tribes huddled around each other. Dean looked at Jo. “Jo, you go over by those rocks. Just stay and search that area. The rest of us will spread out in all directions.”

  
“You think we should go out to the boundary rope and work our way inwards?” Benny asked.

  
“Good idea.”

  
“That’s time.” Jeff called out. “Tribes ready…go.”

  
Dean raced away. He ran until he came to a rope tied with white flags. Turning around, he began to look at the ground, around rocks and trees. He walked a grid, like he did in burned out houses looking for clues to the source of a fire. He found two.

  
Jeff must have got a megaphone. “Two minutes,” boomed out from the clearing. Dean sped up. He found another one in a rotted log. He could see the clearing. Cameramen and handlers were everywhere, all trying to stay out of the other camera’s viewfinders.

  
“One minute.”

  
“Fuck,” Dean muttered. Three fucking eggs. He hoped his tribe had better luck than he did. Eyes to the ground, he continued to search until a whistle blew.

  
“Stop and bring your baskets in.” Dean looked down at his measly offering and wished he’d participated in more Easter Egg Hunts as a child.

  
Jeff called the tribe members up one at a time. Savaii was first. “Savaii, thirteen eggs.”

  
Dean’s tribe stepped up. Jo proudly pulled out three eggs, all unbroken. Cas was next with four. “Way to go, Cas,” Dean said, grinning. Dean put his three on the platform. Charlie laid out two. She had three, but one was broken. Garth had two and Benny had one.

  
“Upolu, fifteen. Upolu wins.” Dean grabbed Cas and hugged him tight. At Jeff’s appraising look, he stepped away and picked up Jo, swinging her around.

  
“Upolu, grab your reward and head back to camp. Savaii, I will see you at tribal council.”

  
Back at camp, Charlie and Benny cooked a pot of rice and after they ate, they put on some beans to soak. Garth and Charlie wandered off to gather more firewood, while Benny and Dean went fishing. Cas, as usual, took the mask and snorkel and headed to the beach.

  
They each were pulled away for the confessional that afternoon. The handler took Dean to a small glade and had him sit on a log.

  
“Jeff mentioned at the last tribal council that Upolu is a very close knit tribe, why do you think that is?”

  
Dean leaned forward, his elbows on his knees, hands clasped between them. “I don’t really know. It’s like we just bonded. Jo and Charlie remind me of little sisters I’ve never wanted.” He laughed softly at his own joke. “Benny, Garth and Cas…well, they’re good men. I’d like to think we’d be friends in the real world.”

  
“It’s no secret that you and Castiel have formed a stronger bond. How would you describe your relationship?” Dean knew it was coming, but he still felt like the bottom dropped out from under him.

  
“We’re…we’re close.” He clammed up, refusing to say more. It was no one’s business, especially not millions of viewers.

  
Walking back to camp, Dean reflected. His whole life he hadn’t cared what anyone thought of him. Why did he care so much now? He made it through the fire academy with honors. He was respected by his crew…his captain…his chief. Was he afraid of losing that respect? Sammy would have wise words to preach, but Sammy wasn’t here.

  
That night, they celebrated. The beans tasted like manna from heaven after two weeks of rice, fruit and seafood. Of course, they had the fish Dean and Benny caught and a couple of crabs that Cas had found. Bellies full, everyone turned in except Dean and Cas.

  
“They asked me about our…thing,” Dean whispered.

  
“What did you say?” Cas asked, poking a stick into the fire, causing sparks to fly up into the night sky.

  
“I said we were close.” Dean glanced over at Cas. “Did they ask you about it?”

  
“Yes.” Cas looked up at the camera pointedly. Dean winced. When was he going to learn to keep his mouth shut? Not that it mattered. The fucking cat was just out of the bag, the damn thing was doing a line dance while tipping his hat to the ladies.

  
“Let’s go to bed.” And didn’t that sound suggestive? Dean ran his fingers through his dirty hair. He couldn’t win.

  
Both men were on their backs. Dean was hyper-aware of the camera now. It was just to his left, the red light glowed in the darkness. “Fuck it,” he mumbled and rolled to his side, back to it. He brought his face to Cas’ ear and whispered, “I’m not going to lie and say I’m comfortable with…whatever we have…being flaunted on television, but I’m not going to slink around with my tail between my legs either. My brother, Sammy, would probably be cussing me a blue streak.”

  
Cas turned to face him. “Dean, I’m not ashamed of my sexuality. But…your life is different from mine. I don’t expect you to…to be comfortable with all this.”

  
“That’s just it, Cas. I’m comfortable with you. I shouldn’t let what other people think control my actions. I mean…hell, I’d much rather we met under different circumstances. National television isn’t how I’d choose to come out…but I just don’t want you to think I’m ashamed of how I feel.” Dean groaned. “What is it about you that make me want to share my feelings like a chick? Next, I’ll be waving a rainbow flag and marching around in gold lame’ shorts.”

  
Cas chuckled. “Please don’t. Gold lame’ is so last year.”

  
“Asshole.”

  
Dean fell asleep with his arm still around Cas and the video continued to roll.

  
***

  
**Meanwhile, in a small hotel five miles away…**

  
“Ratings are going to skyrocket,” Crowley, the Survivor franchise’s co-producer exclaimed. “This is a first. Not only is it a gay relationship, but Winchester was listed as straight in his bio.”

  
“You’re right, it will be good for ratings, but I don’t feel comfortable exploiting them just because they’re gay,” Jeff said, tapping the table with his fingertips. He loved to say and do things to get a rise out of the contestants, but having a guy come out unintentionally wasn’t something he wanted to cash in on. From the daily footage he’d seen, Dean was a really nice guy. Unlike some of the past game players, Dean was a saint. And Castiel Novak was almost unbelievably good hearted. Offering himself up to protect Dean…when had that ever happened on an episode of Survivor? Never.

  
“Hey, nobody twists their arms to come on the show. They know from the start, they’re lives will be splashed across televisions everywhere.”

  
“For once, I’m pulling rank here, Crowley. We aren’t focusing on them. Whatever happens, happens, but I draw the line at exploiting them because they’re gay.”

  
“You’re the executive producer,” Crowley said with a shrug. “I just think it could give us a boost in the Neilsen ratings.”

  
“We’re holding our own and have been picked up for another season. I’m cool with that.”

  
The talk turned to the next challenge. Once Jeff returned to his hotel, he thought of the two men. Crowley was right, ratings would go up if they focused on their budding relationship. There was a fine line between exploitation and getting good footage. Jeff would have to ride that line carefully.


	7. Chapter 7

For Dean, the next two days flew by. He spent all his time with Cas or trying to devise a plan to get Cas alone without cameramen getting too close. The tribe was running like a well oiled machine, each member sharing in the day to day needs of the camp.

The morning of the next challenge, Benny and Charlie came back into camp with the tree mail. Charlie read it out loud.

**_“Build it up, form a tower,_ **

**_The winning tribe will hold the power.”_ **

“Sounds like we’ll have to build something,” Garth stated the obvious. Dean looked at him and grinned. He really was a quirky little guy, but Dean couldn’t help but like him.

“Well, we should probably cook a quick meal. Who knows when they’re going to come get us,” Charlie said, already pouring water into the pot for rice. Dean and Cas took the fishing gear and took off for their favorite spot. They found it the previous morning. It was on the far side of the lagoon and they had to climb over lots of rocks and tree roots to get to it. The cameraman couldn’t get the large video camera through the undergrowth and while he could see them, he couldn’t record them, even with the extended boom.

They leaned against each other and talked. Dean wasn’t much of a talker when it came to the people he slept with…or dated for that matter. Cas was different. Dean would ask him about his books or hobbies, and suddenly, Cas had it turned around and he was telling the man all about his car…or his love of cooking…or the time he almost bought an engagement ring for Cassie…

“She was your first love?” Cas asked quietly, neither taking chances with their conversation being picked up by the microphone.

“Yeah. But hey, at least I got the money back from the jewelry store.” Dean shrugged away the feeling of failure.

“If she couldn’t handle your career – your very noble career – then she wasn’t enough woman for you, Dean. Spouses of the military, the police or the fire service must be strong and loyal. You deserve someone like that. Someone who you know will be there when you come home. I’m not saying they should never get scared that their loved one won’t come home that day, but they can’t live in fear. Loving someone should be treating every minute with them like it’s your last.”

Dean inhaled and then blew out the breath through softly parted lips. “Have you ever loved someone like that?” Had Dean loved Cassie like that? Looking back, he didn’t think so.

“I thought I was in love once, but in answer to your question, no – not like that.” The fishing line snapped tight and Dean hauled back on it. Something big was on the line. With Cas’ help, Dean landed a huge grouper. It took both of them and a lot of cursing from Dean to get it through the underbrush and across the rocks to camp. The cameraman was not happy he’d been foiled, but Dean didn’t really care.

The tribe was excited about the large fish and they ate until their stomachs were uncomfortably full. Dean looked down at his belly and patted it. While he had probably dropped a good seven or eight pounds since Survivor began, he had a nice little Buddha belly going on. He caught Cas trying to hide a smile and he blushed. “You two are adorably sickening,” Charlie said with a giggle.

“Shut up,” Dean responded, but there was no heat behind his words. 

The handler came into the clearing and got their attention. They all stood up and ambled over.

“It’s time for the next challenge, you’ll need to follow me. The truck is waiting.”

If Dean didn’t know any better, he’d swear the logs were the size of railroad ties. He hoped they didn’t weigh as much. There were six piles of logs arranged in a huge circle. In the middle were two wooden platforms, approximately thirty yards apart. Jeff stood in the center.

“Upolu, take a look at the new Savaii tribe, Kevin Tran was voted off at tribal counsel.” Dean remembered the kid as being a tough player. He wondered what happened to cause his tribe to send him packing.

“Today’s challenge is to create a tower using these logs. You get as high as you can. Whichever team’s tower collapses first loses. Want to know what you’re playing for?”

The two tribes clapped and called out. Jeff whipped the tarp off and revealed a large cooler. “Inside this cooler is enough beer and wine for the winning tribe to have a little party on the beach tonight.” Dean whooped. He’d almost forgotten what beer tasted like.

He bumped fists with Benny. “If that ain’t enough to light a fire under our asses, nothing will,” the Cajun said. His grin was infectious.

“Upolu, you’re sitting someone out. Thirty seconds to strategize. Time starts now.” Upolu huddled together and the obvious choice was Jo. She wasn’t happy about it, but she knew her limits. Their strategy was for Dean and Benny to haul the logs close enough to stack while Cas and Garth would put them where Charlie told them.

“Times up,” Jeff called out. Both tribes took their positions. “Go,” Jeff shouted.

The logs weighed about a hundred pounds which wasn’t nearly as bad as Dean suspected. He and Benny moved fast. Charlie was pointing and directing Garth and Cas to stack them like Lincoln Logs – two logs parallel on each layer, crisscrossed on the next tier. It was a good plan. He didn’t bother to look at Savaii’s strategy.

Sweat dripped into his eyes, but he kept moving. Back and forth. The steady sound of logs clunking together urged him on. His back ached. Benny was slowing down, his breath coming in short gasps. “We got this Benny,” Dean called out encouragingly. Benny nodded as they bent to pick up another log.

The sound was horrific. A loud rattling sound and Dean closed his eyes. He could picture logs rolling in all directions. He bit his lower lip and turned. Savaii’s tower had collapsed. Their tribe stood in shock and disappointment.

Dean grinned and with a signal, he and Benny dropped the log they were holding. They ran to their tribe and hugged.

“Upolu wins again. Two in a row for a total of four,” Jeff avowed. “Upolu, you can go back to camp. Tonight, you’ll have your party to celebrate your victory. Savaii, you will be going to tribal council.”

The blue tribe was elated. Dean had his arm around Cas in the truck all the way back. Everyone was laughing and looking forward to their prize.

Just before sundown, the handler came to camp and informed them it was time for the confessional. Dean grumbled. He hated this. He watched his tribe members getting led off into the jungle and he pulled Cas to the lean-to. They lay side by side, fingers intertwined. Dean never felt comfortable asking Cas what he talked about during his camera time, but he was curious. He supposed he’d see it when the episodes aired.

“It sure was nice to win again today.”

“Yes, it was. There will be more Upolu members after the merge. That is a good thing.” Cas rolled to his side, facing Dean. He placed a hand on Dean’s heart. Dean knew the exact moment Cas remembered the cameras. His hand pulled back like he’d been burned. Dean caught it and put it back on his chest. “Dean…”

“Shhh. Yeah, I know. But…I really don’t care.” Cas’ barely there smile was enough to know he’d made the right call.

“Dean.” His name was called out and he muttered, “I hate this bullshit.” He stood and followed the handler into the trees. They’d used this place before. A flat rock with the waterfall in the background.

“Four wins into the game, have you thought about alliances and strategies to get you to the top three?”

Dean rubbed the back of his neck and tried to refrain from rolling his eyes. “We haven’t talked about alliances too much. My only strategy is to do my best and play the game as fairly as I can.”

“As the merge nears, Upolu has the advantage. Will you work to keep Upolu together?”

“Of course. We genuinely like each other. I’ve got nothing against any of the Savaii tribe members, but they’ll go before I vote for anyone in my tribe.”

As the stars came out, the tribe’s excitement grew. They were surprised to see Jeff stroll into the clearing. “Are you ready for your beach party?”

“Fuck, yeah,” Dean shouted and the rest of the tribe laughed. Jeff led them down to the beach where a large bonfire burned. There were six short, fat logs turned on end. One for each of them. The cooler was open and Dean saw it was full of ice and bottles of beer. There were three bottles of wine as well. A combination corkscrew and bottle open hung from a piece of string tied to one of the handles.

“Enjoy yourselves. You deserve it.” Jeff got into a jeep parked just out of the circle of the firelight and it roared away.

For a second, no one moved. “Fuck you all, I’m having a beer,” Jo whooped and hobbled forward on her bamboo crutches. Everyone seemed to move at once. Dean pulled out two and popped off the caps. He handed Cas one of them and they touched the lips of the bottles together.

“Hey, everyone…” Garth’s voice cut through the laughter. Once everyone was silent, he held his bottle aloft. “I just want to propose a toast to Upolu. I feel like y’all are family and I’d just like to say that no matter what happens at the end of this game…you guys are the best.”

“Cheers,” Dean said, clinking his bottle with Garth’s. Once everyone’s bottle had made the rounds for the toast, they drank. The talking was loud and peppered with laughter, but soon the alcohol took its toll. Eighteen days without alcohol for Dean was a lot. He’d only had five and he was buzzed. Garth started getting really tipsy after his second one and he was now leaning heavily on Charlie. Charlie held a half bottle of wine in her fist and her eyes were glassy. Benny and Jo seemed to be holding their own. Dean looked at Cas. Cas was quietly staring into the fire. “You still with me, Cas?”

Cas turned his gaze to Dean and he smiled. “Yes. I have a strong tolerance for alcohol.”

“Me too, usually,” Dean’s eyes dropped to Cas’ lips. God, he had beautiful lips. Just made for kissing. “You have pretty lips.”

Cas raised an eyebrow. “Dean, are you drunk?”

“I might be,” Dean replied. “I ain’t blind though. You do have pretty lips. Made just for kissing…kissing me.” Dean stood up and the alcohol rushed to his head and he staggered. Cas caught him by wrapping his hands around his waist. Dean took that as an invitation to sit down on the other man’s lap.

Charlie giggled and Benny held out his beer. “Don’t mind us,” Benny commented dryly.

“Yeah, pretend we aren’t here,” Jo added. She was leaning on Benny and his large arm was supporting her.

“See Cas, they aren’t here,” Dean’s words slurred, but he knew he wasn’t wasted. He was just feeling good. Yep, just feeling good. He was feeling so good he ground his hips into Cas and chuckled when he heard Cas’ swift intact of air.

“Dean…”

“Shhhh.” Dean put a finger to his lips. “You’ll wake everyone up.” Cas couldn’t reply because Dean’s mouth crashed down on his. In Cas’ defense, he did try to hold Dean at arm’s length, but Dean was quite a bit stronger even in his inebriated state.

When Dean finally had to come up for air, Cas hissed at him. “Dean, the cameras.”

“Fuck the cameras,” Dean barked tauntingly in the direction of the cameramen before turning back to Cas and grabbing his face with both hands. “I want you, Cas.”

Dean woke with a pounding in his head. He blinked and groaned, before covering his eyes with his arm. The pounding was really loud and he surmised it wasn’t in his head. He braced himself for the pain and opened his eyes. The bright sun glared down at him, its reflection on the sand temporarily blinding him. He whimpered, but managed to roll onto his stomach and then rose on all fours. He was on the beach. The noise was the surf just a few yards away. Cas was slumped against one of the logs, arms crossed over his chest, dead ass asleep. Garth was curled up in the sand on the other side of the fire pit. Charlie, Jo and Benny were nowhere to be seen.

He used the log to pull himself to a kneeling position and then with a mighty heave he stood up. He heard a chuckle behind him and turned to face two of the cameramen. He held up his middle finger and then shuffled to the water. Dean kicked off his shorts and waded out. When he was waist deep, he sank down and dipped his head under the water. He felt a little more awake. He’d been drunker than he thought last night. The memories of the previous night came flooding back. “Son of a bitch.” He closed his eyes.

Benny was the one that swam out to him. “You okay out here, Brother?”

“No,” Dean mumbled.

“I know you’re a bit skittish about you and Cas being on camera and all, but if he makes you happy – fuck everyone else.”

“That’s easy for you to say. I like being with him and I told him that I didn’t care about the damn camera…but fuck, Benny, I’m not out to my friends and crew. I sure as fuck don’t want them finding out by watching the fuckin’ television.”

“Brother, think about it, after the final vote from the jury, we all go home. The episodes don’t begin to air for another six months. You have time to tell the people that matter to you.”

Dean knew Benny was right, but it didn’t make it any easier on him. He looked back towards the beach. Cas was up and staring out at them. “I don’t even know if he’s going to want anything to do with me after we leave here.”

“You can’t be that stupid, Dean.”

He met Benny’s eyes. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Have you seen the way the man looks at you?” Benny just shook his head and took off swimming towards shore. Dean waited a full minute before following him in.

Benny had Garth up and stumbling back towards camp by the time Dean got to the fire pit. Cas watched him warily. “I guess I got pretty wasted last night, huh?”

“Are you okay?” How many times had Cas asked that of him? Had he ever asked Cas how he was? How this was affecting him?

“Sure, I’m good.” He knew Cas didn’t believe him by the look on his face, but he didn’t say anything in front of the camera crew. “Let’s go back to camp. I’m starving.” He had a killer headache too, but nothing could be done about that.

They didn’t get another moment truly alone until the next day. Dean waited until one camera crew was filming Jo and Benny talking quietly on the bamboo platform, one crew was out with Garth while he did a confessional and the other was on Charlie, who was bathing topless in the lagoon. Quickly and quietly, he grabbed Cas’ hand and took off for the thickest part of the jungle before anyone saw them.

He kept going until Cas dug in his heels behind him. He almost pulled Dean off balance. “Whoa…warn a guy.”

“Dean, what’s this about?” Dean shrugged and then ran both hands over his face. Cas had been quieter than usual since they’d woke up on the beach.

“Look, I just…I want to…damn it. I’m sorry I got so fuckin’ drunk that I mauled you in front of God and everybody the other night.”

“I wouldn’t have used the word ‘mauled’, but I’m sure the cameraman got some interesting footage.”

Dean’s bark of laughter lacked humor. “Yeah.” He looked around them, taking in the sounds of the jungle. Birds called back and forth, a soft breeze rustled the leaves and distantly, the sound of the surf crashing against rocks. “Cas, I just don’t know what I’m doing. There’s a part of me that wishes I would have never sent that stupid video in for the casting call. My life was pretty fuckin’ normal – I worked, I dated , I hung out with my brother and friends…

“You dated women,” Cas said softly.

“Yes…no…sure…I dated women, but I saw men too. It’s just that they were…” No matter what words he chose, he was going to sound like an asshole.

“Just someone to warm your bed, but you couldn’t be seen in public,” Cas’ face was blank and his words were a monotone.

Dean licked his lips and nodded.

“I wish I never allowed by publicist to send my video in, but for a different reason than yours.” Cas turned sharply and walked away.

Dean watched him go, fists clinched at his sides. “Fuck,” he whispered.

“Cas,” the shout startled birds form the trees and Dean ran.

Cas was still striding purposefully back to camp. Dean caught up with him and grabbed his shoulder to swing him around. “I’m sorry. I’m so fuckin’ sorry. I’m an asshole and a complete idiot. I want…I want you, Cas…I want to be with you.”

“You said that before, Dean. Apparently, you didn’t mean it then…what’s changed? Why should I believe you now?” Dean simply stared. He stared into the most beautiful eyes he’d ever seen and words escaped him. He opened his mouth, only to close it again. Cas shrugged Dean’s hand off his shoulder and turned away once more.

Cas broke through the edge of the jungle and made his way towards the lean-to. He grabbed the snorkel and mask and everyone looked up. All three of the camera pivoted around. Dean’s steps were slower and he saw pity in Charlie’s eyes. Jo looked like she was pissed off at him. Garth made a step to go after Cas, but Dean began to shake his head from side to side.

This time when he caught up with Cas, he swung him around and wrapped his arms around him. “I need you, Cas. Please… give me another chance…please…just forgive me.” He saw the track of the tears on Cas’ grimy face. He’d put those there.

Dean saw the handler out of the corner of his eye. He let go of Cas and turned towards him. “Bring your fucking camera, I have something to say.”

Leaving Cas standing there, Dean followed the two other men into the jungle. The handler motioned for him to sit, but Dean ignored him and leaned against a tree, hands thrust in his pockets. It tugged the loose shorts down past his hipbones and if the camera would have focused on it, the viewers would have gotten a hint of his public hair.

“Okay, so you wanted to talk to the camera,” the handler said.

“Yeah.” He looked into the camera and began. “I’m bisexual. I always have been, I guess. I don’t…look, no one really knows…alright? I came here to win a million bucks and…and I go and meet this amazing…funny…gorgeous man. He thinks I’m ashamed of him and who I am. I’m not…I’m not ashamed of him…never of him…I’m ashamed of hiding who I really am. So…that’s all I’ve got to say.” Dean’s heart was pounding and he thought he was going to throw up. He didn’t remember the trip back to camp. His eyes moved wildly around and didn’t see Cas. Pleadingly, he looked at the rest of his tribe. Benny nodded his head towards the beach.

Cas was standing at the waterline, the tide swirling around his ankles as he looked out to sea. Dean saw the tightening of his back muscles and knew the man sensed his presence. “I just told a few million viewers that I was bi and you were gorgeous.”

Dean saw Cas’ eyes close. “I may have said you were amazing too.” Cas’ lips twitched and Dean’s heart rate slowed.

“And funny…definitely funny…I should have thrown in the word talented…you know because you’re a great writer…”

“Talented would have been nice…highly intelligent too.” Cas said, his eyes now focused on Dean.

Dean grinned. “Well, next time I’m in front of the camera, I’ll mention those.”

Hesitantly, Dean leaned towards Cas and Cas met him halfway. The camera angle was perfect. It showed two men kissing passionately in the late afternoon sun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know...cliffhanger...
> 
> And it's the weekend. I'll be making soap and cleaning my nasty house...I will try to write too.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter includes the most disgusting challenge that Survivor contestants face. Eating disgusting things. If you have a squeamish stomach - I will apologize in advance. Eating bugs and stuff is nasty. I could not do it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the delay. I hate when real life rears its ugly head. I know things are going slow in the romance department, but keep in mind, both men don't want their intimate details spread out for the world to see on the television screen. Once the filming ends, they have six months until the winner is revealed. During those six months, Dean and Cas must see if their romantic feelings can endure the real world.

The Upolu tribe spent the next two days fortifying their shelter. With the help of the tarps they’d won, the lean-to now had sides to keep the rain out. Dean and Benny stepped back and looked at their handiwork. Cas was lashing on the last of the bamboo braces to hold the tarps down in case they get some strong winds.

  
“Not bad at all,” Benny said, clapping Dean on the back.

  
“It looks great, guys,” Jo said, from her stop next to the fire. She was slicing breadfruit for their dinner. Two large fish were already cut up and ready to be cooked. Garth and Charlie had taken the canteens into the jungle to refill them for everyone.

  
Charlie came bursting through the trees. “Tree mail,” she shouted. Garth was behind her, their canteens balance precariously in his arms. The tribe gathered around her. Dean helped Garth to deposit his load onto the bamboo table Dean and Cas made earlier that day.

  
**_“Your tribe must not decline,_**  
 ** _If you want to dine.”_**

  
“Well, the reward is something to eat,” Jo said helpfully.

  
“Yeah, but what do we have to do to get it?” Dean asked.

  
Cas and Dean, as was their evening habit, walked down to the lagoon and took off their shorts. Clad only in their boxers, they’d swim for a little while. Under the cover of darkness, they made out like horny teenagers under the cover of the outcropping near the waterfall. Dean wanted Cas so bad, but it was one thing to be kissing and touching Cas on camera, anything further would cheapen their relationship. Once they were cool and as clean as they could get without basic toiletries like soap, the two men would come back to camp and talk until the wee hours of the morning. They slept side by side, usually waking with legs and arms entwined.

  
The next morning was hot and humid. The tribe ate together and rested for the day’s challenge. It was long into the afternoon before the handler entered camp. “Head down to the beach, please.”

  
As they arrived, Dean took in the setup and groaned. “What?” Cas asked him quietly.

  
“We’ve got to eat something pretty fuckin’ disgusting.” Dean noted the long bamboo table set with wooden plates. Next to Jeff was tall covered thing. Dean had seen enough Survivor episodes to know that what they were about to eat wasn’t pie…more like pig dicks or some shit like that.

  
The red tribe strolled out of the woods and took their place on the red mat to Jeff’s left. Upolu stood on the blue one to his right.

  
“Upolu, take a look at Savaii’s tribe. Gabe was voted out at the last tribal council,” Jeff said. The two teams eyed each other with open hostility. “Upolu, instead of sitting two out for this challenge, Savaii, must pick two tribe members to go twice. You have thirty seconds to pick those two.”

  
Savaii huddled up and with a nod to Jeff, they moved back to their mat.

  
With a flourish, Jeff unveiled a spinning wheel, in each triangle were the items and it made Dean’s stomach roll. “Each tribe member will come forward and spin the wheel, you must eat the item you rolled and keep it down. Refuse or throw it up, your tribe loses a point. Want to know what you’re playing for?”

  
A jeep rolled up and two handlers lifted down a grill and a cooler. “A beach cookout. Hot dogs and hamburgers.” Dean felt Cas’ hand squeeze his.

  
Both tribes were excited about the prize. “Jodi and Charlie. You’re first up. Since Upolu won the last challenge, they get to roll first.”

  
Charlie spun the wheel and visibly gulped. “Blended Seafood Smoothie,” Jeff said and walked over to another bamboo table, where a blender sat. “Eel, octopus and coconut milk.”

  
Dean’s stomach lurched as the concoction whirled around in the blender. Jeff poured it into a glass and handed it to Charlie. A large pail was placed at her feet. She closed her eyes and began to drink. Halfway finished, she gagged, but kept going. When the glass was empty she looked at Jeff. He smiled at her and she returned to the tribe. Dean thought she looked a bit green, but he wisely kept his mouth shut.

  
Jodi spun the wheel and it landed on giant cockroach. Everyone groaned. Jeff pointed her to the table and she took her place by an empty plate. He opened a jar and dumped a thankfully, dead cockroach onto her plate. It was about an inch and a half long. Jodi picked it up and actually smiled as she crunched down on it. He heard Charlie heave behind him and saw Cas turn to rub her back.

  
“Upolu one, Savaii one. Next up, Benny and Cole.”

  
Benny’s spin landed on wild boar testicles. Dean’s hand unconsciously drifted to cover his junk. Benny stepped in front of a plate and Jeff opened another jar and two white ovals plotted onto the table. Benny stared at them , his Adam’s apple bobbing erratically. He already looked green. Carefully taking one between his thumb and forefinger, he brought it to his mouth. He gagged before he could even get it to his mouth. “Come on, Benny,” Dean mumbled. Benny tried again and with great effort, put it in his mouth. He chewed and his eyes watered. Less than a second later, the man upchucked into the bucket at his feet.

  
Cole took his place by the wheel. He got tarantula. After he took his place, Jeff brought over a plate and pushed a large black spider onto the table in front of Cole. The man looked at his with disgust and quickly stuffed the entire thing in his mouth. He chewed, hesitated, chewed some more and opened his mouth for Jeff to see that he’d swallowed it.

  
“Upolu one, Savaii two. Meg and Jo.”

  
Jo had to eat another giant cockroach, she got it close to her mouth and with a tearful apology to the tribe, she back away from the table. Meg choked down two beetle larvae.

  
“Upolu one, Savaii three. Dean and Victor.”

  
Dean didn’t even look at the wheel as it spun. “Wild boar testicles.” It was just his luck to get the same thing that took out Benny. He caught the smell of them when Jeff dropped them onto his plate. No wonder Benny gagged. They smelled nasty. He took several deep breaths and picked one up. It was chewy, like gristle and tasted worse than anything he’d ever put in his mouth. He got the one down and like a man facing his execution, he popped the other one in his mouth. As he teeth bit into it, liquid squirted out and Dean’s stomach rolled. He tasted the bile on top of the vile flavor in his mouth and he grabbed for the bucket. When he got back to the blue mat, Cas was there to rub his shoulders. One of the cameras stayed on them. Dean didn’t give a fuck.

  
Victor scarfed down the scorpion without hesitation.

  
“Upolu one, Savaii four. Cas and Cole.”

  
Cas gazed at the seafood smoothie with trepidation. He managed to get the thing down and keep it down. Cole wasn’t so lucky this time. He got the beetle larvae and since they were the only item that was still alive, it got to him and he tossed his stomach contents into the bucket.

  
“Upolu two, Savaii four. Garth and Victor”

  
Garth ate the tarantula with gusto. He even grinned at Jeff with two of the eight legs sticking out of his mouth. Dean had to turn away. Victor got the giant cockroach and he kept it down as well.

  
“Upolu three, Savaii five. Savaii wins this challenge. Upolu, return to camp and I will see you at tribal council.” Dean didn’t wait to listen to the cheers of the Savaii tribe. He led the quiet tribe back to their camp. Later that evening, he caught a whiff of grilled meat in the air and he flung a large rock across the lagoon in frustration.

  
“Dean, do you want to go for a walk?” Cas was beside him and he automatically leaned against the other man.

  
“No.”

  
“What about a swim?” Cas’ hands on his shoulders and back felt good, but didn’t ease the sense of failure. He’d let his tribe down.

  
“No, I’m good, Cas.”

  
“You are far from good, but if you want me to leave you alone, I will.” Dean turned so he could brush his lips against Cas’.

  
“No offense, Dude, but your breath is kind of gross.”

  
Instead of being offended, Cas chuckled. “A mouthwash of seafood parts will do that to you. Yours isn’t a bouquet of roses either.”

  
Dean smiled for the first time since losing the challenge. “When this is all over, we are going to share a hour long shower somewhere.”

  
“I’m on board with that. I feel nasty, but at least I can’t smell myself.”

  
Sniffing along Cas’ neck, Dean hummed. “I think I’ve gotten immune to the smell.”

  
The next day, no one wanted to discuss the tribal council. Cas and Dean walked along the beach as the sun was setting. “Who are we voting for?”

  
Dean shrugged. “It’s a lose-lose situation. I don’t want to write anyone’s name down.”

  
“Logically, Jo is still our weakest link until her ankle heals properly.”

  
“Yeah, but she’s…she’s…great.” Jo and Charlie made him wish he’d had a sister as well as Sammy.

  
Cas sat down in the sand, still warm from the sun, and pulled Dean down to sit next to him. Dean rested his elbows on his bent knees. “I just don’t know, Cas.”

  
They spent a long time whispering and watching the tide roll out. On the way back, Cas picked up a perfect scallop shell. It was only an inch in diameter and orange in color. He pocketed it.

  
Dawn brought a blanket of tension over the camp. Dean observed that unlike the seasons he’s watched in the past, where people broke into small groups to decide who to vote off, the Upolu tribe stayed together. They talked about their families and Jo had a few tears for her mother back in Nebraska.

  
“She can be a real bitch sometimes, you know? But she’s always there for me. She wants so much for me…like college, but I just wanted to do my own thing. Now, I get it…she just wants me to be set for real life.”

  
“Sammy’s the best. He’s a good kid…well, not so much a kid anymore. Growing up, we were all we had. I can’t imagine life without him.”

  
“My twin is a good man. He married his high school sweetheart and now they have twins. My nieces are…the closest I’ll probably ever get to kids. Hannah, his wife…she loves me for who I am. I’m lucky.”

  
“Andrea. What can I say? She’s the love of my life. She’ beautiful. When I left my job on the oil rigs to open a café, she supported my decision. Her parents told her I was worthless, but she stuck by me. I proved her parents wrong.”

  
“My mom and dad are great. Daddy’s a pastor at the First Baptist Church of Jackson Hole. Mom still makes a big Sunday dinner and for the holidays, she invites all the single deputies over and feeds them. She worries about me all the time and some say that I’m a mama’s boy, but I don’t care. They aren’t always going to be around. Plenty of time to find someone to marry later on.”

  
Dean looked at Charlie, who was quiet, head down, picking at her fingernails. “Charlie, what about you? Who’s waiting at home?”

  
“Mom’s in a home. She doesn’t even know I’m here,” she mumbled. “My girlfriend…she didn’t want me to do this. I’m not sure if she’ll be home or not.” Dean reached over and pulled her close. He didn’t press for more information. Jo made sure the conversation stayed away from families for the rest of the day.

  
Tribal council was going to be hard on everyone.

  
The next day was more of the same – sitting around talking quietly, working on the chores for the camp and eating what little food they had. Dean resented Savaii for the hamburgers. He really missed red meat.

  
From his spot near the fire, he could watch Cas listening to Charlie. She was waving her arms and smiling as she talked. He wished Seattle wasn’t that far from Austin. He’d miss her. He’d miss all of these people. Strangers that had somehow turned to friends. Cas caught him staring and he gave Dean that small half smile of his. He wasn’t sure what was going to happen when they got back to the real world, but he knew that he had to have Cas in his life somehow…some way.

  
As the sun set, the handler came to get them. The tribe picked up their torches.

  
Jeff stood by the podium as they walked in and took their seats. “Welcome back to tribal council, Upolu. I sense that tonight’s vote will be a hard one for you.” He got a few nods. “How’s the ankle, Jo?”

  
“Better. I’ve had a lot of help from my friends.”

  
Jeff inclined his head. “Friends? You really mean that, don’t you?”

  
“Yeah. These people aren’t just strangers anymore.” She smiled as Dean took her hand. Jeff caught the gesture and smiled too.

  
“Dean, was coming up with a name for tonight’s vote hard for you?”

  
“Hell, yeah,” he exclaimed. “No one deserves to go home.”

  
“Unfortunately, one of you will be leaving tonight.” The voting started and Dean was the fourth to go back to the small nook. He picked up the black marker and stared at the paper in front of him. With a heavy heart, he wrote a name. He held it up to the camera. “Garth, you are an awesome dude. When this is all over, I’d be proud to call you friend…you ever come to Texas, you got a place to stay.”

  
Jeff brought the container to the podium. “I’ll read the votes.”

  
He unfolded the first piece of paper.

  
“Castiel.” Dean’s eyes flew to Cas. Cas winked at him. That fucker wrote down his own name. He didn’t know whether he wanted to punch him or kiss him.

  
“Jo.” Jo squeezed his hand.

  
“Garth.” It was his. Garth nodded his acceptance.

  
“Garth. Two votes for Garth.”

  
“Jo. Two votes Jo. Two votes Garth.”

  
“Garth. The seventh person voted of Survivor Upolu. Garth, bring me your torch.” Garth stood up and each of his tribe took his hand. The men shook it strongly and the two women had tears in their eyes. Jeff snuffed the flame. “Garth, the tribe has spoken.”  
That night, long after everyone was asleep, Dean remained awake. “Dean?”

  
Dean turned his head towards Cas’ whisper. “Yeah?”

  
“We all miss him.”

  
“I know. It’s just…funny…I came here to kick ass and take names. I’ve watched Survivor since the first season. I know how to play the game. I just didn’t expect to care about these people.”

  
“Sometimes life surprises us,” Cas rolled to his side, facing Dean. “I didn’t come here expecting anything but bugs and a lack of toiletries, but I’ve found so much more.”

  
In the dim light, Dean took Cas’ hand and interlaced their fingers. “Me too,” he whispered. He stared at their hands pressed together. “No matter what happens from here on out, when this is all over, you and I are going to find a way to see each other.”

  
“I’d like that, Dean.” Their kiss was soft and Dean slept soundly, cradled against Cas’ chest.

  
The next challenge looked easy to Dean. Jeff pointed to the six platforms. After they decided to let Cas sit this one out so the tribes would be even, Jeff began to explain.

  
“Two tribe members will be in each canoe. The first canoe will race to the first platform and pick up the puzzle piece. You will paddle back to shore. Once you are completely out of the water, the second canoe will go to the second platform. You will repeat this until you have all the puzzle pieces. Once you do, the tribe will put the puzzle together. First one to complete the challenge wins immunity. Want to know what you’re playing for?”

  
The tribes whistled with enthusiasm. Jeff pulled a small cloth off of the table next to him. There was a laptop sitting on it. “Skype from your families back home.”

  
Dean felt a rush of emotion. Sammy. He’d be able to see and talk to Sammy. Winning this challenge became the single most important thing in his life…next to Cas…but he wasn’t allowed to think thoughts like that. He pushed them away and focused on hearing from his brother.

  
Benny and Jo were in the first canoe. They were up against Cole and Meg. They were well matched and both canoes hit the shore at the same time. Dean and Charlie pushed their canoe out and jumped in. Jodi and Victor pulled ahead of them, but Charlie had a plan. While she jumped up on the platform to get the piece of the puzzle, Dean turned the canoe. His paddle was in the water by the time her small frame jumped back into the boat. They were on shore a full minute before Savaii was. Their lead widened when Meg tipped their canoe.

  
Dean and Charlie had the last piece of the puzzle and they were out of the canoe before it was even beached. Benny and Jo met them at the table. “Let me take it,” Charlie said excitedly. Dean nodded and stepped back. He watched as she looked at the pieces carefully and then she started to put them together. Benny knocked against Dean’s elbow and he looked up. Jodi and Victor were putting their last piece on red table. Two pieces left. Charlie locked one into place and glanced up. Dean grinned at her and she snapped the last piece in its slot. Dean and Benny each grabbed one of her hands and raised it high. “Upolu wins,” Jeff yelled.

  
Cas ran over and the tribe hugged each other, Benny twirling Jo so hard he lifted her off her feet. Then he did the same with Charlie. Savaii looked miserable in their defeat, but it was hard for Dean to feel sorry for them.

  
Back at the camp, everyone was excited at the idea of talking to their loved ones, everyone but Charlie. Dean and Cas hovered around her. Cas got her talking about his books and he promised to develop a character based on her. She was thrilled and Dean fell just a little bit more for the blue-eyed man.

  
With a lot of fanfare, a few crew members came into camp and set up a large laptop, complete with generator and a satellite feed. As the time grew closer, the tribe gathered around. The technology looked so out of place in their camp that Dean had to laugh. After twenty-one days, he didn’t miss his smartphone or the Internet anymore.

  
Jeff strode into the camp with a clipboard and talked for several minutes to the cameramen and other crew members milling about. And just when the anticipation was fraying on their nerves, Jeff smiled at the camera and spoke.

  
“Upolu, congratulations on another win. Your reward was to see and speak with your loved ones. You’ll each get five minutes to Skype with our family members. Any questions?

  
They shook their heads. Jeff made a big deal about fiddling with the computer and he looked frustrated. Then he turned. “We seem to have some problems with the satellite feed.”

  
Dean’s face fell. Benny, the big, rough Cajun, looked ready to cry. Cas stared stoically straight ahead.

  
“So, we have a backup plan,” Jeff said cheerfully. He picked up a handheld radio and said, “Bring ‘em in.”

  
Dean and the rest of the Upolu tribe looked around in confusion. Where they bringing in more equipment? And then Dean saw his brother coming through the jungle. Who could miss that mop of hair on that Sasquatch body. “Sam…Sam…” Dean rose and ran. He was vaguely aware of his fellow tribe members crying out, but he only had eyes for Sam. He hugged his brother tightly and fought the tears that threatened to escape. “God, I’ve missed you.”

  
“I’ve missed you too, you big jerk. Fuck, Dean, you stink,” Sam teased. Dean was grateful to his brother for getting them back into their normal brother to brother banter. He didn’t want anyone to see how emotional he was. “So, how are you? You’ve lost weight…do you have food? Are the challenges as hard as they look on TV? The redhead is cute.”

  
Dean laughed. “I’m fine. We do have food, but not a lot. Mainly rice, fish, some fruit and dried beans. The challenges kick your ass, Dude. And Charlie plays for the other team. Now, Jo…she’s amazing. I’ll introduce you.”

  
He watched Sam appraise the blonde and nod. Dean took a moment to look around at his friends and their families. His eyes darted to Cas and he gulped. Cas’ twin was hot… Cas would look like that with after a date with soap, a razor and some toothpaste. They were talking animatedly and it was nice to see Cas grinning like an idiot.

  
There was a woman with Charlie. She was roughly the same age. Dean narrowed his eyes. They were talking, but not touching. Charlie looked intense, but happy. The other woman touched Charlie’s face intimately and Charlie leaned into the touch. Dean felt his eyes get misty.

  
Benny had his arms around a gorgeous woman with long dark hair. She looked Greek with her flawless olive skin. Damn, Benny had good taste in women.

  
Jo was with an older woman that Dean assumed was her mother. Jo was smiling and nodding at what her mother was saying.

  
Dean turned back to Sam, who was watching him intently. “These are great people, Sam. You’d love them. I wish you could have met Garth…Garth was this sawed off sheriff’s deputy. He was always hugging you and saying silly things, but he’d give his life for you…you know…”

  
Sam’s smile was warm and he said softly, “Dean, you’ve changed. What happened to my brother, the cocky asshole? Don’t get me wrong, I love you, but seriously…you’re…nice.”

  
“Yeah, well, fuck you too,” Dean said without any heat in his words. His eyes kept going back to Cas and his twin. He knew this was the perfect time, but had a hard time finding the words. “Sammy, I need to tell you something.”

  
“You’re pregnant,” Sam said with a roar of laughter. When Dean didn’t respond, Sam sobered. “What’s up?”

  
“I…I found someone.”

  
Sam looked perplexed. Dean could see the wheels turning. Sam was smart. There were only two women. He’d told Sam that one was a lesbian and offered to introduce Sam to the other. “So, is she from the other tribe?”

  
Dean looked down at his feet and shoved his hands into the pocket of his shorts. “It’s not a she.”

  
Sam was so quiet for so long that Dean had to look up. Sam was looking at him with a goofy smile on his face. “What?” Dean asked sharply.

  
“Dean, I’m just…just happy for you. I don’t care who you fall in love with. I’m just happy that you’re happy. So, who is it?” Then his face saddened. “Was it Garth?”

  
Dean snorted. “No, Dude. Garth was great…but seriously…” Dean let his eyes return to Cas. “It’s Cas.”

  
“Whose that with him?”

  
“His twin.”

  
“Damn, Dean, he’s hot…for a guy.”

  
“I know. And Cas looks just like him…well normally. And get this – he’s Castiel Novak.”

  
“The Castiel Novak. Your favorite author…Castiel Novak?”

  
Dean grinned. “Yep, the one and only,” Dean said with pride. “Come on, I want you to meet him.”

  
He led the way over to the edge of the jungle where Cas and his twin stood. As he neared them, he saw the similarities, not only in their looks, but mannerisms and expressions…even body language. Cas watched him approach, smiling softly. “Jimmy, this is Dean and I’m assuming that this is his brother, Sam.”

  
“Yeah, this is Sam,” Dean replied. Cas and Jimmy both shook Sam’s hand and then Jimmy faced Dean. Dean stuck out his hand and after a moment’s hesitation, he shook it.

  
“Since Castiel is standing here, I cannot give you the private ‘you hurt my brother and I’ll kill you’ speech, but it is implied,” Jimmy said dryly, his blue eyes penetrating. Cas nudged his brother.

  
“That’s enough, Jimmy.”

  
“No, Cas, it’s okay,” Dean said, his eyes still meeting Jimmy’s. “He’s got the right to say it.”

  
Jimmy inclined his head a fraction and nodded respectfully. The four men talked a few more minutes before Jeff called to them. “Okay, I hate to break this up, but it is time for your family members to leave. Say your goodbyes.”

  
Dean hugged Sam again. “Only eighteen more days, Dean.”

  
“I know. I’m okay. And Sam…look…please don’t tell anyone about Cas. I need to do that on my own.”

  
“I’ll have your back, Dean. You know that. You might be surprised at the support you’ll have from your friends.”

  
“Friends and family…I don’t worry about…my crew…that’s a little different.”

  
Sam clapped him on his back and the handlers led him away. The blue tribe members stood rooted to the spot watching the retreating backs of their family members. Dean had been so elated to see Sammy and now, it was like he was taken away. It hurt.

  
As they sat around the fire that night, they related the news from home. Talk then turned to the merge. With only one more challenge before the two tribes became one, they needed to finally talk about alliances. It was a given that Upolu would stick together until the end. As a fan of the show, Dean knew that plans didn’t always turn out the way you wanted them too.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The merge takes place.

Jeff and Crowley stared at the computer monitor. While final editing wouldn’t be done until they got back to the States, they could watch all the film within hours of when it was shot. Dean Winchester’s face filled the screen.

“Yeah.” Vivid green eyes looked into the camera. “I’m bisexual. I always have been, I guess. I don’t…look, no one really knows…alright? I came here to win a million bucks and…and I go and meet this amazing…funny…gorgeous man. He thinks I’m ashamed of him and who I am. I’m not…I’m not ashamed of him…never of him…I’m ashamed of hiding who I really am. So…that’s all I’ve got to say.”

“We don’t have to exploit him. He’s doing a great job all by himself,” Crowley said almost gleefully.

Jeff gave the other man a hard look. “We aren’t going to focus on this, Crowley. No more than if it was a straight couple anyway. We’ll continue to film as usual, but I’m not bringing Dean and Castiel’s relationship front and center.” Secretly, Jeff thought the couple would be great for ratings. In the dailies he’d watched, he knew the two men would be fan favorites. Hell, the whole Upolu tribe would be. In all his years of doing this show, he’d never seen a tribe bond like this one. It was painful to watch them vote Garth off the island.

***

The excitement from the family visit faded. The hours dragged on as the heat and the humidity sucked at the Upolu tribe’s energy. Cas and Dean spent more and more time alone…sometimes lying side by side on the bamboo platform…sometimes just lying on the beach. Dean was falling harder and harder with each hour that passed.

Because he was Dean, when Cas slept or was in confessional, he second guessed his feelings. He second guessed Cas’ feelings. What if this was just two people bonding during a stressful situation. Now, at this point in time, he couldn’t imagine his life without Cas. He wanted to go to sleep with him every night and wake to him every morning. He knew that being together was going to create challenges. Cas lived in Boston. Dean lived in Texas. It wasn’t out of the realm of possibilities for either of them to move, but Dean would have a harder time with his job. Cas was a writer, he could write anywhere. Couldn’t he? But would it be fair to make him uproot his life just because of that?

He felt the brush of a hand on his back. “I can almost hear you thinking.”

Dean forced a smile and turned for a kiss. “Does Jimmy live in Boston too?”

“He does,” Cas tilted his head. “Why do you ask?”

“Just curious.” Yeah, asking Cas to move wouldn’t be fair. What were they going to do?

“Tree mail.” Jo’s shout brought Dean out of his thoughts. The five remaining members of the Upolu tribe gathered together.

**_“Two become one today,_ **   
**_Time to be careful what you do and say.”_ **

“So, we merge today,” Benny said, his hands rising up to grip the shoulders of Jo and Dean. They all knew the game was about to change.

Within minutes, their handler walked into camp. “You need to take all your personal belongings to the beach today. We’ll be meeting at the truck in thirty minutes.”

The ragtag group silently moved down the path to the truck, each holding their small cloth bags. For Dean, his personal items included a couple of shells, bug spray and sunscreen. He carried his torch in his right hand.

Jeff greeted them on the same beach they’d landed twenty-seven days previously. “Upolu, take a look at Savaii. Meg Masters was voted off at the last tribal council. That leaves the Savaii tribe with three surviving member. Upolu has five. Today you will become one tribe. From now on, you will participate in individual challenges. The winner will not only get a reward, but a immunity necklace. They cannot be voted off that the tribal council. Savaii, Upolu, take off your buffs.”

Dean untied the dirty blue buff from around his head and stuffed it in his bag. Jeff held up bright green buffs in his fist. “From today forward, you are the Tutuila tribe. Come get your new buffs.”

The clean clothes looked out of place against their dirty skin and clothing. Dean rolled his up and tied it in place.

“Tomorrow you will face your first challenge as an individual, not a tribe. Your first order of business today will be to visit each tribe’s camp. Decide, as a tribe, which one is the best. You have the rest of the day to move and become one tribe. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Jeff got into a jeep and it took off down the beach.

The new Tutuila tribe stared at one another. “So, I guess we need to do this, huh?” Dean spoke since no one else seemed to want to take charge.

“Let’s go to the Savaii camp first,” suggested Charlie. Victor shrugged and they began their hike. It took close to thirty minutes to walk to the Savaii camp. Dean was all set to hate it, but he was impressed. The red tribe had found a large rock overhang that acted as their roof. They made panels out of bamboo to give it sides and protect them from the weather. They also built a platform to keep them off the ground, but their reward of blankets and pillows made it look like a four star hotel to Dean.

Over to the side, Savaii took the wooden crates the chickens had come in and turned them on their sides. All but two of the chickens remained and were pecking around at the edge of the jungle. Eggs. Dean’s mouth watered.

Dean met Benny and Cas’ eyes and they used silent communication to give their approval. “Okay, you guys have a great set up here. The only thing we have going for us is the lagoon. It’s a great place to catch fish and lobster.”

“There is a small beach about two clicks through those trees. We’ve caught lots of crab there,” Cole, the ex-marine informed him. “With your fishing gear, we could probably catch enough to feed us all.”

“We in agreement then?” Dean asked.

Everyone nodded. “I guess we need to get over to our camp and collect our supplies,” Jo suggested. The hike back to the beach and then along the trail to the Upolu tribe took an hour and during that time, the new tribe got to know each other a little better. Dean especially liked Jodi. He developed a healthy respect for both Victor and Cole. He also saw them as his biggest threats physically.

At the Upolu camp, they gathered the tarps, the fishing gear and the cooking supplies. Dean carried the remaining bag of dried beans and the rest of the things were divvied up between the others. By the time they made it back to the Savaii camp, night was falling. Benny and Charlie volunteered to cook rice and beans for dinner. Dean, Cole and Cas hung the tarps over the bamboo sides of the shelter making it completely rainproof.

The two fractured tribes remained leery of each other even as they ate. Dean, as was their custom, pulled Cas to his feet and went for a walk.

***

The three remaining Savaii tribe members watched them go. Victor opened his mouth, but before he could speak, Benny softly said, “My mama always told me that if you couldn’t say anything nice about someone, you keep your mouth shut. I’ve always tried to live by those words.”

Jodi smiled and said, “They make an attractive couple. I remember how they both looked on that first day, clean-shaven…clean…sexy as hell.” At Cole’s pout, she nudged his leg. “I thought you and Victor were hot too. Don’t go getting your panties in a bunch.”

“I think those two are in it for the long haul,” Charlie informed Savaii.

“Before I was interrupted, I was just going to ask how long they’d been together and how they were handling the camera crawling all over the place.”

“I apologize then,” Benny conceded. “Dean and Cas are just good people and I just didn’t want any shit.”

“I get that,” Victor said. “I’m not homophobic, just so you know.”

***

“What do you think about the Savaii tribe?” Dean asked, as the two men followed an unknown path. The cameraman trailed behind them, so Dean figured he wouldn’t allow them to get lost.

“They seem nice. I really like Jodi.” Cas tightened his hand around Dean’s as they stepped over some rocks.

“Yeah, she’s pretty cool. I’m worried about Victor and Cole.”

“Why are you worried?” Cas stopped and turned to face Dean.

“They’re strong, both have either a police or military background. They are the competition, Cas.”

“What happens if you don’t win?” Dean shrugged and pulled Cas forward so they could keep walking.

“I go back to the department. Nothing will change. Sammy will still be in debt up to his eyeballs.”

“Could you be happy like that?”

“What? Without a million bucks?” Dean shrugged and leaned against Cas. “Yeah, as long as you were around.”

“I plan on being around,” Cas murmured and kissed him. The kiss deepened and Dean’s hands wrapped around Cas’ back, pulling him closer. Dean’s cock was hardening and he broke the kiss.

“We can’t do this now,” he whispered against Cas’ ear, safe in the knowledge the microphone couldn’t possibly hear his words.

They leaned against each other until their breathing returned to normal.

The next day, the blended tribe found their footing as a cohesive team. The chores were completed, the food made and eaten and they broke into small groups to talk. Dean, Jodi and Victor sat against a fallen tree and talked about their jobs. Dean kept an eye on Cas, who was talking to Cole. He wasn’t jealous, after all, the other man was married with kids. He was just protective. He knew Upolu didn’t care about their relationship, but Savaii might be homophobic dicks for all Dean knew.

“We’ve got tree mail,” Jodi’s voice rang out. The three women had actually bonded somewhat and had wandered off earlier to refill the canteens.

**_“How long can you stand in one place,_ **   
**_Outlast the others, finish the race.”_ **

They had no sooner read the rolled up clue when a handler appeared. “Let’s go, people. This challenge may take awhile.”

The truck took them to a small clearing. Jeff stood next to eight poles sticking out of the ground about three feet. Tutuila gathered around him.

“Tutuila, today’s challenge may sound easy. It’s all about endurance. You will each stand on one of these poles. The person who can stand the longest wins immunity and a prize. Want to know what you’re playing for?”

With a sweep of his hand, he revealed a bag of coffee and a camping size coffee pot with one cup. “Coffee. You can keep it to yourself or share, it’s up to you.”

The murmuring of the tribe was comical to Jeff because he laughed. “Craving the caffeine, huh, guys?”

“You have no idea,” Dean muttered.

The Tutuila members took their places. The flat, round surface of the pole was about ten inches in diameter. With Dean’s sandals on, his feet barely fit, so he used his good sense of balance to stand on one foot at a time to remove his shoes. He tossed them to the ground and placed his feet side by side. Seeing what Dean did, others attempted it. Victor had one off and was pulling at the Velcro strap on the other when he lost his balance.

“Victor, you’re out.” Dean winced. The poor guy didn’t even get a chance to try to win. Victor stomped over to a large log, Dean assumed was for them to sit on as they went down, one by one.

He wasn’t sure how much time passed, but his feet were killing him. Cas’ eyes were set on something on the horizon. Dean could tell Jo was in trouble. She wasn’t putting a lot of weight on her bad ankle and she was swaying.

“It’s been twenty minutes. Are you tired yet?” Jeff called out to them. Since the cameramen were filming the contestants, Jeff got to go sit in a jeep and drink cool bottled water between the times where he needed to be seen and heard.

With a pissed off grunt, Jo jumped to the ground, using her good leg to take her weight. She stumbled and fell, but picked herself up quickly. Dean felt for her as he watched her hobble to the log to take her place beside Victor.

“Forty minutes,” Jeff told them. Dean wasn’t sure what happened, but he heard a startled cry from his left and saw Jodi on the ground, on her knees.

Dean’s feet were killing him. He tried lifting one for a little while, but it didn’t help. “Shit,” Benny exclaimed as he jumped off.

“Sixty minutes. You’ve been standing for an hour.”

By the two hour mark, it was just Cas, Dean and Cole. Dean looked over, Cas was still staring straight ahead, Dean didn’t think he’d moved an inch since the challenge started. Cole was shifting his weight from foot to foot.

“One hour, twenty minutes.”

Dean felt the cramp start in his left calf muscle. He lifted his heel up, putting all the weight on the ball of his foot. The cramp intensified. He landed on his hands and knees. “Damn it,” he cursed and limped over to the log. It was just Cas and Cole. Now that Dean had a chance to just observe, he realized Cas was in some sort of trance.

“He hasn’t moved at all,” Victor whispered. “Does he do yoga?”

“Fuck if I know,” Dean responded. Yoga? He remembered dating a yoga instructor at one time…she was bendy. The sex was great. Did Cas do yoga? Was Cas bendy? Little Dean appeared very interested in the answer to that question.

“One hour, forty minutes.”

“Two hours.” Dean’s ass was getting sore from sitting on the hard log. Cole was obviously in trouble. Dean could see him trembling from where he sat. Cas remained still and focused.

Cole dropped to the ground, rolling easily on his side.

“Castiel wins immunity,” Jeff said.

Dean jumped up and pumped his fist in the air. His boyfriend won immunity. His boyfriend. The term wasn’t as scary as he thought it would be.

Castiel jumped down and his legs buckled. Dean ran forward and helped ease him to the ground. “You okay, Babe?” Jo, Charlie and Benny ran forward and knelt around them.

“I’m fine, just a bit stiff.”

“How did you do that? Charlie asked, rubbing his shoulders.

“I just meditated. It’s easy to remove yourself from discomfort if you can train your mind to focus on positive things.”

“Like winning coffee,” Dean teased.

Cas’ eyes met Dean’s. “No, you.”

“Ahhh,” Charlie and Jo sighed at the same time.

Dean felt his face grow hot. “Sappy bastard,” he muttered, but he was all warm inside. And so what if he leaned in to kiss the man.

Back at the Savaii camp, the Tutuila tribe settled in. Cas took the snorkel, while the other men took the fishing gear to the secluded beach. Jo made a few remarks about them being sexist asshats, but Cole just grinned at her and said, “It’s male bonding time.”

With Cas under the water, the remaining men stood at the shoreline casting the lines and hoping for a bite. “Have y’all decided which one of us you’re voting off?”

Dean cut his eyes over to Cole. “We haven’t talked about it,” Dean said honestly. Before the merge, the plan was to stay loyal to Upolu. He was okay with that, but he wasn’t sure what the rest of the tribe planned. It wasn’t his business. He was just happy that Cas was safe.

“Come on, you know you’re going to pick us off one by one,” Victor responded. There was no anger in his voice, just a touch of resignation.

“What Dean said is true. We haven’t picked any one person,” Benny said defensively.

The conversation did get Dean thinking about it though. His strategy was to vote either Cole or Victor off. He needed to talk to Cas…and Charlie…hell, Benny and Jo too.

After they ate that night, Cas brewed a pot of coffee. Without sugar and cream, they’d have to settle to drink it black…that is if Cas was going to share. But it was Cas, so he did share with everyone. Each person that wanted one, got a half cup. Dean, used to drinking his black, savored each swallow. The jolt from the caffeine came soon after. He felt jittery.

Hyped up on the small amount of stimulant, the tribe didn’t want to go to sleep. Charlie hadn’t taken any, so she was ready for bed not long after the sun was completely gone. She gave them a wave goodnight and crawled into the shelter. Cas and Dean stood for their nightly walk.

“We need to vote for either Cole or Victor tomorrow,” Dean whispered when the got to the secluded beach.

“I agree,” Cas replied. He pulled Dean down to the sand.

“I think Cole should be first, since he is the strongest.”

“Whatever you say, Dean,” Cas murmured, his hands roaming up and down Dean’s naked back.

Dean chuckled. “What’s going on, Cas?” He looked around quickly and spotted the camera, he leaned in to whisper in Cas’ ear. “Horny?”

“You have no idea what you do to me, Dean. All during the challenge, I was thinking of the two of us. Making love in a real bed. Being clean shaven with fresh breath…kissing, touching. I can’t remember ever wanting a man more.”

The kiss that followed was hard and filled with pent up passion. Dean forgot about the cameras and let his hands and mouth communicate his need to Cas. The snap of Cas’ shorts gave way under his fingers and he pushed the zipper down. Reaching in, he wrapped his hand around Cas’ shaft. Cas thrust into his fist. “God, Dean…”

“Come on, Babe. Let go…just let go…” Cas’ hips bucked and his scent filled Dean’s nostrils. Cas was slick with precum and Dean’s hand moved quickly. Cas’ ragged breathing was loud even over the sound of the surf. “Come for me…”

Dean muffled Cas’ shout with his mouth. His body blocked the camera angle. Dean knew it was pretty damn obvious what they were doing, but he was still going to keep Cas’ release private.

“Dean…”

“Shhhh, let’s go in the water.” Dean helped him up and Cas let his shorts fall to the ground. Dean stripped out of his shorts and flung them on top of Cas’. Hand in hand, they ran into the water. Once they were out to their shoulders, they stopped. Fortunately for the couple, the cameraman couldn’t follow them out.

Dean pulled Cas close and rutted against his upper thigh. He needed to come. He felt like a dog in heat, rubbing his cock up and down. “Cas…Cas…”

“Easy, Dean…wait…” Cas took Dean’s cock in his hand and fitted it between his thighs. “Now, Dean…”

It took Dean a few tries to get into a rhythm. The salt water didn’t help the situation, but the friction felt so good. “Damn…Fuck…can’t wait to get you into my bed…fucking into you…sucking your cock…Cas…Jesus…” Dean was close, his body jerked as his orgasm caused white heat to erupt. He hissed as he came. Cas’ arms held him as he came down.

They held each other as the swells gently pushed them towards shore. Naked and sated, they emerged from the sea. The view from the camera lens caught just their silhouettes against the blue backdrop of the moon.


	10. Chapter 10

Dean planned on talking to each of the Upolu tribe about voting off Cole, but life threw a curve ball. They just finished eating breakfast when it began to storm. That meant the entire tribe sat in the shelter. There would be no private conversations. He just prayed his tribe thought like he did.

  
The hours dragged. They couldn’t cook anything, but they did get some fruit to share. The tribe talked and even laughed some. Cas leaned against the back wall with Dean’s back pressed against his chest. Dean loved feeling the vibrations from Cas’ chest when the author laughed at something someone said.

  
Dean must have napped, because Cas was shaking him awake. Rubbing his eyes, he looked around. It was dark out and the handler was ushering everyone to get their torches and personal belongings just in case they were voted off.

  
As they took their seats, Jeff looked at each of them. “How have things been since the merge? Victor?”

  
“Good. We get along. No drama so far.” Cole, Jodi and Victor regaled them with stories earlier about the drama that plagued the Savaii tribe. It seemed that Bela and Meg were bitches, Kevin whined about everything and Gabe was a practical joker and it had gotten old very fast.

  
“Charlie, what about you? Merge going okay?”

  
“Yes. Like Victor said. No drama.”

  
“Okay, before we vote, I want to remind everyone that Castiel has immunity. He cannot be voted off tonight.” Jeff finished his spiel and one by one, they got up to vote. Dean wrote down Cole’s name and looked at the camera.

  
“No offense, Dude, but my tribe comes first.”

  
Cas was the last to vote. He sat down next to Dean and Jeff brought the container out to the podium. “Let’s tally the votes.”

  
“Benny.”

  
“Cole.” That was his handwriting. He risked a glance at Cas. Cas winked.

  
“Benny. Two votes Benny.”

  
“Victor.” Damn it, someone didn’t get the unspoken vibes Dean sent out.

  
“Jodi.” Dean’s mind scrambled. He began doing math in his head and it wasn’t working out.

  
“Cole. Two votes Cole. Two votes Benny.” That was Cas’. Dean was sure of it.

  
“Victor. Two votes Benny. Two votes Cole. Two votes Victor.”

  
“The ninth person voted off Survivor Upolu. Benny. Benny, bring me your torch.” Dean sat stunned. How had this happened? Cas took his hand and gave it a squeeze. Benny stood in front of Jeff and with his usual flair, he said, “Benny, the tribe has spoken.”

  
Benny turned to them. “It’s been a pleasure.”

  
Dean was pissed off. This was all his fault. If he would have got his shit together, he would have talked to the tribe earlier…made sure they were on the same page. Now, Benny was gone. That was fucked up. His resentment for Cole grew.

  
Back at camp, things were tense. Cas was trying to keep Dean grounded, but every time he looked at Cole, his temper would flair. Finally, Charlie took his hand and told the tribe, they were going to fill the water bottles. It wasn’t something they usually did after dark, but no one argued.

  
“Dean, what is going on?”

  
“I let Benny down,” Dean said tersely.

  
Charlie looked perplexed. “Huh? How did you let him down?”

  
“Instead of being in my own little world, I should have been talking strategy with Upolu.”

  
“Yeah, well maybe we dropped the ball, but it wasn’t your fault, Dean. We were all guilty of it.” Knowing she was being logical didn’t help Dean’s mood.

  
After tossing and turning for what seemed like hours, Dean felt a hand on his arm. “Come with me,” Cas said sleepily. He followed Cas out of the shelter and down the path to the secluded beach. The cameraman was right behind them.

  
“Dean, you’ve got to let this go. This is a game and tonight was a loss for us. It was no one’s fault.” He wrapped his arms around Dean and Dean clung to him.

  
“You’re right,” Dean finally whispered, all the anger draining from him. It was only a game. He had to keep telling himself that.

  
“We need to sleep,” Cas said softly against his cheek. Dean felt his lips brushing over his skin, at the shell of his ear, at the juncture where his neck met his shoulder. Eyes closed, Dean relished this moment.

  
When Dean awoke, he was confused. It took him a few seconds to realize that they must have fallen asleep on the beach last night. “Cas…wake up.”

  
Cas muttered something in his sleep and rolled away. Dean shook his arm. “Cas, come on…the tribe will be wondering where we are.”

  
“Fuck ‘em,” came Cas’ reply. Dean chuckled.

  
It took a lot of poking and prodding to get the other man awake and moving. Sand clung to both of them and Dean suggested a quick dip in the water before they headed back.

  
Five sets of eyes and two cameras met them when they strolled into camp. They were still dripping from their morning swim. Charlie and Jo grinned. “Morning, bitches,” Charlie called out. “We have tree mail already.”

  
Dean took the rolled paper from her and angled it so Cas could read it too.

  
**_“Find the pieces, ten in all,_**  
 ** _Put them together, and then it’s your call.”_**

  
“Some sort of puzzle…maybe?” Dean said.

  
“Yeah, that’s what we thought,” Victor replied.

  
They prepared a meal and Dean’s load moan of pleasure over the eggs caused everyone to chuckle. Thankfully, the tension from the previous night was gone. A handler took them one at a time for confessional. They posed Dean sitting on the sandy beach, waves crashing behind him.

  
“How as the merge impacted your strategy?”

  
“Like I’ve said before, Upolu didn’t really have a strategy. An alliance was talked about early in the game, but once we got to know each other…well, it’s hard to plot against friends. With the merge, we knew we needed to pick the Savaii tribe off one by one, but last night’s tribal council backfired on us. It was definitely a failure to communicate.”

  
“I’m sure the viewers want to know how your relationship with Cas is going. Care to elaborate?”

  
“Cas and I are good. I want what we have to be private…or as private as it came be with cameras on us all the time. We’re still learning about each other.”

  
Dean wondered if she asked Cas the same question.

  
When the tribe walked out onto the beach later that afternoon, they saw seven roped off circles and a bit further down, seven different colored tables. Jeff stood in front of them.

  
“Today’s challenge is about both speed and logic. You will dig for ten puzzle pieces in the sand, every time you find one, you must run to your table and deposit the piece. Once you have all ten parts to the puzzle, you can start to work on it. Whoever finishes first wins immunity and a reward. Want to know what you’re playing for?”

  
The survivors tried to act enthusiastic per the handler’s instructions, but it was half-hearted at best.

  
“Turn around,” Jeff’s tone tried to make up for the contestants lack of excitement. The tribe turned and coming up the beach was a bright red convertible. “The winner’s reward will be a brand new, 2015 Ford Mustang.”

  
All around him, the tribe was jumping and cheering. Dean shrugged. It was nice, but it was a Ford and he was a Chevy kind of guy. And seriously, nothing was taking the place of his baby. If he won, he’d more than likely give it to Sam. Cas, too, wasn’t acting all crazy about it.

  
“What’s that matter, Cas. You can’t see yourself driving around in that, with the wind blowing through your hair.” Okay, so, Cas would look hot behind the wheel of that car.

  
“I have a ’64 ragtop Lincoln Continental. I wouldn’t really need a car like that.”

  
Dean was in shock. How had he not known Cas had a classic car. “A ’64 ragtop Continental…Cas, will you marry me?”

  
Cas grinned. “Maybe one day.” They both knew the joke for what it was, but as the game started and he dug for the pieces, Dean thought about marriage…to Cas.

  
All around him, sand flew as the survivors dug up the beach. Dean already had six pieces. He wasn’t keeping up with anyone else. He could hear Jeff’s running commentary, but paid no attention. He found his seventh piece and raced to the orange table that matched his orange pieces. He tossed it down and turned. He was halfway back with is eighth piece when he heard Jeff say Jodi had all her pieces and was beginning to put her puzzle together.

  
“Fuck,” he muttered and ran back to the roped off circle that was his. Dropping to his knees, he shifted through the sand until his hands bumped another piece. Once he slapped the piece onto the table, he took a half second to look at Jodi. She was bent over her puzzle working furiously. Charlie and Cas were working their puzzles too.

  
“One more…one more…one more…” he chanted. His toes hit something and he whooped when he saw the tenth piece.

  
By the time he got to his table, all the survivors except Jo and Victor were working on their puzzles. He stared down at the funny shapes and began to piece them together. Two…three…”

  
“Jodi wins immunity,” Jeff shouted.

  
Cole and Victor hugged her and the Upolu tribe offered congratulations. Jeff handed her the keys and she got behind the wheel for a photo op.

  
Dinner consisted of fish and rice. The remaining beans had gotten wet and molded. Dean’s shorts hung off his hips. If he lost any more weight, they’d be down around his ankles. He went to bed hungry.

  
The next morning, he was determined to talk to his tribe about the tribal council. He motioned for Cas and Charlie to follow him into the jungle. Jo was talking to Jodi and didn’t see him trying to get her attention.

  
When they’d made it to a small clearing near the well where they got their fresh water, Dean halted and looked behind them. The coast was clear.

  
“Victor or Cole?” Dean asked Charlie.

  
“Either,” she answered without hesitation.

  
“I want Cole gone,” Dean said with conviction.

  
“Okay, so Cole it is. I’ll make sure Jo knows.”

  
“We need to be on the same page this time. Last vote was a cluster fuck.” Charlie nodded in agreement. Upolu, or what was left of them, was still reeling from losing Benny.

  
The moon was full for the tenth tribal council. “Seven remain. Tonight, the first member of the jury will join us. Benny.”

  
Dean grinned when Benny came down the ramp and took his place behind Jeff on a padded bench. He was clean and dressed in jeans, a white button down and he was wearing a cap.

  
“Jodi has immunity and cannot be voted off tonight. Jo, you’re up.” Jo was barely limping now and Dean watched her disappear into the voting nook. Cole went next…then Cas…Dean was called last. He wrote the name on the paper and held it up to the camera.

  
“Like I said before, Buddy, nothing personal.”

  
Dean took his seat and Jeff began reading the votes.

  
“First vote, Cole.”

  
“Cole.”

  
“Dean.” Dean looked sharply at the three Savaii tribe members who sat side by side.

  
“Dean. Two votes Cole. Two votes Dean.”

  
“Cole. Three votes Cole. Two votes Dean.”

  
“Dean. Three votes Cole. Three votes Dean.” Battle lines had been drawn. At least Jodi looked guilty.

  
“The tenth person voted of Survivor Upolu…Cole.” Dean breathed a sigh of relief. Cas gripped his hand and held it. “Cole, bring me your torch.”

  
Cole looked angry, but he stood up and carried his torch to Jeff. Jeff extinguished it and said, “Cole, the tribe has spoken.”

  
That night, the tribe ate together. With only eight more days, they voted on killing one of the chickens. The only argument came because none of them wanted to be the one to do it. Finally, Victor snatched up the machete. Dean helped him catch one of the hens and held it. With a horrible crunch, the bird was sacrificed for dinner. It took all of them to figure out how to pluck the feathers off and clean it.

  
The game was moving faster now. Tribal council was closely followed by a challenge with no off days in between. It was an emotional roller coaster for all of them. Dean was counting the days now. Eight. Eight more days until the final tribal council. He looked at Cas and traded a smile with him.

  
After the last vote, they’d be put up at a hotel in Pago Pago for two days before flying home. Two days in a hotel with Cas…a hotel with a shower…and toothbrushes…heaven.

  
Cas and Dean laid down side by side in the shelter. “Cas?”

  
“Yes.”

  
“We only have eight more days.”

  
“If we are lucky. I could be voted off next, Dean.”

  
“Don’t even say that,” Dean scoffed. “I just want you to know that I want you and me in the final two. And if you win…I’m cool with it.”

  
Cas leaned his forehead against Dean’s. “I never thought I get this far, Dean. I’m happy that I did this. I’m happy I met you.”

  
“There’s a part of me that doesn’t want this to end…” Dean let his voice trail off. How could he ask a man he’d know thirty days about future plans?

  
“It doesn’t have to end, Dean. I want to continue this…with you.”

  
“Yeah…me too,” Dean said, letting his head drop to Cas’ chest. He fell asleep to the steady heartbeat of the man he was falling in love with.

  
Morning brought tree mail. Victor read it out loud.

  
**_“Aim true, a stone away,_**  
 ** _Maybe a wash. Who’s to say?”_**

  
“Like that makes sense. Who makes up this shit?” Dean muttered. “Are we throwing stones or what?”

  
“Who know?” Charlie agreed.

  
They found out soon enough. At a clearing, a large rope net was strung up and ceramic tiles were tied to it. Each player was given a slingshot and a bucket of round stones. Jeff explained the rules to them and then asked, “Want to know what you’re playing for?”

  
He lifted a cloth off of a small table. On the table sat a bar of soap, shampoo, toothpaste and a toothbrush.

  
“I want,” Charlie’s voice was small, but it made everyone laugh. Dean never thought he’d see the day where he’d almost kill to brush his teeth.

  
Dean was pretty good with a slingshot. He remembered his dad giving him one for his tenth birthday. Bobby set up a bunch of old beer cans and he practiced for hours on end. It was no surprise when he won the challenge.

  
That night at camp, he and Cas slipped away and walked the two miles back to Upolu’s original camp. They stripped out of their clothes and sank into the water and washed each other’s hair. Dean scrubbed himself clean with the bar of citrus smelling soap before passing it to Cas. Once they finished bathing, Dean brushed his teeth. His gums bled and were sore, but he didn’t care. He waited patiently for Cas to brush his. Using the same toothbrush was kind of gross, but they’d swapped spit enough times with their nasty mouths that this seemed like a normal thing to do.

  
Cas carefully laid the toothbrush down on the flat rock were the rest of the toiletries rested. The two men stared at each other, soft smiles on their lips. Dean growled and wrapped his naked body around Cas. In the back of his mind, he knew the cameras were still rolling, but they wouldn’t show nudity on prime time television. Everyone watching would know what they were doing, but no one would see the intimate details.

  
They lay in the soft grass by the lapping water of the lagoon. Dean began kissing Cas’ neck and he loved the soft noises he was making. Slowly, he worked his way over Cas smooth, tan skin. He took a nipple into his mouth and sucked it gently. Cas’ back arched off the ground. Dean knew the exact moment when Cas remembered the cameras. He stiffened and pushed at Dean. “Stop…Dean…we can’t…not like this.”

  
Dean wasn’t an exhibitionist, not by a long shot, but he’d waited so long…been so fucking horny for Cas that he whimpered in frustration. As if Cas read his mind, the older man cupped Dean’s face. “I want our first time to be private…preferably in a soft bed.”

  
He couldn’t help it, Dean laughed…he threw back his head and roared. Cas grinned and shook his head. “I’m glad you find it funny.”

  
As he wiped away the tears and stopped laughing enough to talk he explained. “I was just picturing us in a porn movie. Two men, shipwrecked on a deserted island…jungle porn.” That got him going again.

  
They were almost back at camp when Dean turned to the cameraman, startling him. “Dude, maybe you could send me that footage.” The cameraman looked scandalized and Cas bopped him on the back of his head.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will try to get another chapter up tomorrow and maybe one this weekend, if I'm lucky. I will be leaving for a conference in New Orleans on Monday afternoon, so I won't get much writing done. I'm begging your forgiveness in advance.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time moves on...strangers that have become friends are voted off...Cas and Dean get closer.

It was getting harder and harder to find alone time with his tribe to discuss voting. Everyone respected his time alone with Cas, but if he wanted to talk to Jo, it seemed like Victor or Jodi was within earshot. Since Jo and Charlie seemed to like Jodi, Victor was the obvious choice. At least he hoped so.

  
Jeff’s gaze moved over them. “It’s down to six. Castiel, you’ve been flying under the radar…are you nervous about tonight’s vote?”

  
“I am, Jeff. I think we all are.”

  
“Dean, it was a tight vote at the last tribal council. You have immunity for this vote. Without it, do you think you’d be on the chopping block?”

  
“Like Cas basically said, it could be anyone.”

  
“Okay, let’s bring out the jury. Benny and Cole, who was voted off during the last tribal council.”

  
Benny and Cole entered the area. Both looking clean, shaven and in regular clothes. They said on the designated bench.

  
“Charlie, you’re up first,” Jeff said, indicating the voting nook. Charlie rose and disappeared behind the partition.

  
When it was Dean’s turn, he picked up the pen and wrote Victor’s name. Looking at the camera, he said, “You seem like a great guy, Victor. Good luck, Man.” He returned to his stool and waited while Jeff collected the container that held the votes.

  
“First vote…Castiel.” Damn, the Savaii members were really ruthless. If they couldn’t vote him off, they picked on his boyfriend.

  
“Victor.”

  
“Victor. That’s two votes Victor.”

  
“Castiel. Two votes Victor. Two votes Castiel.” The person who voted spelled Cas’ name wrong. For some reason, that really pissed Dean off. If you’re going to throw someone under the bus, at least you can learn how to spell their fuckin’ name. Dean conveniently forgot that he didn’t have a clue how to spell Cas’ name until he saw it engraved on Cas’ torch.

  
“Victor.”

  
Jeff unfolded the last piece of parchment paper and turned it to the camera. “The eleventh person voted of Survivor Upolu…Victor. Victor, bring me your torch.”

  
Dean saw Jodi hang her head. Victor held his head high, posture straight, and approached Jeff with his torch. Once the flame was out, Jeff repeated his catchphrase, “Victor, the tribe has spoken.”

  
“Tutuila, I will see you tomorrow for another challenge. You can head back to camp.”

  
It was nice to see Jo and Charlie walking with Jodi. It wasn’t the woman’s fault she was picked for the Savaii tribe. In another time and another place, Dean could have been friends with her. She was the type of woman who treated you like her kid…she always asked everyone if they got enough to eat…or were they drinking enough water.

  
With their numbers dwindling, the tribe had more space to sleep, but Cas and Dean remained wrapped around each other. Dean let his fingertips trail softly up and down Cas’ sides, over his prominent ribs, down to his hipbones, lower to his outer thigh. Up and down in a lazy way that was more affectionate than passionate.

  
Dean was slowly realizing that without a real sexual relationship, he was actually getting to know Cas. His likes and dislikes. Things they had in common. Things that made him laugh. Things he hated. Who could hate peanut butter?

  
Another morning…another challenge.

  
**_“Balance is the key,_**  
 ** _If you want to get to the final three.”_**

  
Dean peered over Jodi’s shoulder, reading the words again. “Come on, Bitches, I’m hungry,” Charlie said from the firepit.

  
Jo had gathered the eggs that morning and they had four to split between them. Cas brought back some fruit. The rice rounded out their meal. Cas also made coffee. The small bag wasn’t going to last much longer. They rationed it so they each got a half cup every morning. Dean watched Cas using his t-shirt to lift the hot pot off the fire. It struck him…Cas was just a really nice person.

  
Strangely enough, the truck picked them up and took them to their old camp. It had been dismantled and now the area looked like no one had ever been there. There was still scorch marks in the dirt from their fire, but everything else looked pristine. The lagoon had a few new additions though.

  
Six tall posts stuck out of the water. Between the posts, suspended by rope were five logs, raised about six inches out of the water.

  
After Jeff greeted them, he explained the rules. “You will swim out to the posts, pull yourself up onto the log and stand on it. You must balance there for as long as you can. Want to know what you’re playing for?”

  
“The winner will be taken away right after the challenge is over. You will be taken by boat to the Tradewinds Resort for a night in a luxury hotel room. Shower, watch some television, have some room service. The boat will bring you back tomorrow morning.”

  
Dean thought this was probably the best reward Jeff had offered. The women were practically frothing at the mouth. “The winner can pick one other survivor to go with them if they want, but it’s not mandatory.”

  
Cas was suddenly grinning at him. If Cas won…if he won…holy crap…

  
“Ready?” Jeff moved out of the way. “Go.”

  
Dean raced to the rocks and dove cleanly into the water. He struck out at a fast pace. He got to the log right after Cas got to his. He noticed Cas wasn’t pulling himself up and wondered why and then hit him. The faster you get on the log, the longer you’ll have to balance. So, they waited until the last woman made it to her log.

  
At the same time, the five hoisted themselves out of the water and hung on to the posts until they could get their balance. Dean looked down. The log was only about ten inches in diameter, so his feet curved slightly around it. If the log was stable, Dean could have stood on it all day…well, at least an hour or so…but it was suspended by the ropes, which meant it swayed. Dean found himself standing like a surfer, feet spread and arms out wide, bent at the hips.

  
“Oh, shit.” Charlie’s surprised voice rang out a split second before Dean heard the splash. He turned his head and could see her swimming towards shore. He bet she was pissed.

  
“It’s been ten minutes,” Jeff called out to them from the beach. The cameramen were in boats surrounding them.

  
Sweat was rolling down Dean’s back and face. His nose itched, but he was terrified to move. Someone shrieked and there was another splash. He saw Jo’s blonde head bobbing in the water.

  
“Twenty minutes.”

  
Dean knew Jodi wanted this bad, not so much for the hotel, but for the immunity. Otherwise, she was going home tomorrow. Their odds were better though, since there were two of them. He just needed to hang on.

  
A splash and then Jeff’s voice. “Jodi’s down. That just leaves Castiel and Dean. I’m going to venture a guess that neither of you care who wins at this point?”

  
Dean looked at Cas first and then at Jeff. He grinned. “I think I can take him.”

  
“Castiel, I think Dean just challenged you.”

  
“Dean will lose.” Cas’ husky voice sounded behind him. Dean chuckled.

  
“Come on, Babe, just jump…you know I’m taking you with me.”

  
“Shall be place a side wager?” Dean wanted so badly to shift around so he could see Cas.

  
“What kind of side wager, Cas?”

  
“Winner gets to pick the dinner and the television shows.”

  
“I don’t think there will be too much call for the television with you two,” Jeff teased from shore and the three women laughed loudly. Dean blushed to his toes.

  
“I’ll let you take the first shower if you jump, Cas,” Dean called over his shoulder.

  
Charlie’s voice rang out, “Don’t do it Castiel, you know y’all will be sharing a shower.” Damn the woman.

  
“Are your legs getting tired, Dean?” Cas asked innocently. The little bastard was enjoying this too much.

  
“My legs are fine, Cas. Just fine.”

  
“Forty-five minutes,” Jeff yelled.

  
His nose was itching like a son of a bitch now. Carefully, he brought his right hand to his face and scratched and that’s when it happened. He lost his balance and his foot slipped. He hit the water with a huge splash. When he surfaced, he looked up at Cas. Cas was smiling smugly down at him.

  
“Paybacks are a bitch, Babe.”

  
“I’m looking forward to it, Dean.” Cas gave him a sly smile and dove into the water next to Dean.

  
When they got to the beach, Jeff was smiling at them. “Castiel wins immunity. And guys, just remember you have tribal council tomorrow…don’t stay up too late.”

  
The women snickered and even the cameramen and crew were grinning.

  
The boat was a small skiff and the two men sat in the back. The driver pushed down on the throttle and the boat shot forward. Dean was suddenly feeling kind of shy. He kept his eyes glued to the scenery as they sped down the coastline. The driver turned the boat and they were heading south out to sea.

  
Cas took Dean’s hand, interlacing their fingers. “You’ve been quiet,” he said over the sound of the motor.

  
Dean felt himself blushing. “I’m a little nervous.”

  
Cas threw back his head and laughed. “You get naked and let the cameras film us making out, but you’re nervous about being alone in the hotel room with me?”

  
“When you put it like that…it sounds stupid,” Dean muttered, embarrassed. He felt Cas squeeze his hand.

  
“Dean, you don’t sound stupid. Not at all. I think it’s adorable.”

  
“Adorable? What the fuck, Cas? I’m not a freakin’ puppy,” Dean exclaimed, a frown marring his otherwise perfect features.

  
Cas took Dean’s face into his hands and Dean had no choice but to stare into those expressive, blue eyes. “No, you are not a puppy. You are an incredibly handsome man, with a beautiful, though temporarily thin, body. You are intelligent and have a wonderful sense of humor. You have a kind and caring heart. For me, you are the perfect man.”

  
Dean had never been really in love before, not until that exact moment. He swallowed nervously because what did one say after all that? He hoped his eyes conveyed everything he was feeling. The corner of Cas’ mouth lifted and he placed a very chaste kiss on Dean’s lips. “Relax, Dean. We are going to have a good night.”

  
“Yeah…we are,” Dean murmured.

  
The boat pulled up to a dock lined with expensive yachts. The driver jumped up on the dock and helped them out. “I will meet you at this same spot tomorrow morning at eight. Don’t be late. Go into those doors right over there…” He pointed to a set of double doors at the back of a large stucco building. “…they are expecting you.”

  
Dean and Cas walked across the lush grass, past a garden of tropical flowers and into the cool interior of the building. Dean shivered. His body had acclimated to the heat and the air conditioning was almost too cold. He was thankful he wore his t-shirt, as dirty and ratty as it was.

  
A tall dark skinned man waited for them. He glanced at his clipboard. “Dean and Cas-tee-al?” His accent was almost musical sounding.

  
“That’s us,” Dean offered with a smile.

  
“I am Kachine. I will escort you to your suite.” He turned abruptly and led them across a small lobby. Dean felt out of place as filthy as they were compared to the other guests in their expensive resortwear. Cas walked confidently, but then again, Cas was used to digs like this…being a famous writer and all.

  
***

  
Crowley barged into Jeff’s temporary quarters about thirty minutes after Cas and Dean left the island. “Why did you let them go without a cameraman?”

  
Jeff looked up from the dailies he was looking at. His co-producer looked like he was going to have a stroke. “I made an executive decision, Crowley.”

  
“This is the hottest thing we’ve had in a while, Jeff…and you’re just handling these two…like…like…you want them to live happily ever after or some bullshit like that.”

  
“Maybe I do. We’ve got footage of them leaving together. We’ll also have footage at the resort tomorrow morning of them coming out of their room and traveling back here. After fifteen years, I think I know what I’m doing, Crowley.”

  
“I sure fucking hope so,” Crowley snarled and left. Jeff winced at the slamming of the door. Crowley was just going to have to get over it. Jeff was playing the romance card. He hoped the American public would see it that way.”

  
***

  
The room was beautiful. Dean went from the living room, to the bedroom and into the bathroom. He felt like a kid on Christmas morning. It was understated elegance. He ran back to the living room where Cas stood smiling at him indulgently. “You should see the bathroom, Cas.”

  
“As long as there is a shower and a real toilet, I will be incredibly happy.”

  
“Well, speaking of showers…let’s go.” Dean was eager to get clean and get Cas naked. Cas allowed himself to be led through the bedroom and onto the cool tile floor of the bathroom.

  
“Nice,” Cas murmured about his surroundings as Dean started unbuttoning his shorts. Naked and side by side, they brushed their teeth with the new toothbrushes provided by the hotel. With his breath minty fresh, he was ready to move things along.

  
Once they were under the strong, hot spray, Dean pulled Cas against him. Cas looked into his eyes and his smile made them sparkle. Small beads of water clung to his lashes and Dean thought he was gorgeous. “I…” Dean bit his lower lip. He’d almost said the three words. The three dreaded words that might scare Cas off. They hadn’t even known each other a month yet. A month wasn’t long enough for two people to fall in love…was it? Dean was more than halfway there. He’d admit it to himself, but he wasn’t ready to let Cas know.

  
Cas was looking at him questioningly, waiting for him to finish. “I…uhm…love the water pressure.”

  
One of Cas’ eyebrows rose and Dean knew his ruse didn’t work, but Cas wasn’t going to push him. For that he was thankful.

  
Their kisses under the pounding water had them hard and gasping for air. Dean pulled back, his trembling knees betraying him. Cas looked back at him, his kiss swollen lips slightly parted. “God, Cas, I want you so bad.”

  
“And I you, Dean.” Cas raised his hands from Dean’s waist and let them venture slowly up Dean’s stomach to his chest. Never breaking eye contact, he brushed his thumbs over Dean’s nipples. Dean arched towards him, craving more. Dean cupped the back of Cas’ neck and guided him down. Cas’ mouth closed over one nipple and Dean moaned. Cas sucked the sensitive bud into his mouth. Dean’s cock throbbed and like he instinctively knew what Dean needed, Cas’ hand cupped his length. Cas moved to the other nipple and Dean felt the brush of teeth.

  
“Yessss.” The word ended with a hiss. Dean’s hands gripped Cas’ shoulders now. It took all of his energy to keep himself upright. All he wanted to do was sink to his knees, taking Cas with him. Feel his heated skin against his own.

  
He felt like he’d been through a month of foreplay. There was a part of him that just wanted to push Cas against the wall and fuck into him, but the other part…the part of himself he’d kept hidden for so long just wanted to make this last.

  
Cas lifted his head and Dean’s deep feelings for the man took control. He cupped Cas’ cheeks with his palms and brought their faces together. Their lips so close together that Dean could feel the small puffs of air. “Dean, please…” Cas whispered against his mouth and Dean was lost.

  
Dean didn’t know how long the kiss lasted, nor did he care. He was with Cas and that was all that mattered. “Need you, Cas.”

  
Cas growled and took control. He gently pushed Dean away and turned off the water. He ripped open the shower curtain so hard that Dean was afraid it was going to come down on top of them for a second. Cas snatched up two towels and all but threw one to Dean. His man was eager. Dean smirked. More determined than ever to make it last.

  
Before he even had a chance to dry himself, Cas had his hand and was pulling him into the bedroom. Dean found himself flat on his back gazing up at Cas. His smooth chest tapering in to a trim waist, his cock erect and proud, jutting out from a bush of dark curls. He was breathing fast and Dean slowly spread his legs in invitation. Cas’ eyes went from bright blue to stormy gray in a millisecond.

  
Cas put a knee on the bed and then stopped. “Fuck.”

  
Okay, that wasn’t a passionate ‘fuck’, that was more of a pissed off ‘fuck’. “What?”

  
“Condoms…lube…” Dean slapped his hand over his face and groaned.

  
Cas grabbed the phone. Dean sat up on his elbows. “Cas, what are you going to do?”

  
“Get us what we need.”

  
“You can’t just call the front desk and say, ‘hey, bring us some supplies because I want to fuck my boyfriend.”

  
Cas smiled. “Boyfriend? I like that, Dean.” Cas punched the ‘O’ on the phone. “And yes, I can.”

  
“This is Castiel Novak in Room 231. I need to speak to the concierge desk please. Thank you.”

  
“Cas…hang up the phone.” Dean whispered harshly.

  
“Yes, this is Castiel Novak. I am in need of a few items...yes…yes, I have a credit card…yes…one box…no, make that two boxes of condoms and personal lubricant…yes…thank you…” Dean listened in shock and amazement as Cas rattled off his credit card number. How did he do that? Dean could barely remember his phone number and Cas not only had his number memorized, he had his expiration date and security code as well.

  
“Thank you again.” Cas hung up.

  
“I can’t believe you did that,” Dean said, shaking his head.

  
“He will have the items delivered to our room in ten minutes.”

  
“Seriously? Ten minutes?”

  
“He recognized the numbering sequence as an American Express Platinum. He will make sure the items are delivered in a timely manner and no one else in the hotel will need to know.”

  
Dean figured that was another perk about being with a famous author.

  
Since both of their erections had flagged, Cas wrapped the fluffy white bathrobe that was hanging behind the bedroom door around himself. He spied the small refrigerator and opened it. When he turned around, he was holding two beers. Dean grinned. He got the other robe down from the hook and put it on. They sat on the couch and Dean flipped on the television.

  
Ten minutes, to the second, there was a soft knock on the door. Cas got up and opened it. A young man held out a plain paper bag and Cas scrawled his signature on the small clipboard the man held out.

  
“What do you say we eat first,” Dean suggested.

  
Cas cocked his head sideways, but shrugged. “Sure.”

  
Dean got the menu off the coffee table and opened it. His mouth watered. He was tempted to order one of everything…except lobster, fish, rice, fruit and clams.

  
They made their decision and called it in. Cas was looking at him strangely. “Are you okay, Dean.”

  
“Sure,” Dean met his eyes. He read the emotion on Cas’ face. “Cas, I want you…God knows, I want you, but once we start…we ain’t stopping for a long time. We need our strength.”

  
Cas’ face visibly relaxed. “Besides, we have two boxes of condoms to use before morning,” Dean said cheekily. Cas laughed and they snuggled down on the couch to wait for their food, hands entwined as they watched an old black and white movie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay...now the bad news. I will try my hardest to write while I'm at this conference, but it is working conference, so not sure if I'll have time. Thank you for being patient.
> 
> I will probably hear a collective groan when you get to the end...no sex...or sex interruptus...but look at the bright side, the next chapter will be sex, sex, sex...after all they do have two boxes of condoms. And I did leave you with a nice set of pictures to fantasize about while you wait.


	12. Chapter 12

Dean leaned back and patted his belly, slightly rounded now. “That was awesome.”

Cas looked at him affectionately. “I just hope you don’t get sick.” Dean had eaten his meal and some of Cas’.

Dean weaved his fingers through Cas’. “No, I’m good.” Dean stood and pulled Cas to his feet. He picked up the bag with his other hand and led Cas to the bedroom. He met Cas’ eyes and slowly untied the belt of Cas' robe. With a brush of his fingers, it fell to the floor. “It seems like I’ve waited forever for this.”

Cas hand came up and Dean felt his fingertips brush along his jawline, then on ghosted over his lips. “I’ve waited a lifetime for you, Dean.”

Dean’s breath caught and his heart hammered in his chest. “Cas, I…” The finger pushed against his lips in the age old sign to hush.

“Make love to me, Dean.” Cas’ voice was husky with desire. Dean’s robe joined Cas’ and he tugged him to the bed. With a gentle shove, Cas was on his back. Laid out before Dean like a buffet. Dean’s cock was heavy between his legs and he stroked himself once…twice. Cas moaned softly, his eyes on Dean’s hand. Dean's mouth was suddenly dry. He licked his lips and knelt on the bed.

The kiss seemed to go on forever. Dean couldn’t get enough. He held Cas with both hands tangled in the dark waves of Cas’ hair. Cas’ hands were clutching at his back hard enough to bruise. Their hips rolled gently, pressing their erections together until they were both slick with precum. Dean broke the kiss and chuckled softly when Cas growled. “Don’t worry, I’ll be back.”

Dean’s mouth moved down Cas’ neck and across his collar bone. He paused there to suck a mark before moving on to one of Cas’ nipples. He pulled it into his mouth, feeling the bud harden. He bit down softly and Cas arched under him, his nails digging into Dean’s back. “God, Dean…please.”

Smiling, Dean transferred his attention to the other one, sucking and nipping until Cas’ breaths were harsh gasps of air. Dean pushed up on his hands to gaze down at Cas. The other man looked wrecked and knowing he was the one to bring about that look made pride swell in Dean’s chest.

He dipped his head and delved into Cas’ belly button, flicking his tongue around it before leaving a trail of kisses down the small trail of hair that led south to Cas’ thick bush. Dean inhaled. He smelled of soap and a musky scent that was all Cas. He took a moment to look at Cas’ thick cock and he licked his lips in anticipation. He sat back on his heels and spread Cas’ legs with the palms of his hands. He could see Cas’ puckered entrance.

Rimming wasn’t something Dean did. He’d had it done to him, but a few people, both male and female, but had yet to want to try it for himself. But now…now, he wanted to eat out Cas until the man couldn’t even remember his name. “Cas, turn over, Babe. Hands and knees.”

Cas did as he was told and damn, the man’s ass was a masterpiece. Dean placed his hands on each globe and pulled them gently apart. There it was. He looked at the pink hole and flicked it with his tongue. Cas jumped and let out a startled mewling sound. Dean made up for never having done this by spending a very long time lapping at Cas’ hole. Wet with spit, it quivered under Dean’s ministrations. When he finally rose back up, he saw Cas’ hands clutching the sheets like a lifeline. He rubbed his palms up and down Cas’ back. “I’m going to fuck you so good, Cas…so good.”

Dean dumped the contents of the bag unceremoniously on the bed next to him. He picked up the familiar looking white tube of lube and ripped off the plastic safety seal. He tossed it off the bed and unscrewed the cap. Squeezing a healthy amount in his hand, he began to move it around to warm it. With his other hand, he reached between Cas’ legs and cupped the man’s balls. Cas groaned and his hips bucked. “Easy, Babe. Just going to get you ready now.”

He rubbed his thumb over Cas’ swollen entrance, coating it with the thick gel. His mouth had done a great job of relaxing the tight muscle and one finger slide in easily. “So tight and hot.”

Dean moved his fingers from Cas’ balls up his shaft, wrapping his fingers around it. Cas thrust into his hand. Dean inserted another finger, moving them in and out…slowly at first, but the more Cas fucked his fist, the faster Dean worked his hole. It wasn’t long before Dean had four fingers fucking Cas’ ass. The smell of sex was thick and the way Cas was writhing, Dean thought he could make Cas come with his fingers alone.

He slowed down and moved his hand away from Cas’ cock. Cas’ softly whimpered, “No” was almost Dean’s undoing. He quickly ripped open the foil packet with his teeth and rolled the condom down his length.

“I’ve got you, Babe…” Dean moved his hand up Cas’ spine until he cupped his shoulder. With his other hand, he grabbed the base of his cock and brought the head to Cas’ hole. “Ready, Cas?”

“Please.” Cas pushed his hips back and Dean entered Cas’ tight heat. Dean let his head fall back and he let out a soft moan of pleasure. Inch by inch, he eased inside. When his hips were flush with Cas’ ass, he stopped moving. They were both still, their breathing rough and broken. Cas rolled his hips, silently giving Dean the sign that he was ready. Dean pulled out until just the head of his cock was inside of Cas. He looked down at the point they were joined and the sound that came out of his mouth was feral. He moved slowly, not wanting to hurt Cas. He continued to watch his cock moving in and out. “Dean…more…faster…”

Dean snapped his hips, driving his cock deep. Cas’ body jerked. “Yessss,” he hissed.

“Fuck, Cas, gonna come…” Dean couldn’t stop the train…he pounded into Cas once more and his orgasm ripped through him. Even though his brain wasn’t firing on all cylinders, he knew he had to take care of Cas. He eased out and flipped Cas onto his back. Without preamble, he took Cas’ cock in his mouth. Cas cried out and thrust up, gagging Dean. Dean quickly got with the program and relaxed his throat. He pushed two fingers into Cas’ fucked out hole and by Cas’ scream of pleasure, knew he found the right spot. The blowjob was quick and dirty. Cas clutched at Dean’s hair, fucking his mouth with wild abandon. A few seconds later, Cas grunted and his body stilled. Hot, bitter cum spurted down Dean’s throat and he sucked it all down. He let his forehead rest against Cas’ thigh, finally allowing himself to come down from his own high.

He reached down and pulled the condom off his softening dick and tossed it off the bed. He’d deal with it later. For now, all he wanted to do was lie down beside Cas and sleep. He dragged himself up the bed until he reached the pillows and let his body collapse, one arm slung over Cas’ chest. Post orgasm bliss and the soft mattress combined to lull Dean into a deep slumber.

It was dark when something woke Dean. He was disoriented…where was he? The wet warmth around his cock gave him the answer. Cas. As his eyes adjusted, he could make out Cas’ body bent over him, his head bobbing up and down on Dean’s dick. “Cas…damn…” Dean combed his fingers through Cas’ hair lovingly.

Dean heard a crinkling sound and Cas’ mouth was replaced by his hand rolling a condom down his shaft. Cas rose to his knees and straddled Dean’s hips. Dean watched, eyes full of desire, as Cas eased himself down on Dean’s cock. Cas’ hands flat on Dean’s chest, the man began to fuck himself. Dean gripped Cas’ thighs and let himself be ridden. “Feels so good, Babe. Never be able to get enough of you,” Dean whispered, past the point of caring about the meaning behind those words.

Cas’ silhouette above him was the true definition of art. Head thrown back, spine arched, hand gripping his cock as he moved his hips up and down, impaling himself over and over again. “God, you’re beautiful,” Dean murmured.

Not needing words between them, their pace increased. Dean thrust up in rhythm with Cas, faster and faster. Their ragged breath and the steady slap of skin against skin shattering the quiet tropical night. “Dean…Dean…” The steady mantra of his name from Cas’ lips was driving Dean to the brink. Cas suddenly cried out and Dean felt the splash of hot cum on his belly.

The vice like grip of Cas’ body sent Dean tumbling into the abyss with a soft grunt. Cas’ body nestling with his was the last thing Dean remembered.

Glaring morning light woke Dean. He groaned and dragged a pillow over his eyes. He reached over the mattress and the bed was cool. He sat up quickly. “Cas?”

Cas appeared in the doorway, the white robe showing off his dark tan. A soft smile graced his face. “Good morning.”

“Why are you out of bed?” Dean pouted.

“I thought you’d be hungry when you woke up, so I ordered room service.”

“Coffee too?” Dean asked excitedly.

Cas’ smile widened. “Of course.”

Dean bounced out of bed and snatched up his robe from the floor. In the living room was a cart covered in dome covered dishes. On the table was a large coffee urn with a sugar container and a small pitcher of cream. Dean was in heaven. One by one, he removed the domes. Cas had ordered bacon, pancakes, scrambled eggs, toast, hash browns, and fresh strawberries with whipped cream. There was also a large pitcher of orange juice. The two men dug in.

Feeling fat and happy, Dean sprawled across the bed with Cas, his fingers rubbing small circles on the other man’s back. “I don’t want to go back,” Dean said, breaking the silence.

“We have too. You need to win a million dollars.”

“You could win, Cas. Everyone fuckin’ loves you.”

“But you deserve it,” Cas replied. The telephone startled both of them. Dean shrugged and picked up the receiver.

“Yeah?”

“Your handler will be waiting downstairs in fifteen minutes,” said the heavily accented voice.

“Thanks.” Dean hung up and groaned. “We have fifteen minutes.”

Thankfully, Cas had insisted they wash their clothes in the sink the night before and they laid them out on the balcony to dry. They quickly dressed and Cas came over to stand by Dean, who was staring at the box of condoms and the lube. The one single condom left out of the first box was lying next to them. “So much for using up our supply,” Dean muttered.

“We can take them back with us,” Cas suggested.

“I’m still not up to making jungle porn, Cas.”

Cas shrugged and turned away. Dean stared at the items a few more seconds and then opened the box. He shoved the four remaining condoms and the lube in his pockets.

When they opened the door, the cameraman was waiting and that’s when it hit Dean. They hadn’t seen a camera crew since they left the island.

They were followed down the hall by the film crew and the handler was waiting in the lobby. “You two ready?”

“Guess so,” Dean said. They were led through the hotel and out to the dock. The same boat was waiting for them. Once they were underway, Dean met Cas’ eyes and they shared a smile. As the boat skimmed over the water, Dean found himself watching Cas. He’d fallen for the man - hook, line and sinker. How did Cas feel about him?

Once they landed on the island, the handler led them back to camp. They were greeted warmly by the remaining tribe members.

“Tutuila, tribal council is tonight,” the handler said before disappearing down the path.

Dean and Cas spent the day telling the tribe about their hotel room, the food and the shower. They didn’t mention their exploits, but Charlie and Jo teased them anyway.

“At least you got to shave. Whisker burn would have been a bitch,” Charlie said. Jo and Jodi laughed along with her.

“Yuck it up, ladies. Y’all are just jealous that I got this hot man all to myself,” Dean said, grabbing Cas’ hand.

Later in the morning, Dean and Cas went fishing and brought in a large grouper. They all ate and as the afternoon wore on, a tense silence settled over them. Dean knew it was because of the vote. Jodi was withdrawn and went for a walk. Dean felt bad for her.

As they filed into the tribal council area, Jeff greeted them. “Tutuila, it is down to you five. How have the dynamics of the tribe changed, Jo?”

“It’s funny, when I’ve watched the previous seasons, this is the time when people begin to play nasty.” She made eye contact with each of the remaining tribe members. “But with us, it’s different. There isn’t a person here that I wouldn’t be happy for if they won.”

“I’ve got to say, we’ve never had a season like this one,” Jeff concurred. “Dean. Cas. How was your getaway?”

“It was great, Jeff. Nice to take a shower and sleep in a soft bed. I won’t be taking those things for granted any time soon.”

“Any romance?” Jeff asked.

Dean looked at Cas and he caught the slight shrug. Cas was leaving it up to him. “I don’t kiss and tell, Jeff.”

Jeff grinned. “Good for you. Now, let’s get to the vote. Castiel has immunity and cannot be voted off.”

Dean wrote down Jodi’s name and looked at the camera. “Jodi, in another life, I think you and I would be friends. You are a tough woman and I wish you well.”

Jeff sat the container on the podium and looked out over the tribe. “Whoever’s name I read tonight will make an impact on this tribe.”

The tribe nodded. Jeff unfolded the first vote. “Jodi.”

Charlie and Jo took Jodi’s hands. “Jodi. Two votes Jodi.”

Jeff opened the next one and flipped it over. “Jodi. The twelfth person to leave Survivor Upoli. Jodi, bring me your torch.”

Dean and Cas both stood and hugged her. Jo and Charlie wiped tears from their eyes. Jodi walked up to Jeff with her head held high. “Jodi, the tribe has spoken.” He smothered her torch and she turned to them.

“Good luck, guys. It was an honor.” She walked down the path and they watched until she was out of sight.

“Only four members of the original Upolu tribe left. The next tribal council will be tough. Go rest up for tomorrow’s challenge.

It was hard for Dean to get comfortable that night. Only one night in a hotel and he was spoiled. He tossed and turned until he felt Cas’ arms come around him. A soft kiss landed next to his ear and he felt his body relaxing. He laced his fingers through Cas’ and brought their hands to his mouth. He kissed Cas’ knuckles. “I’m glad you’re still here.”

“Me too.”

With the morning, came the daily confessional. The handler posed Dean with his back to a palm tree. “If you weren’t in the running, who out of the other three would you want to win the million?”

“Cas. Not so much for the money, but because he was so introverted when we got here. Now, he’s comfortable in his skin. He’s got confidence and I’m proud of him.”

“It’s no secret you spent the night together in a nice hotel. Is your romance going anywhere after Survivor ends?”

Dean looked away from the camera. “I don’t know. I hope so.”

Back at camp, Jo and Charlie went to check tree mail. They came back a short time later with the bamboo tube.

**_“Without your eyes you are lost,_ **

**_A wrong turn will come at great cost.”_ **

When the truck dropped the four of them off, Dean saw Jeff standing in front of a huge fence. Samoan symbols covered the wood.

“Today’s challenge is simple. You will each be blindfolded. You must make your way through a maze. Whoever finds their way to the other side first wins immunity and a reward. Want to know what you’re playing for?”

Jeff paused while the tribe nodded. “The winner will pick another tribe member to join them at a private spa. An entire day spent being massaged and pampered.”

Jo squealed and that caused everyone to laugh. Jeff turned and opened for gates in the fence. The tribe members were blindfolded and before Dean’s eyesight was obstructed, he saw towers along the edge of the fence with cameramen standing on each one.

Dean heard Jeff call “Go,” and he moved forward, hands out in front of him. His steps were short and deliberate. He’d done this so many times in firefighter exercises that he thought he’d have the advantage. Especially since he didn’t have a hundred pounds of bunker gear and SCBA equipment on.

It seemed like he was going in circles. He concentrated on the number of steps he took, but somehow he knew he was not making progress. As the minutes ticked by, he got more and more frustrated. He should have had this challenge in the bag.

“Charlie wins immunity,” Jeff called out and Dean whipped the blindfold off in disgust. He looked around and headed towards the tower where Jeff was not standing. Even without his eyes covered, he took a few wrong turns and had to backtrack.

Cas was already standing next to an excited Charlie when he found the exit. Jo came out a few seconds behind him.

Dean and Cas got in the back of the truck, while Charlie and her pick to share the challenge, Jo, got into a jeep. Back at camp, Cas nudged Dean’s shoulder. “There is a silver lining, you know.”

“What’s that, Cas?” Dean asked, still pissed at himself for botching the challenge.

“You and I are alone. Well, alone with two cameramen.”

“Practically an orgy,” Dean said, his foul mood lifting. Cas’ eyebrow rose.

“I don’t share.” Cas’ voice dropped lower and his look was possessive.

“Good to know,” Dean said, tugging Cas’ hand towards the beach. “Let’s go swimming.”

They swam out beyond the breakers and embraced. They kissed, wet, open-mouthed kisses Dean felt down to his toes. He knew the cameraman on the beach was filming them, but he couldn’t listen to their conversation.

“When you went to confessional, did they ask you about us?”

Cas lifted his mouth off Dean’s jaw where it had been leaving a trail of soft kisses. “Yes.”

“What did you say?” Cas sighed and pulled back so he could look at Dean.

“I said that I didn’t know what the future holds for us, but that I…” Cas stopped. Dean waited, but nothing else was forthcoming. Cas seemed embarrassed.

“What? Talk to me, Cas? What did you say?”

Blue eyes came back to his and Dean saw a mixture of confusion with something else…something he couldn’t identify.

“I told them that I thought I was…falling in love with you.”

“Cas…I…uhm…” Dean floundered. Cas was falling in love with him…with him.

Cas’ smile was sad. “You don’t have to say anything, Dean. I know your situation and realize…”

“You idiot. I love you. I know it’s crazy…God, we haven’t known each other long…but I want to be with you, Cas. I don’t know how, but we can figure out something…I know we can.”

This time, Cas’ smile made the corners of his eyes crinkle. “Yes, we’ll figure out something.”

Alone in the shelter that night, they kissed and touched. Dean was still in shock that someone like Castiel Novak would want a future with someone like him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tomorrow morning, I'm leaving for a writers retreat in the Georgia mountains. There is no wifi and spotty cell service. Bad news, you will have to wait until next Monday for a new chapter. Good news, I will probably finish this one while I'm gone and you will be able to read the whole thing.
> 
> I will be completely off the grid, so I will miss you guys. Please don't forget about me.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for your patience. I have finished this story while on my writers' retreat and got a lot of great new ideas. I always come away from our retreats excited after spending time with my friends - all of them are great writers. We learn so much from each other.
> 
> All that being said, I missed you all. Being off the grid was hard. I could only check in on Facebook once or twice because of where we were. The mountains of Georgia are beautiful, but cell reception sucks. And our mountain cabin didn't have wi-fi.
> 
> I'll be posting the rest of the chapters today.

Around eleven, Jo and Charlie returned to camp with two of the cameramen. Cas was already asleep, but Dean was still wide ass awake. He sat up when he heard the girls giggling as they neared the shelter. Charlie wiggled her fingers at him and he waved back. He left Cas sleeping and joined them at the fire.

  
“I’m taking it y’all had fun.”

  
“It was amazing, Dean. We got to shower,” Charlie exclaimed. Dean laughed. A full day of pampering at a resort and they were excited about a shower. Dean listened as the two girls told him all about their day. It wasn’t until they’d wound down and began to yawn that it hit them that Charlie had immunity and tomorrow Jo, Cas or he would be voted off. He didn’t say anything to the two women because they were still floating on air about their day.

  
It wasn’t until the next morning that it hit home for all of them. One minute they are eating rice and fruit and talking…the next minute a silence falls over them. Dean wasn’t going to be the one that brought it up. He knew Charlie and Jo had bonded and he was afraid the two of them would vote for either him or Cas. He and Cas would be voting for Jo, they had no choice.

  
He was watching Cas snorkeling for lobster when Charlie eased up behind him. “Jo went to the latrine and I wanted to talk to you.”

  
“Vote for me, Charlie. Not Cas.”

  
Charlie eyed him strangely. “Dean, I was going to vote for Jo. We talked early on about an alliance, remember?”

  
“Yeah, but Charlie, you and Jo…you’re tight.”

  
“We are, but I don’t go back on my word.”

  
“You’re the best, Charlie. I wish you lived closer to Texas.” She gave him a soft smile and punched him in his bicep.

  
“I’ll come to your wedding.”

  
“Huh?”

  
She gave him a pitying look. “Oh, Hon, you and Cas…you’re going to marry him, aren’t you?”

  
“Damn, Charlie, we’ve only known each other a month. Marriage? That’s a big fuckin’ deal.”

  
“You love him, don’t you?”

  
Dean looked out over the water and saw Cas raise his head to take a breath. “Yeah.”

  
“So, marry the guy.”

  
The afternoon sun was going down when the handler came into camp. “Grab your torches and your personal items, it’s time for tribal council.”

  
As they took their seats, Jeff smiled at them. “Tonight’s vote will be hard, won’t it, Castiel?”

  
Cas met the host’s eyes and nodded solemnly. “Yes. I will have to cast a vote for a friend tonight and it grieves me.”

  
“Charlie, you have immunity tonight. Was it easy to make your choice about who to vote for?”

  
“Easy? Are you kidding? Tonight’s vote is a bitch.”

  
Jeff introduced the jury and Dean looked over at the fallen tribe members. They were clean and looking well fed. He wondered how they would vote if it came down to him or Cas. Strangely enough, he was at peace with losing to Cas.

  
Charlie voted first. Then Jo. Jo’s eyes were glistening when she came back. Dean took his turn in the secluded area. He wrote her name. He showed his paper to the camera. “Jo, you are special to me. I love you, kid.”

  
Once Cas was back in his seat, Jeff collected the container and brought it to the podium. “I’ll read the votes.”

  
He unfolded the first paper and held it up. “First vote, Dean.” Dean turned and looked at Jo. He gave her a smile that he hoped would tell her she was forgiven. Her eyes were red and he knew she was fighting tears.

  
“Jo. One vote Dean. One vote Jo.” He opened the next paper. “Jo. One vote Dean. Two votes Jo.”

  
Jeff turned the last parchment sheet to the cameras. “The thirteenth person voted of Survivor Upolu. Jo. Jo, bring me your torch.”

  
As one, the remaining tribe members stood and one by one embraced Jo. With dignity that Dean admired, Jo walked up to Jeff. He touched her arm gently before snuffing out her torch. “Jo, the tribe has spoken.”

  
“I love you guys,” Jo told them before turning to walk down the path. The jury filed out. Jeff looked at them.

  
“Only one more challenge remains. Tomorrow, it will come down to just two survivors. Are you ready?”

  
The three nodded stoically. They picked up their torches and headed down the trail to the jeep that waited to take them back to camp. The three laid side by side in the shelter.

  
“I can’t believe we made it this far,” Charlie said softly.

  
“Yeah, it’s pretty wild,” Dean replied.

  
“Whatever happens tomorrow, I want you both to know that while I didn’t want to participate in this…game…I’m glad I’m here. Glad I can count you both as friends.” Cas’ voice was full of emotion and Dean took his hand. He tugged him close and Cas didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around Dean.

  
“You two are just so adorable. It’s so sickeningly sweet, I may barf,” Charlie teased.

  
“Men are not adorable,” Dean argued.

  
“You are pretty adorable,” Cas whispered next to Dean’s ear and Charlie giggled when Dean groaned dramatically.

  
Dawn was clear and bright. The friends made breakfast together and ate. By mutual agreement, they didn’t talk about the challenge or the tribal council that would come afterwards. They walked to get the tree mail together. Charlie read it aloud.

  
**_“Three will become two,_**  
 ** _Strength and endurance await you.”_**

  
Cas took Dean’s hand and led him to the beach while Charlie had her confessional.

  
“Whatever happens at tribal council, I don’t want to lose you, Dean.”

  
“You won’t. We’ll figure out a way, Cas.” Dean had given it a lot of thought. Cas was a writer. He could write anywhere, couldn’t he? He could come to Austin and they could be together. In his head, it made perfect sense, but could he ask Cas to give up his home…his friends…all that, just to be with someone he’d only known a little over a month? As the morning wore on, Dean’s stomach twisted into knots.

  
When they met Jeff on the beach that afternoon, Dean took in the scene. Jeff stood next to three platforms. On each platform was two buckets. Above the platform was a series of bamboo pipes. “Today’s challenge is all about strength and endurance. You will each stand on the platform with a bucket in each hand. You will hold them out from your body. Every minute, a cup of water will be poured into each bucket from the pipes over your heads. You can’t let your arms drop or you are out of the game.”

  
Cas, Dean and Charlie stepped up on the platforms and at Jeff’s sign, picked up their buckets. Even empty, Dean knew holding something out from your body for an extended period of time was difficult. He adjusted his stance so that the buckets were directly under to spouts in the bamboo pipe as instructed.

  
When the first splash of water hit his buckets, he adjusted his grip and squared his shoulders. “Coming up on two minutes,” Jeff told them. Dean didn’t look at the other two survivors, he focused his attention on one of the cameramen to his left. He had strength and stamina from all his years with the fire department, but he’d gotten soft from lounging around the island most of the time.

  
“Charlie’s out,” Jeff called. Dean hated himself for the sigh of relief he felt. She would not have immunity to force Dean to vote for Cas. The seconds ticked by and Dean was beginning to feel the strain. He already had two cups of water in each bucket and they’d almost reached the next minute. Sure enough, as he finished his thought, more water splashed into his bucket. He arms were shaking from the effort to hold them aloft.

  
“Castiel is out. Dean wins immunity.” Dean lowered his buckets and the ache in his arms after only three and a half minutes proved to him that once he got back to the real world, he’d be in the gym to regain his strength.

  
When he stepped down, he looked at Cas. The man looked calm and collected, he wasn’t rubbing his arm muscles like Dean. Did he throw the challenge so Dean would win? No, Cas was a writer. He sat at a desk all day typing on a keyboard. There’s no way he could have outlasted Dean…right?

  
Subdued, the three rode back to camp in the back of the jeep. Dean found himself absentmindedly rubbing Charlie’s back. Once they were seated around the fire, Charlie spoke. “You two listen to me. I’m an IT geek and I never expected to make it this far. You two have played the game fairly and you’re both nice guys. It makes me happy that for once the good guys didn’t finish last. Maybe there’s hope for humanity after all.”

  
Dean felt his face redden. “Come on, Charlie, don’t make me out to be some sort of hero.”

  
“Don’t sell yourself short, Dean,” she said, her small hands coming to read on his shoulders. “Coming out like you did took a lot of courage.”

  
Coming out? God, how could he have forgotten? He’d gotten so used to the cameras that he’d forgotten when the show aired in a couple of months, the entire world would know that Dean Winchester liked dick…liked Cas’ dick. He felt sick to his stomach and it must have showed because Charlie frowned at him.

  
“Castiel, can I steal your boyfriend for a minute?” Dean saw Cas nod in his peripheral vision. Charlie led the way to the beach. She plopped down in the sand and Dean had no choice but to sit with her.

  
“Do you really care what people think of you, Dean?”

  
“No,” Dean said adamantly. Charlie gave him a disbelieving look. “God, Charlie, my crew…my friends…fuck, most of my family think I’m straight. Now, I’ve got to go home and tell everyone that I’m in love with a man…” He stopped and looked at the cameraman that had followed them and sighed.

  
“You can go into a burning building, but telling people that care about you that you love a man scares you? That’s fucked up, Dean. If they really care, do you think it matters to them who you love as long as you are happy?”

  
“My dad…my dad wouldn’t…” What was Dean worried about? Fuck, his dad ditched him and Sam years ago. Did it matter?

  
“Dean, Castiel loves you. It’s easy to see it by the way he looks at you. You can’t have some meltdown and walk away from him. I don’t know him very well, but I can imagine that he doesn’t give his love freely.”

  
“I know that, Charlie. I want to…to spend my life with him. But fuck, what am I going to do? Ask him to leave his life in Boston to come to Austin, Texas?”

  
“They have fire departments in Boston, Dean. Would you be willing to move for him?”

  
Dean looked out at the rolling waves for several minutes, his teeth worrying his lower lip. “Yes.”

  
“You need to tell him that, Dean. I saw your face back at camp. So did Castiel. You need to make this right.”

  
Dean, jumped up and pulled Charlie to her feet. “Thanks, Charlie.”

  
He broke into a trot, leaving her to follow more slowly. He broke through the jungle and looked around wildly. Cas wasn’t there. “Where is he?” Dean asked the cameraman standing at the treeline.

  
“Confessional.”

  
“Damn it.” Dean paced the length of the camp, back and forth. Charlie returned and gave him a questioning look. “He’s at confessional.”

  
When Cas returned to camp, he didn’t meet Dean’s eyes and told Charlie he was going to lay down. He told Charlie, not him. “Cas, I want to…”

  
“Not now, Dean,” Cas said, cutting him off. Dean looked to Charlie and she gestured with her eyes and head to go after him. Dean caught Cas’ arm.

  
“Cas, I’ll move to Boston for you,” Dean said quickly. Cas stared at him for a shocked moment.

  
“Dean, what…why would you do that?”

  
“Because I love you, God damn it.” The cameras were rolling and Dean didn’t give a flying fuck. He wasn’t going to lose the best thing that ever happened to him. They stared at each other, less than a foot apart.

  
“Jesus, kiss the guy already,” the cameraman said peevishly. Charlie giggled. The corner of Cas’ mouth quirked up and Dean kissed him. Someone cleared their throat and Dean pulled away reluctantly.

  
One of the handlers stood there. “Dean, it is time for your confessional.”

  
Dean followed her to a small clearing and positioned him on a smooth rock. “Tonight’s tribal council will be the last one before the final two. I think the viewing audience will know who you aren’t voting for. Is this thing you have with Castiel going to carry over in your real life?”

  
“Yeah. Yes, it is. I do love him and I don’t care who knows about it. If my friends don’t like it…” Dean shrugged and talked directly to the camera. “then I guess they really don’t care about me.”

  
The handler asked a few more questions about the prize and his experiences, but Dean answered them distractedly. His mind was on what he’d just said. Dean Winchester, the man who had this need to be the best…to prove he was good enough, just told the world he didn’t care what people thought. It was an eye opening experience. All through the fire academy, his father had told him he’d never make it and it pushed him to not only finish, but to excel. Why was he worried about his old man anyway, John left his life and hadn’t contacted Dean or Sammy in going on seven years.

  
Charlie walked in the middle of the two men as they entered tribal council. “Dean, you have immunity tonight and can’t be voted off. You can vote first,” Jeff said. Dean caught Jo’s eyes and she beamed at him. She was freshly showered and her blonde hair fell around her shoulders like a golden veil. He made eye contact with each of the jurors. They would choose a winner between him and Cas.

  
Dean wrote Charlie’s name down and looked at the camera. “Charlie, writing your name hurts. We will stay in touch. You are like the little sister I never wanted.”

  
When Jeff snuffed out Charlie’s torch several minutes later, Dean’s chest hurt and he held Cas’ hand tightly.

  
“You two head back to camp. The last tribal council will be tomorrow night. The jury will be casting the final vote.”

  
Later that night, they stretched out on the platform, all the blankets under them to form a softer place to sleep. Keenly aware of the cameras, Dean gave Cas a chaste kiss and was going to end it there, but the stress of the tribal council made him need to feel Cas’ arms around him. He moved closer and brought his face to Cas’. “I want you so much.”

  
“I love you, Dean. It won’t be much longer. We’ll be together.”

  
Dean’s hand roamed over Cas’ shoulders and down his sides. The red light from the camera was only three feet away. “Dude, it’s our last night…could you give us some privacy?”

  
“Sorry, just doing my job.”

  
When he awoke, Cas was looking at him, a soft smile on his face. “Good morning, Dean.”

  
“Morning, Cas.” Dean sat up and stretched. Today was the last day on this island and he wanted to enjoy it. “Come on, let’s go to the beach for a swim.”

  
They swam far out into the ocean, far enough the camera crew could not hear them. “Dean, you realize that I can write anywhere, right?”

  
“I know, but Cas, your brother and your nieces. You love them and I’ll know they’ll miss you.”

  
“I’m only a plane ride away,” Cas said softly.

  
“You’d do that for me. Uproot your whole life.”

  
“I’d do it for us.”

  
As they walked across the sand to the tribal council that night, Dean saw the helicopter sitting idle on the beach. He knew from past seasons, after the jury cast their votes, Jeff would take the votes to the helicopter and fly off. Six months from now, Dean or Cas would be announced the winner.

  
The two men sat facing the jury. All those voted off looked back at them. “Each of you will have a few minutes to make your case to the jury to tell them why you deserve to win Survivor Upolu and become the sole survivor. Then, the jury will have the opportunity to ask you questions. Castiel, you’re first.” Jeff stepped back.

  
“I’m not sure I do deserve to win. Unlike all of you, I didn’t want to be here. My agent and the publishing house thought this would sell more books. Once I was here, I realized it meant more than selling books to me. I challenged myself. I made friends,” Cas said, his eyes cutting to Dean. “It’s changed my life in a way the million dollars never would.”

  
Cole stood up and asked, “It doesn’t matter to you who wins, right?”

  
“Right,” Cas answered.

  
“So, if you win, will you split the money with Dean?”

  
Cas tilted his head to the side. “I would give Dean as much as he needed, yes.”

  
***

  
Crowley watched the live feed from a temporary booth and groaned, head in his hands. This had taken on the feel of a Lifetime movie instead of the cutthroat show it was supposed to be. For Dean and Castiel, it was a win-win situation. He hoped Jeff’s theory paid off.

  
***

  
The jury asked a few more questions of Cas and then it was Dean’s turn. Dean stood and faced them. “I came on the show to win. Like, Cas, I didn’t expect to make friends or have a life changing epiphany. I wanted the money to help my little brother, to pay off bills, to make my life easier. Now, as long as I’ve got someone who cares about me in my corner, I feel like I’ve won already.”

  
“Any plans on the two of you staying together after this is over,” asked Victor.

  
Dean looked over a Cas. Encouraged by what he saw reflected in those blue eyes, Dean replied, “Yeah, we’ve talked about it. We’re going to try it and see what happens.”

  
The remaining questions were generic and Dean answered as openly and honestly as possible. The viewers would see quite a difference in the Dean that landed on the island thirty-nine days ago and the Dean that stood in front of the cameras now.  
The jurors disappeared one by one to cast their votes for the winner this time. Their fate was in the hands of people they’d voted off. Surprisingly, Dean didn’t care about the vote. Win or lose, he got Cas. There was a part of him that still wanted to please people, a part of him that hoped Sam was proud of him. Proud of the way he played the game.

  
Jeff brought the jug containing the votes to the podium. He said his usual spiel and Dean knew the viewers at home would see Jeff getting on the helicopter and winging off to New York. For those watching their televisions, only a week would pass before the last episode. In reality, the cameras stopped rolling and Dean joined Cas being ushered to a truck. The jurors were on board with them and they were taken to a dock where they boarded the same boat that brought them to the island. They skimmed over the water and soon the lights of Pago Pago came into view on the horizon. The trip could have been a tense one, but the jury was surprisingly upbeat and talkative. They all had to sign a contract that forbid them to discuss the outcome of the show with anyone, even their families.

  
It was in the wee hours of the morning when Dean and Cas were shown their rooms. Card keys in hand, they entered the elevator. “I hope you aren’t expecting to be in a room by yourself,” Dean whispered conspiratorially.

  
“The only expectation I have is a night of great sex,” Cas said with a wink.

  
They stopped by Cas’ room and gathered his luggage that was waiting for him. When they opened Dean’s room, Cas put his suitcase on the floor next to Dean’s. Both men dug through they luggage and located their cell phones.

  
“Let me…”

  
“Can I just…”

  
“Call Sam and I will call Jimmy,” Cas said and they both took their phones to opposite sides of the room so they wouldn’t disturb each other.

  
“Sammy, it’s me.”

  
“Dean, so it’s over, huh? How did it go?” Dean closed his eyes. He didn’t realize how much he could miss his brother’s voice.

  
“You know I can’t say anything, Sam.”

  
“But I’m your brother.”

  
“Yeah, and I want to win a million dollars. That’s all I’m saying. How are things at home? How’s Bobby?”

  
“Crotchety as ever. He does miss you though.”

  
“And I miss him. They are supposed to be flying us out on Wednesday. I’ll call you with the flight information when I get it.”

  
“Alright. Have fun tomorrow. Be a tourist.” Dean was going to have fun, but being a tourist was the last thing he wanted to do. He wanted to stay in bed with Cas all day.

  
“I’ll do that. See you soon, Sammy.”

  
“Bye, Dean.”

  
Cas was still on the phone when Dean hung up. He couldn’t help but listen to Cas speak to who he assumed was his nieces.

  
“I promise, Grace. Yes, there are monkeys here and no, I cannot bring you one home. No, I don’t love Angela more. She just asked for something a bit more accessible than a monkey. Would you like a picture book instead?”

  
Cas rolled his eyes at Dean, but Dean knew Cas was happy to be talking to his nieces. Dean took his toiletries out of his suitcase and took the kit into the bathroom. He started the shower. Cas joined him a minute or two later. “Sorry about that.”

  
“Don’t apologize. Family is everything, Cas.” But Cas wasn’t listening. No, Cas was gazing at Dean’s body. Dean smirked. “See something you like, Mr. Novak?”


	14. Chapter 14

Showered and shaved, the two men fell onto the bed. Cas’ hands were verywhere at once. Dean’s mouth latched onto the other man’s neck, sucking and biting. Dean grasped hunks of Cas’ hair and held him still, bending his head back to allow access to the tender skin of Cas’ throat. Dean was achingly erect and when Cas gripped Dean’s ass and pulled them together, Dean gasped. He let Cas manhandle him onto his back and the man was straddling Dean’s hips. The velvety skin of his cock against Dean’s hip made him weak with need. Dean wanted Cas like he’d never wanted anyone before. He’d always been able to walk away from any relationship, but Cas was different. He needed this man. He gazed into Cas’ lust blown eyes and whispered, “Make me yours.”

Cas mouth seemed to feast on Dean’s, biting and then licking to soothe. His tongue taking only to retreat moments later to allow Dean’s tongue to access his mouth. The kisses were wet and messy and Dean was lost in a haze of lust. He felt Cas’ fingers wrap around his cock and he arched his back, thrust up into Cas’ fist. “Condoms?” Cas’ voice was husky with desire.

“Shorts…lube too,” Dean managed to say. He growled when Cas took his hand away and his hips thrust upwards still seeking Cas’ touch. Dean’s eyes followed Cas as the man strode into the bathroom where Dean had dropped his shorts. When he came back, he held the condoms and the lube in his hands. He tossed them down on the bed and crawled up the length of Dean’s body. “Missed you,” Dean mumbled, wrapping his hands around Cas’ neck and pulling his face down to his.

“I’m here now,” Cas murmured and took Dean’s mouth in another scorching kiss. The man could kiss. Dean was once again writhing under Cas trying to find friction. “I think I owe you something.”

“Hmmm,” Dean tried to wrap his head around Cas’ words, but with Cas’ fingers pinching his nipples, he couldn’t quite focus on something as mundane as the English language.

Cas mouth followed his fingers and he started sucking on Dean’s very sensitive buds, first one and then the other. Dean whimpered and his fists clinched at the sheets. Just when Dean didn’t think he could take it anymore, Cas shifted down until he was tonguing Dean’s navel. Dean was incredibly ticklish there and he let out a very girlish giggle. He heard Cas’ deep chuckle. “Not funny, Cas…ticklish…”

Dean tried to push Cas’ head down. Little Dean wanted some attention. Cas kissed the tip of his cock and then he sat back on his haunches. He reached over to grab a pillow and without ceremony shoved it under Dean’s hips. Before he could figure out what was going on, Cas’ mouth was on his hole and waves of pleasure were crashing over him. “Fuck.”

Cas’ eyes met his from his position between Dean’s legs and damned if Dean cared that he was begging. “Please…God…Cas…more…” Cas was giving it his all. He was tonguing Dean’s entrance and the wet slurping sounds were driving Dean crazy. When Cas added his finger to the mix, Dean breath began to come in short, vicious pants. He had to touch himself or he’d explode. He used the precum that had pooled on his belly to slick up his shaft. Cas ate his ass for what seemed like hours and every time Dean felt himself getting close, Cas would stop his strokes with a hand over Dean’s. 

Legs spread wide, Dean felt wanton and weak as a kitten. Cas’ finger was thrusting into him over and over and while he’d played with himself on occasion, Dean had never experienced anything quite like it. Cas fingertips would brush against his prostate and it would send an electric charge though his body with each pass. What would it be like to have Cas pounding into him? What would it be like to be fucked?

“Another, Cas,” Dean whispered. Cas’ eyes were so dark blue, they almost looked black in the light from the bedside lamp. Without taking his eyes away from Dean’s, Cas pushed in another finger. Dean moaned, “Cas…Cas…more…” Dean wasn’t sure what he was begging for…anything…everything…he wanted whatever Cas could give him.

“Dean, do you want me to fuck you?” Did he? He couldn’t form a coherent thought. It was Cas though. He just nodded, unable to form words.

He was hanging onto his sanity by a thread, Cas’ fingers were pumping in and out of him, faster and faster. It felt so damn good. He found himself thrust back, meeting Cas halfway. He didn’t even have the energy to stroke himself now, his hand just held his cock loosely. He was vaguely aware of the sound of Cas opening the condom. And then Cas was up on his knees, looking down at Dean. “Are you sure?”

Again, Dean nodded. “Words, Dean. Yes or no?”

Dean swallowed the lump in his throat. He was about to lose his virginity…he giggled. At Cas’ concerned look, Dean nodded again. “Yes, Babe.”

He felt the pressure at his entrance and automatically tensed. Cas leaned down, inches from his face. “We don’t have to do this, Dean. I’m okay with…”

“No…want this…” And Dean found that he was sure now. He did want this. Cas kissed him and then he got into position again. But this time, he scooted back and licked the tip of Dean’s cock and when he looked up, his lips were slick with Dean’s arousal. Sweet Jesus. If Dean died right this second, he’d die happy. Cas shifted and this time, he pushed in. Dean could actually feel the head of Cas’ cock breech his sphincter muscle and he breathed through the burn. 

“That’s it, Dean, breath through it. It will get better. I promise.” Cas voice was low and sexy as fuck. Inch by inch, Cas pushed into him. It was agonizingly slow and Dean could see sweat beading on Cas’ forehead. He felt full and when Cas’ hips were flush against his spread thighs, he wrapped his legs around Cas and dug in his heels. Cas eased out of him and Dean was suddenly turned on by the way Cas was looking down at their joined bodies. His mouth was slack and he had a look of wonderment on his face. When he pushed back in though, he found Dean’s gaze and held it. “I love you, Dean…more than you’ll ever know.

“Love you too, Cas…” Cas’ movements were slow and calculated and while Dean wanted it slow at first, now he was getting antsy. He began to push back, meeting Cas’ easy rolling hips. “Need more, Cas. Fuck me like you mean it.”

Cas chuckled and he wrapped his long fingers around Dean’s ankles, lifting them up and out. He snapped his hips and soon his cock was hitting Dean’s prostate with each and every thrust. Cas was pounding into him now and God, it felt fuckin’ awesome.

“Dean…need you to…come…I’m close.”

Dean reached down and started stroking his cock, he pumped into his fist, fast and tight. Cas’ breathing was erratic now, harsh gasping in between loud moans of pleasure. Dean felt the white heat in his belly, the tightening in his balls. “Gonna come….Cas…Jesus….” Dean eyes widened as the sensation of falling overtook him and he cried out. Thick, hot cum splashed over his belly.

“Dean…” Cas threw back his head and howled as he pounded into Dean. “Oh, God…” Suddenly, he froze and Dean could feel the other man’s cock throbbing inside of him and he imagined Cas pumping him full of cum.

Later, after they were clean again, Dean rested his chest against Cas’ back. He breathed in the man’s scent and kissed along Cas’ neck and shoulders. Cas’ left arm was behind him, resting on Dean’s hip. “What do you want to do tomorrow?”

“Stay in bed,” Cas answered softly.

“I’m good with that.”

“I do have to get some souvenirs for the girls though,” Cas said with a sigh, like the thought of getting out of bed was worse than death.

“I saw a gift shop in the lobby,” Dean suggested.

When they woke, it was late afternoon. They showered and Dean swore he’d never take it for granted again. Both dressed in shorts and clean shirts. Cas’ was a pale green polo and Dean’s was a dark gray t-shirt that read Austin Fire Department in red letters. Dean picked up the clothes he’d worn for thirty-nine days and dumped them in the trashcan. Cas did the same. 

In the lobby, they saw Charlie, Benny and Jo sitting in the small bar. Dean waved and called out that they’d see them in a few minutes. 

The dark skinned beauty behind the counter greeted them with a smile. “Welcome. Can I help you find anything?”

“We need gifts appropriate for five year old girls,” Cas replied. She came around the corner and motioned for him to follow her. Dean stayed up front looking through the souvenir shot glasses. He should get one for each of his crew. He picked out seven different ones and then decided he needed something for Sam. He strolled over to a rack of t-shirts and found one that said, ‘American Samoa is for Lovers’.

Cas and the shop clerk came back up front and his boyfriend’s arms were full of a variety of things. Dean watched Cas dump the items on the counter. He had a stuffed monkey, a stuffed sea turtle, two small t-shirts, two colorful books and a pretty decanter set. Dean figured that later one was for Cas’ brother and his wife.

The woman promised Cas she would have the items boxed up and sent up to his room. He asked her to send it to Dean’s room instead and she gave them a knowing look before nodding. Dean placed his gifts on the counter as well and she swiped his credit card. “You can have them sent to my room too.”

They hurried back to the hotel’s bar and found their friends. They were joined by Victor and Jodi. Dinner turned out to be fun and they stayed out late. From the hotel’s bar, they drifted out to the beach and found a island party. 

By the time Cas, Charlie, Dean and Jo stumbled back to the hotel, the sun was rising. Victor, Benny and Jodi had disappeared around midnight. The two men stripped down to nothing and fell into the bed exhausted. 

Midmorning, the banging on the door roused Dean and he pulled on his shorts. He flung open the door angrily. “This better by good,” he snarled.

One of the show’s handlers stood there. “I have your plane tickets.”

“Oh, yeah, right.” Dean took them from her. He read the departure time. He had three hours. 

“There will be a bus downstairs to take you to the airport at one. Make sure you have your passport ready. Do you have any idea where Castiel Novak is? He isnt’ answering the door.”

“He’s with me. I can give him his ticket.”

She didn’t act like she wanted to hand it over to Dean, so he shrugged. “You can come in and give it to him yourself. He’s still in bed.”

Dean smirked as she all but shoved the ticket at him. He noted that Cas was leaving at the same time. They were departing Pago Pago and arriving in Honolulu. From there, they flew into LAX where Dean boarded a plane to Austin and Cas would be hitting Memphis and then on to Boston.

He put the tickets on the table by the television and went back to bed. He spent a few minutes looking at Cas, at the way his eyelashes fanned over his tan cheeks, at the way his hair curled in wild abandon, at the way the tiny lines around his eyes disappeared in slumber. He wanted to wake him and make love one more time, but Cas was sleeping so soundly, Dean didn’t have the heart to rouse him.

Dean set the alarm on his phone to give them time to take a quick shower and pack their things. He put his head on the pillow and he was out. His alarm didn’t wake him, the banging on the door did. “What now?” 

“What?” Dean growled. A bellmen stood holding two boxes. 

“Your purchases from the gift store.”

“Oh, thanks.” Dean took the boxes and sat them on the floor. “Hang on a sec.” He went to the bedside table and grabbed his wallet. He gave the guy a few bucks and closed the door behind him. When he checked the time, he realized his alarm was getting ready to go off anyway.

“Cas?” Dean sat on the edge of the bed. “Come on, Cas, time to get up.”

“Go away,” Cas mumbled and covered his head with a pillow.

“We’ve got to get up, Babe. We have to leave for the airport in about forty minutes.”

Cas mumbled something that sounded like ‘fuck the airport’, but Dean couldn’t be sure.

“Okay, you’re going to miss showering with me. Just sayin’.” Dean stripped off his shorts and walked into the bathroom. He bent over to turn on the water and felt Cas pressing up against him. He smiled. Somehow he knew Cas wouldn’t be able to resist.  
After an extremely satisfying hand job from Cas, ending in a gloriously sexy blow job for Cas, the two men shaved side by side in the twin sinks. Dean kept looking up and he couldn’t keep the smile from his face. Cas with dirty teeth, bad breath and a beard had been beautiful. Cas with clean teeth, minty breath and a smoothly shaven face was breathtaking. 

In the lobby, the handler reminded them of the confidentiality contract once more before she herded the jury and the two finalists onto the bus. They all talked like old friends and the ride to the airport passed quickly. After checking their bags and passing through security, the group boarded the plane. Dean traded seats with Cole to be able to sit next to Cas.

Hands clinched to the armrests, Dean readied himself for takeoff. “Dean, are you okay?”

“Yeah, sure, just hate to fly. Not natural, you know?”

Cas gave him a reassuring smile and put his hand over Dean’s. “I’ll be with you.”

Who knew four little words could calm his nerves. Dean felt grounded and the takeoff wasn’t as scary with Cas next to him. 

“What happens when we reach LAX?” Cas question came out of the blue and Dean stopped thumbing through the in-flight magazine to look up at him. Cas must have sensed Dean’s confusion. “I just wanted to know if you wanted me to call you when I got home…or not.”

“Dumbass, of course, I do. I guess we need to make plans, huh? I don’t know if I can get away any time soon, since I pretty much used up all my leave time to do Survivor. I might be able to trade a few shifts and get three days in a row…”

“Dean, you don’t need to worry about coming to see me. I told you, I can write anywhere. I can take care of a few things in Boston and then come down to Texas for a week…

“Just a week? Damn, Cas, that’s not enough time.”

Cas’ smile lit up his face. “I just didn’t want to assume you would want me in your home longer than a week.”

The Honolulu airport was bustling and it took forever to get to the next gate and the group barely made it in time. The flight was over five hours and both Dean and Cas napped. The captain’s voice over the intercom roused them. They were about to land.   
The small group began exchanging phone numbers and other information. Jo looked like she was going to cry. It seemed to hit them all that once they landed at LAX, they would be going their separate ways. The calmness Dean felt with the knowledge Cas would be in Texas within the week began to dissipate. For forty-one days now, Cas had been a constant…even before they were together, Cas was there. Now, he was going to be getting on a plane without Dean. He wove his fingers through Cas’ and even after the seatbelt sign was turned off and they were free to exit the plane, Dean didn’t want to let go. Cas looked at him quizzically when he needed both his hands to get his backpack out of the overhead compartment. “Sorry,” Dean said, his face reddening.  
Dean stared at his ticket. He was departing out of Gate A16. “What gate you got?”

Cas looked at his own ticket. “D31.” Dean’s heart sank. They weren’t even in the same section of the terminal. Cas put his backpack down and took Dean’s face between his hands. “Dean, two weeks. Wait for me and I’ll be there before you know it. We’ll talk on the phone. Please don’t worry.”

“I know. I keep telling myself that and then I remember that you’re a freakin’ bestselling author with friends and family…and a life…

“Now who’s being the dumbass?”

Dean felt a pair of small arms slip around his waist and he turned. Charlie stood there with Jo standing just to her left. He hugged them both and then they embraced Cas. Walking away from them was hard. Dean walked to his gate with the weight of the world on his shoulders. Once the plane was in the air, he asked the flight attendant for a drink. Two whiskeys and he felt buzzed. All the time on the island made him a lightweight. 

Sam met him and the sadness disappeared. He was home. Sam was there. And Cas promised him he’d call him when he landed. Everything was going to be fine.

At home, Dean turned on the air conditioner and the ceiling fans to erase the mustiness. He opened his refrigerator and frowned. He should have stopped at the grocery store. At least he had beer. He sat at the table and went through his mail before taking his bag upstairs to unpack. He arranged the few shells he’d collected on a shelf in his bedroom and finished putting everything else away. Since he’d be on shift tomorrow, Dean decided to lay down to rest before Cas called. 

The ringing of his phone woke him and he blinked at the bedside lamp. He was disoriented and then he remembered he was finally home. He yanked the phone off the nightstand. “Cas.”  
“Hello, Dean.”

“How was your flight?” What a lame question, Winchester.

“It was fine, Dean.” Cas’ deep smoker’s voice gave Dean a warm feeling in the pit of his belly.

“I miss you.” And now, he sounds like a girl. Great.

“I miss you too. I love you, Dean, and I can’t wait to see you again.”

And Dean was grinning like an idiot. 

Dean’s crew gave him a great welcome. Chief Cain even hugged him and slapped him soundly on the back. They wanted to hear all about his stint on the show, but Dean explained that he couldn’t discuss it. They were disappointed, but seemed to understand. It took Dean a while to get back in the swing of things, but by lunch, he was ready when the first call came in. The traffic accident kept the crew busy for two hours. Dean got to use the Hurst tool and cut a pregnant woman out of her car. He held her hand while the paramedics checked her over. She thanked him before the paramedic slammed the door to the ambulance. He was grinning when he got back in the truck. That was why he loved his job. Helping people.

They had one more call before nightfall and then Dean joined the rest of the crew teasing Ed about his cooking. As they sat around the table to eat, Adam asked him if he’d met any cute girls. 

“There were a few nice looking women,” Dean said. “You’ll fall in love with Jo. Charlie is really cute, but she doesn’t do dick. Bela was gorgeous, but a bitch. Lisa was pretty, but a bit strange. Meg was a dancer, she was pretty hot. All the rest of the women were a bit old for you, Adam.”

“So, did the famous Dean Winchester hook up with any of them?” Luc asked.

“No, I just played the game,” Dean replied, not meeting Luc’s eyes. He knew he needed to tell his crew before the episodes began airing, but how was he supposed to broach the subject? He was on the roster for KP duty, so he cleaned up the kitchen and loaded the dishwasher. When he was done, instead of joining his crew in the dayroom to watch television, he sought out the chief who was in his office.

“Chief, can I talk to you for a sec?”

“Sure, you know better than to have to ask, Winchester.” 

Dean shut the door behind him and took a seat in front of the chief’s desk. He stared at his clasped hands long enough for the chief to clear his throat. “Winchester, you okay?”

He looked up. “I don’t know.”

The chief exhaled sharply and leaned forward. “Dean, talk to me.” The chief calling him by his first name opened the gates.

“I met someone on the show. I fell in love…with him. His name is Cas…Castiel Novak.”

“Him?” Dean winced, but he nodded.

“I always thought you were straight, Dean.”

“Yeah, about that…I just never broadcast it…I didn’t think the guys would…accept me.”

“Dean, I don’t give a flying fuck who you are boinking, as long as you’re happy and you don’t bring any drama to the station.”

“Thanks, Chief, but I’m not sure the guys will fill the same way.”

“You do realize this crew is a family, right? We were all there when Harry’s wife lost the baby last year. We stuck together when Luc got in trouble for spouting off at the mayor after the drunk asshole wrecked his car and paralyzed the old man. We're family and I won’t tolerate discrimination of any kind in my station.”

“I just don’t want to cause trouble.”

“This guy…you really love him?”

“I do,” Dean said honestly, meeting the chief’s stare head on.

“And you guys…do stuff…on camera?”

Dean’s face burned with embarrassment. He nodded. “I’m sure they’ll edit it for television.”

“You’ll need to tell the crew soon then.”

“I know…I was hoping…would you stand with me?”

“Dipshit, of course. Just let me know when.”

Dean shrugged. “I guess the sooner the better, huh?”

The chief stood up and walked around his desk. Dean followed him out the door and down the hall. When they entered the dayroom, Luc recognized something was up and muted the television. All eyes focused on Dean and the chief.

“Men, Winchester has something to tell you. And I want you all to remember we’re a family here.”

Dean looked over their heads at the window that opened onto the bay. He could see the engine and the squad gleaming red under the fluorescent lights. The chief was right. These men were his family. He’d follow any of them into a burning building and he hoped they felt the same after he dropped his bombshell.

“Luc, when you asked me if I hooked up with anyone, I said no. That wasn’t really a lie. I didn’t just hook up with someone. I fell in love with someone.”

Grins and catcalls filled the dayroom. “Why didn’t you say so, that’s cool,” exclaimed Adam. One by one, they realized Dean wasn’t smiling. Dean felt the chief’s hand on his shoulder.

“What’s going on, Winchester?” asked Michael, the lieutenant on squad.

“His name is Cas.” Dean said softly and looked down at his feet. You could have heard a pin drop in the silence that followed Dean’s announcement.

“Good one, Winchester…real funny,” Gordon said, a nasty smirk on his face.

No one else spoke. Dean lifted his chin. He wasn’t ashamed of his love for Cas and no one was going to make him feel that way. He looked at the faces of his crew…his family…his friends. Luc stood up and walked over to him and held out his hand. Dean took it. “So, when do we get to meet the man that is finally getting Dean Winchester off the streets?”

Dean smiled. “In two weeks. He’s flying down from Boston.”

“Boston?” Michael called out. “Damn, man, a yankee? 

“Got a picture?” Adam asked, also standing and coming forward.

“Yeah, I took a few at the airport.” Dean pulled his phone out of his pocket and pulled up Cas’ picture. He showed them the selfie they took in front of the fountain at the Pago Pago airport.

“Not bad, Winchester,” Luc said. “So, what does this guy do?”

“He’s an author. He writes the Angel Blade series.”

“What?” Ed jumped off the couch and snatched the phone out of Dean’s hand. “You’re in love with Castiel Novak? The Castiel Novak?”

Proudly, Dean nodded. “Yeah, and surprisingly enough, he’s in love with me.”

Dean was punched in the arm, hugged and teased by his crew. All but Gordon Walker. He left the dayroom. When Dean saw him leave, the chief shook his head. Walker wasn’t the most popular member of the crew. He transferred over from Station 32 last year. He had an anger problem the chief had to deal with several times. Dean said a silent prayer that Walker wouldn’t cause any problems.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a bit harsh. I've written John Winchester as a homophobic (for his fans - I'm sorry).

Dean’s week flew by. His off days, he spent visiting Bobby and working on the Impala. She needed a good wash and wax after sitting in the garage for over a month. He did a tune-up and oil change while he was at it. He talked to Cas every night, sometimes for hours.

His next shift was a busy one. The first call came as soon as he dropped his gear by the truck that morning and they had five more before dinner. Walker was keeping his distance and Dean stayed away from him. Dean was glad Walker was on squad and not the engine.

They were finishing up dinner when the tones sounded. “Station 21, Engine 21, Squad 21. Fire at 6546 West Algonquin.”

Chairs scraped loudly against the tile floor as the men jumped up. Dean ran to the truck and pulled on his bunker gear, snapping the suspenders on his shoulders before pulling on his coat. Helmet in hand, he climbed into his seat. Soon, the engine was speeding down the road, lights flashing and siren screaming. A block away, Dean could see flames against the night sky. 

The chief barked out orders as the trucks screeched to a halt. Dean grabbed the hose and coupled it to a hydrant. Using his spanner wrench, he opened it up and watched as water filled the hose. He raced back to the truck. “Winchester, you and Milligan get inside and check for victims.”

Dean grabbed a charged hose and with a nod to Adam, the two entered the front door of the old office building. “Fire department…call out,” Dean shouted through his SCBA mask. Adam followed closely behind. They searched each office on the first floor and headed up the narrow staircase. To Dean’s practiced eye, he could tell the fire started upstairs. He kept calling out, but heard nothing over the roar of the flames. He was almost to the end of the hall when part of the ceiling came down. He heard Adam shout and then nothing.

When he awoke, he was in a hospital bed. He blinked his eyes and groaned at the pain in his head. He reached up and touched a bandage. “Dean…thank God.”

“Cas?” Dean eyes found Cas’ face. “What are…how did you…”

“Your chief called me. I flew down as fast as I could.” Cas took his hand. “You have a concussion, but you’re going to be alright.”

“What happened? I remember being upstairs with Adam….wait…Adam…how’s Adam?”

“He’s fine. Everyone is fine. They are all outside. I should tell them you’re awake.” Cas reluctantly let go of Dean’s hand and walked to the door.

“Wait…” Dean said, but Cas was already out the door. Cas was here. How did the chief know…he must have used Dean’s phone. 

The door burst open and his crew filed into the room. Cas followed them, a warm smile on his face for Dean. It was mass confusion as everyone tried to talk at once. “Enough,” the chief shouted and everyone stopped talking at once.

“How are you feeling, Winchester?”

“I’m okay, Chief. I have a hell of a headache though.” Dean’s eyes found Adam’s. “Are you okay, kid?”

Adam nodded and there was something about his face. Dean’s eyes narrowed. “What’s going on?”

“Alright, you’ve all seen him and know he’s going to be okay. Clear the room,” the chief ordered. Dean’s crew patted his legs and waved, promising him they’d be back to see him soon. Cas was following them when Dean chuckled.

“Cas, I don’t think you have to follow the chief’s orders. Come back here.” Cas looked relieved and came to stand by Dean’s bedside. Dean took his hand before looking up at the chief. “What’s going on, Chief?”

“Walker is no longer with Station 21.”

“What? Why?” Dean furrowed his brow, confused.

“When the ceiling fell, Milligan radioed for help. I sent in Walker and Spangler. By the time they got to you, Milligan had kept the area wet so they could pull you out. Spangler got to you first and Walker…the sorry son of a bitch, refused to…” The chief’s eyes narrowed and he looked like he wanted to kill someone. Dean had never seen him look so angry. 

“I filed a report with the District Commander and when I’m done with him, he’ll be lucky to get a job inspecting hydrants.”

Dean looked down at his hand clasped in Cas’. “I was afraid something like this would happen when I came out.”

The chief’s angry voice startled Dean. “You listen to me, Winchester…not one of those men out in that hall think any different of you. Walker was a bad seed. He’s gone and that’s the end of it.”

“Your crew think the world of you, Dean,” Cas said softly. “And it’s not just them. Their wives are out there too.”

Dean couldn’t speak. He had been out in hallways on many different occasions when a fellow firefighter was injured, but knowing they were out there for him was humbling.

“Thanks for calling Cas, Chief,” Dean said, giving Cas’ hand a squeeze. And to Cas, “You really didn’t have to fly down here, Babe.”

“I tried to tell you boyfriend that you were expected to make a full recovery, but he hung up on me and the next thing I know, he’s walking into the waiting room demanding answers. Good thing you showed Milligan the pictures, so we knew who he was.”

“I did promise autographed copies to your friends,” Cas whispered. Dean chuckled, but winced as the movement made his head hurt.

He’d tried to give Cas the keys to his house, but the man refused to leave him. Sam had come in after his crew left and sat with them a long time. The next day, Dean was released. He was relieved of duty for his next shift. That gave him the next six days off. Sam picked them up and he drove them home. After he made sure Dean was okay, Sam left. 

Cas made Dean lay down on the couch. “Cas, I’m not an invalid, for Christ’s sake.”

“I never said you were, Dean. But you just got out of the hospital and I was there when the doctor told you to take it easy for the next few days.”

Over the next few days, they got into a routine. Dean was surprised how bossy his mild-mannered boyfriend could be. He wouldn’t let Dean do anything. Cas cooked and cleaned. When members of his crew dropped by to see how he was doing, Cas brought them beer. On the fourth day, the doorbell rang while Cas was upstairs changing the sheets. Dean opened the door to a deliveryman. “Package for C. Novak.”

Dean signed the form and took the box. It was heavy and he sat it on the coffee table. Cas trotted downstairs. “Did I hear the doorbell?”

“Yeah, you got a box.” Cas smiled and disappeared into the kitchen. He came back a few seconds later with a small paring knife. He slit through the tape and pulled back the flaps. Dean reached inside. “Cool…books.” There were several copies of the first book in Cas’ series, as well as a few each of all the others.

“I had my agent send them here for your friends.” Cas took a felt marker from the pencil cup by Dean’s chair and began signing them. Dean was impressed that Cas remembered everyone’s name. When he was finished, he began putting them back in the box.

“Hey, what about me?” Dean pouted. 

“You get to live with me, Dean, but if you insist, I can have Chuck send me a set of the hardbacks.” Dean stared up at the man. Was that what they were doing? Living together? 

“That’s okay, I have the whole set,” Dean said, pointing to the bookcase by the fireplace.

They got ready for bed that night and Dean watched Cas brushing his teeth. Since he came home from the hospital, Cas had brushed Dean’s advances aside. Dean was getting frustrated. The man was sleeping next to him, but he wouldn’t let Dean have sex with him.

“You know, I’m going back to work tomorrow.” 

Cas looked over at him, toothpaste foaming around his mouth. He blinked at Dean and then turned and spit. Once he rinsed out his mouth and wiped his face on a towel, he tilted his head. “I am aware you are on duty tomorrow, Dean. A twenty-four hour shift.”

“Yeah, so I’m okay enough to go to work, don’t you think I’m okay enough for sex.”

Dean found himself backed against the wall, with Cas’ face inches from his. “Is this what you want, Dean?” Cas’ palm pressed against his crotch, the cotton of his sleep pants thin enough so Dean could feel the warmth of Cas’ hand. He groaned and pushed into Cas’ touch.

“God, yes.” Dean began to rut against Cas’ hand. Then Cas dropped to his knees. Dean was a bit slow on the uptake and Cas had his pants down around his ankles in record time. His hot mouth took Dean’s cock quickly. He looked up at Dean while he sucked him. One of Cas’ hands was splayed across Dean’s stomach, while the other cupped his balls, rolling them gently. “Sweet Jesus, Cas.”

He watched his cock disappear inside Cas’ mouth, his lips tight around his cock creating a suction that was driving Dean crazy. He wanted to fuck into Cas’ mouth, but the hand on his stomach kept him pressed against the bathroom wall. “Babe…bed…”  
Cas wasn’t letting up, if anything, his mouth became more insistent. Dean combed his fingers through Cas’ hair. He missed the long hair Cas had on the island. While not as short as Dean wore his, it was shorter than Dean was used to seeing on Cas. “Cas…God, Babe…you’re going to…make me…come…”

Cas hummed and Dean felt the vibration along the entire length of his cock. “Come on, Baby, suck me…make me come…wanna watch you take my load…yes…yes…Cas…” Dean’s hips jerked as he pumped his cum down Cas’ throat. Cas swallowed it all and then gently licked at the slit, making sure he got the last drop. He sat back on his haunches and grinned up at Dean. Dean was wrecked. The wall’s support was the only reason he was still standing.

Through hooded eyes, Dean gazed down at his lover. His eyes drifted over the bare chest with those dusky nipples he’d grown quite fond of. Cas’ own pajama pants were tented in the front. Dean found the strength to pull him to his feet and then Dean turned to face the mirror, his hands on the countertop. He met Cas’ eyes in their refection. “Fuck me, Cas.”

Cas’ eyes seemed to burn into his. Without a word, Cas left the bathroom, only to return seconds later with a condom and the bottle of lube Dean kept in his bedside drawer. Their eyes met again and locked as Cas opened Dean slowly. Dean ground back on Cas’ fingers. Watching in the mirror was exciting for Dean. When Cas finally pushed inside of him, Dean moaned even though he was spent. Cas felt so good. He looked so good…so intense… “Cas...you’re so fuckin’ hot, Babe. Fuck me, Baby.” The image of Cas’ eyes looked black, blown with desire.

The sound of skin slapping against skin was loud in the small room, joined with Cas’ harsh breathing, it sounded so erotic…Dean felt his cock twitch against his thigh. He smelled raw sex…sweat, musk and the sweet smell that was all Cas. “Dean…God…love you so…so much.”

“Come for me, Babe. Come in my ass.” Cas’ face went slack, his eyes closed and he froze, muscles taut. A soft whimper escaped from his mouth and he collapsed over Dean’s back.

Much later, after a shower and some snuggling...maybe even a few giggles, though Dean would deny both until his dying day, Cas slept. Dean watched his silhouette in the darkness for some time, before finally sinking into oblivion. 

And so, their routine began, without either of them talking about the fact they were living together. A month in, Cas made the decision that he needed to return to Boston for more clothes and to meet with Chuck, his agent. He timed it so Dean could fly up with him. They left in the wee hours of a rainy Monday and arrived in Boston just after lunch. Chuck met them at the airport and chauffeured them to Cas’ condo. Dean looked around curiously. Where Dean’s house had a homey, lived in feel, Cas’ had a professionally done by an interior decorator look to it. He poked around while Cas packed up his clothing and then boxed up some of his research materials and laptop. When he left of Austin, he was in too much of a hurry to get to Dean to be worried about his work. He’d used Dean’s laptop while he’d been in Texas, having had Chuck email his files to him.

Chuck left with the box for shipping and Cas ushered Dean into his red BMW convertible. In July, Boston was very warm, but nothing like the Texas heat Dean was used too. Cas sped through town pointing out various places of interest until he slowed the car to turn into an affluent neighborhood. Dean began to get nervous. While he’d met Cas’ twin briefly, this was the official meet the family visit.

The house was something out of Architectural Digest. Glistening white pillars, dark green shutters, circular driveway paved with brick. Cas hadn’t even turned off the engine before the door burst open and two little girls flew across the driveway. “Unca Cas…Unca Cas…”

Dean watched as they attacked Cas like a small pack of velociraptors. How he managed to pull both five year olds into his arms and stand was beyond Dean. They were rapid firing questions and statements to Cas without appearing to even breathe. Dean was fascinated.

“Girls…girls…hush for a minute. I want you to meet someone.” Twin pairs of blue eyes zeroed in on him.

“Is this your boyfriend?”

“Daddy says he’s a fireman.” 

“Are you getting married?”

“Can we be flower girls?”

“Mommy says he’s too pretty to be a fireman…she says he should model underwear.”

“And your mommy needs to watch what she says in front of you,” Jimmy’s voice came up from behind them. “Girls, why don’t you get down and go tell your mother that you uncle is here.” 

Cas put them down and they raced across the yard and disappeared inside the house. Jimmy held out his hand to Dean. “I trust you’re doing well after your accident?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Dean responded, shaking the man’s hand firmly. 

Jimmy’s wife was pretty and sweet. By the end of dinner, she was teasing Dean about his future as an underwear model. Cas was grinning at his constant state of embarrassment.

On the drive back to Cas’ condo, Dean asked, “You are so close to your family, Cas. Are you sure about living in Texas?”

“I’m sure, Dean.” He clasped Dean’s hand and Dean relaxed.

Back in the Texas heat, they once again settled into a routine. July segued into August and Dean had never been happier. He’d gotten used to Cas’ writing style of disappearing into one of the guest rooms for hours and hours. During that time, Dean would work on the house, practice the guitar or watch movies. On a few occasions, they had cookouts and Dean’s crew would come over with their wives and girlfriends. Dean felt blessed that his friends and family accepted his relationship with Cas. Everyone seemed to like him.

In September, the first episode was to air. Since Dean was on shift, Cas and Sam joined them at the station and they watched on the big screen in the dayroom. Since it was before their romance started, Dean wasn’t nervous about it. It was both funny and hurtful to listen to his tribe members describing him during the confessionals. Dean supposed he did come across as a jerk. Even Cas called him an arrogant ass. For days after it aired, he got teased by his crew.

The next episode wasn’t a major event, so Dean and Cas watched it the privacy of their home. 

People began to recognize them occasionally and they’d get speculative looks. After the episode Dean dubbed “The Kiss” aired, his crew really ribbed him. Watching himself fall in love on national television was an awesome experience for Dean. He found himself watching Cas while he cooked, while he talked to his editors on the phone, while he laughed with Sam over something geeky. For the first time in his life, he was happy. No amount of money could buy this feeling.

As October ended and November began, social media was abuzz with the big gay romance on Survivor. Dean was polishing the chrome on the engine when a large, black pickup drove up on the apron. He saw Luc walk out to tell the person he couldn’t park there, when he saw Luc look up at him frowning. With the way the sun was glaring off the windshield, Dean couldn’t see who was in the truck. He put down the rag he was using and took a few steps across the bay. “Dean, your father wants to talk to you.”

Dean’s steps faltered. Luc and the chief were the only two on the crew that knew of Dean’s shaky relationship with his father. Luc walked towards him and when he got close, he murmured, “You want me to stay?”

Dean shook his head. “I’ll be okay.” He counted to ten and continued to the truck’s driver’s side window. His father stared back at him. A little grayer than the last time Dean had seen him, but he still looked the same. “Dad, what brings you here?”

“I’ve been seeing my oldest son the faggot parading around on national television. Aren’t you worried about your crew having your back, Boy? I’m surprised you’re still allowed at this station. The service must be getting soft.” The sneer on his face cut through Dean’s confidence like a knife.

“If that’s all you needed, I’ve got work to do.” Dean hated himself for the tremor in his voice. 

“Were you always queer or did that fag turn you?” 

“John, long time no see,” the chief’s voice came from behind Dean. Dean couldn’t bring himself to turn around, knowing his chief had heard John’s harsh words. His father’s face changed and a smile graced his lips.

“Cain, good to see you. It’s been a long time.”

“Yes, it has. Not long enough in my book,” Dean felt a petty sense of satisfaction when John’s smile disappeared.

“Don’t tell me you are support this…this abomination,” John’s face reddened in anger. “I thought better of you and the department.”

“Abomination? That’s a good word coming from you, John. I guess lying, cheating, drinking and gambling are okay in your book?”

John laughed coldly. “I guess I was lucky to retire when I did. I’d have never thought the fire service would turn out to be a bunch of fuckin’ pansies.”

Dean heard the shuffling of feet behind him and he finally turned. His crew formed a circle around him, arms crossed over their chests and if looks could kill, John Winchester would be dead. He looked back at his father and saw the older man’s eyes flick over his friends. With a look of disgust, he started his ignition and slammed the truck in reverse, he left skid marks on the apron as he fishtailed before pulling out on the main road. Horns blared as he cut people off.

Still trembling, Dean watched until his father’s truck disappeared. He felt hands on his shoulders, pats on his back. “You okay, Son?”

“Yeah, Chief. Just sorry you had to hear all that shit.”

“Your father was a loudmouthed bully when he was with the department. Most of us were glad to see him go. You are more of a man…a firefighter, than he ever was. You just remember that.”

His crew acted like nothing ever happened and for that, Dean was grateful.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter and the epilogue. I hope you've enjoyed the ride.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains a section that some may call dubious consent. I hope you can see it for what it was intended to be.

When Dean got home the next morning after his shift, Cas was still in bed, working on his laptop. He looked up and smiled. “Welcome home. Do you want some breakfast?”

“No, I want you,” Dean said, already stripping off his uniform. Cas sat his laptop beside the bed and looked at him with concern.

“Dean, is everything alright?”

“Yeah, fine.” Dean’s nerves still felt raw despite how he acted at the station. Cas let himself be manhandled onto his belly. Dean got the lube and seconds later, he was fucking Cas with his finger. He added another and if he was rougher than usual, Cas wasn’t complaining. 

Cas pulled himself up on his hands and knees and took what Dean gave him. Rough, hard sex. When it was over, Cas calmly got out of bed and walked into the bathroom. Dean lay on his back panting. As he came down from high, his brain started functioning. Cas? Cas hadn’t come. He looked at the closed door and unease settled over him. He got up and tentatively knocked. “Cas?”

“I’ll be out in a minute,” came his muffled response. Something was off. Dean tried the door, it was locked. Cas never locked the door. He never locked it, but always bitched when Dean walked in on him while he was using the bathroom. Dean grabbed his utility belt and pulled out his multi-tool. The good thing about old houses was the fact the doors were easy to unlock with a screwdriver.

With a few clicks, Dean pushed open the door. Cas looked up from where he sat on the floor, back against the tub. Tears wet his cheeks. The sound that came out of Dean’s mouth was one of animalistic pain. He’d done this. He dropped to his knees. “I’m sorry…Cas…God…please forgive me…” Dean felt the burn of tears in his own eyes. 

Cas didn’t speak, he just looked at him stoically, the tracks of his tears mocking Dean. Dean moved away, giving him space. He sat down on the tiles, knees up, arms hugging his legs close to his body. “I don’t have an excuse. I hurt you and I’m sorry.”

“Why?” The one word tore through Dean’s chest like a hot knife.

“I…I don’t know,” Dean mumbled. He closed his eyes, unable to look at the pain reflected in Cas’ eyes. “No, that’s a lie.” He took a deep breath and opened his eyes, meeting Cas’. “Remember, I told you about my father leaving?”

Cas just nodded. 

“He came to the station yesterday. He…he said…things. About me…about us.”

“He’s been watching.”

“Yeah, apparently the old man has become a fan of the show. Anyway, it wasn’t a warm and fuzzy reunion. I’m not making excuses, Cas. What I did to you…I’ll understand if you can’t forgive me. I know I’ll never be able to forgive myself.”

“He made you feel less of a man.”

Dean looked away from the face he loved so much. His eyes found the plant Cas had insisted on putting in the bathroom. “I guess,” he whispered.

“Do you feel like a man now?” Damn, the words cut deep. Dean’s tears spilled down his cheeks.

“No,” he sobbed, shaking his head from side to side, eyes tightly shut.

He felt the brush of fingers on his cheeks and instinctively leaned into the touch. “I forgive you, Dean. But you need to promise to talk to me…I can’t ever go through that again.”

“I promise, Cas…never again. I love you so much.” Cas took him in his arms and on the cold bathroom floor, they kissed, touched and whispered promises.

***

“The ratings are fantastic,” Crowley walked into Jeff’s office in Los Angles without knocking. “We may just set a record for the show.”

Jeff was aware of the ratings. The conservative right-wing groups were calling for boycotts and ranting about family values, but the high ratings told him that the viewing public embraced the romance between the two men. 

“Were you aware that Novak was living with Winchester in Texas?”

That was something Jeff didn’t know. “Seriously? Since when?”

Crowley opened the file folder that had been tucked under his arm. “It seems Winchester was injured while on a fire call and Novak came running. That was back in June.”

Jeff grinned. “Well, I’ll be. That’s fantastic.”

“Want me to release that little tidbit before the finale airs?”

Jeff shook his head. “No, my stance stays the same. I’m not using them.”

“Why did I know you’d say that?”

***

The airplane touched down at La Guardia. Snow was falling when Cas and Dean exited the airport. A car was waiting for them and whisked them through the crowded New York City streets to a high-end hotel. They’d been forbidden to contact the jury members until the live final episode and Dean was excited to see his friends. The filming would begin later that evening. 

“Crazy as it sounds, I’m more excited about seeing Charlie and everyone else than finding out the winner.”

Cas looked up from his suitcase, where he was laying out his clothing. “Either way, we win,” he said dryly. Over the last few months, they’d discussed the money many times. Something they hadn't discussed was their living arrangements. Neither mentioned that they were living together, it just came to be. Dean couldn't imagine not waking up with Cas. 

“I’ve already won,” Dean said softly, kissing the back of Cas’ neck.

“You are such as sap,” Cas whispered, turning so he could wrap his arms around Dean. 

“Yeah, but you love me.”

“I do, very much.”

“We have three hours to kill.” Dean wiggled his eyebrows comically.

“Yes, we do. I thought I’d call Chuck and see if he could meet me to go over my new contract.” When Dean’s face fell, Cas chuckled. “You are so gullible.”

“Asshat.”

They stripped quickly and fell on each other. Some time later, Dean rolled over on his back, chest heaving. “Damn, Babe, I won’t be able to walk for a week.”

“I need a nap,” Cas said, stretching languidly. Dean reached over and grabbed his phone. He set the alarm and a few minutes later, he heard Cas’ soft snores. Dean put his hands behind his head and stared at the ceiling. His life had changed so much in the last seven months. It was hard to believe he’d met the love of his life. Watching the episodes, he got to watch them falling in love, Cas’ statements in the confessionals about his love for Dean, his own outburst about his feelings. He looked at his suitcase and imagined the velvet box tucked into the corner.

The studio was bustling with activity. Dean and Cas were ushered around cameras, cables and pieces of a set that was supposed to copy the tribal council area back in American Samoa. The director and Jeff shouted out instructions and soon everyone was in their places.

“Welcome back, Survivors,” Jeff spoke to the jury. The cameras panned over the ones voted off and then stopped on Cas and Dean, giving the viewing audience their first look at the two clean and freshly shaven. They’d both put their weight back on and a PA held up a sign to smile. Dean flashed a charming smile at the camera and Cas’ lips quirked in a half smile.

“Let’s start with Castiel. What has happened in your life since filming stopped?”

“I’ve started another book, moved to Texas and…” He looked at Dean. “…fallen head over heels.”

“So, your on-air romance has continued?”

“Yes.”

“Dean, how are you liking life since you left Swains Island?”

“I’m back to work at the fire department and got a new roommate.” He grinned and winked at Cas.

“I’ve just got to say that this season was the most unusual season Survivor has ever had. There was no drama, no back stabbing, no petty arguments. The two tribes pulled together and became friends. We’ve had romances start and end, but we’ve never had one that the fans of the show have followed so closely. I’m genuinely happy for both of you. Now, are we ready to name the Sole Survivor?”

Jeff made a show of taking the top of the container. He pulled out a folded sheet of paper and turned it towards the camera. “First vote, Castiel. Remember, for this tribal council, you want your name to be written on the parchment.”

He unfolded another one. “Castiel. Two votes Castiel.”

“Dean. One vote Dean. Two votes Castiel.”

“Dean. Two votes Dean. Two votes Castiel.”

“Jeff, can I stop you for a second?” Dean asked. Jeff nodded an affirmative and Cas turned to him, confusion written all over his face. Hands shaking, Dean stood up and faced Cas. “Cas, we met and fell in love on national television, so it seems only right that I…” He knelt and a collective gasp came from the jury. Dean pulled the ring out of his pocket and held it out. “…propose on national television.”

Cas mouth had fallen open and he looked to be in shock. “Castiel, can you put the boy out of his misery?” Jeff said with a chuckle.

Cas nodded, seemingly unable to speak. He looked down at the ring and smiled. When he held out his hand, Dean took it and pushed the ring on his finger. The jury erupted in cheers and applause. Jeff clapped and even the cameramen and crew applauded. “Can I continue to read the votes, Dean?”

“Yeah. Thanks, Jeff.”

“I guess it doesn’t matter which one of you wins now,” Jeff said dryly. He unfolded another piece of paper. “Dean. Three votes Dean, Two votes Castiel.”

Jeff opened the final vote and read it to himself. “The winner of Survivor Upolu…” He turned the paper over. “Dean.”

Dean and Cas embraced, laughing. The jury surged forward and a group hug took up the entire video screen. Jeff looked over at Crowley and they shared a thumb’s up.

Epilogue

Writing the check to pay off Sam’s student loans was cause for a celebration. Cas stayed home trying to meet the deadline on his latest book. Dean and Sam met at their favorite bar. Dean handed Sam the check and Sam hugged him. “Thank you, Dean. You’re the best.”

“It was worth it. I’m proud of you, Sam.”

“I’m proud of you too, Dean. I’m so happy for you. Cas is a great guy.”

“Yeah, speaking of Cas. I want you to be my best man.”

“I’d be honored. Have y’all set a date yet?”

Dean chuckled. “Yep, the sap I’m marrying wants to get married on May the second.”

“What’s the significance?” 

“It’s the day we met. He thought I was an arrogant ass.”

“He wasn’t wrong,” Sam teased. Dean threw his napkin across the table.

Later, Dean pulled the Impala into the driveway and sat looking up at the house. Dean offered to sell the house and buy them something bigger and newer, but Cas wouldn’t hear of it. He’d told Dean he was proud to live in the house Dean grew up in. They did renovate the master bedroom and bath. And Cas insisted on all new appliances in the kitchen. Dean couldn’t deny his fiancé anything.

While he’d always been close with his crew, now Cas threw dinner parties and backyard barbeques. One or more of his crew were always at the house. Cas was even helping the chief’s wife, Collette, to write a book. 

As April ended, Cas’ family flew in. Jimmy and Hannah stayed in the guest room and the twins were settled into Cas’ office in My Little Pony sleeping bags, Dean had bought the week before. They followed Dean around the house and when they got bored, he buckled them into the backseat of the Impala and drove to the station. He tired them out by letting them run around, climbing on the trucks, playing with the lights and sirens and he even took pictures of them wearing his helmet.

The day of the wedding, Dean was ordered by Cas to spend the night at the station. “We are non-traditional in loving each other, Dean, but I’m insisting we follow tradition for our wedding. I don’t want to see you until we meet in front of the chaplain.”

Dean and Cas would have both settled for a quick ceremony at the courthouse, but the chief wouldn’t hear of it. When he woke on his wedding day, Dean wondered into the bay and saw his crew and the crew of the next shift polishing the trucks. The chief was in his dress uniform, white hat tucked under his arm, white gloves clutched in his hand. “You about ready to get hitched, Winchester?”

“Yes.”

“Not nervous?”

“No, I’m not. I’m marrying my best friend. I love him, Chief.” 

“I was going to wait until after the ceremony, but I think I should do this now.” The chief pulled on his gloves and put on his hat. Dean was confused. Even more so when his crew walked up to stand around him. The chief reached into his pocket and pinned the captain’s bars on Dean’s uniform. “You’ve proved yourself over and over again. You’re an exceptional firefighter and an exceptional leader. Congratulations, Captain Winchester.”

“I don’t know what to say.” Dean touched the silver bars with his gloved fingertips.

“You deserve it, Dean,” Luc said, straightening his collar. “Isn’t it about time to get this show on the road?”

The engine and the squad were driven out onto the front apron forming a vee, their front bumpers almost touching. The fire department’s chaplain stood waiting. Dozens of chairs formed an aisle. Sam and Dean took their places and when Cas and Jimmy walked out from behind the engine, Sam leaned over. “Which one’s which?” The identical twins were dressed in tailored dark suits.

“Cas is the best looking one,” Dean said with a grin. He knew which one was his future husband. He would know that face anywhere. Eyes sparkling in the sunlight, Cas turned to him and smiled.

Before Dean knew it, they were married. He looked down at the platinum band on his ring finger. He belonged to Cas now. When they turned to greet their guests, he was surprised to see not only most of the original survivors, but Jeff Probst. There was also a camera crew from Entertainment Tonight. 

The cake was as non-traditional as they were. A fire engine sat on top of a stack of books, the cake was a gift from Gabe. Gabe’s short stint on the show gave him enough notoriety that he’d opened a few more bakeries. The latest one was in Houston.  
Dean held his hand over Cas’ as they cut the cake. “I love you, Mr. Novak-Winchester.”

“And I love you, Captain Novak-Winchester.”

“Now you can have babies,” the twins’ voices rang out loudly in the bay. Everyone laughed. Dean blushed to a nice shade of red. 

“Shall we tell them?” Cas whispered against his ear. 

Dean shook his head. “Not yet.” He met Charlie’s eyes over the crowd and she winked at him and ran a hand over her belly.

**Author's Note:**

> For Christine Guillet, my friend.
> 
> For those of you who like my stuff, I've created a FB group page. I'll post my stuff there and you can give me prompts. https://www.facebook.com/groups/550258875175871/


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